Waiting for af post d&c so I can begin ttc

[Redcat85]

I too am waiting for AF post d&c. I found out I had MMC 3/23 but didnt have the d&c until 4/7. That puts me 30 days past d&c and no AF yet. I have long irregular cycles to begin with and do not ovulate properly but have never officially been diagnosed with anything. I am supposed to go back to the dr. if AF doesnt start by the end of the month. A little back history-my first pregnancy ended with natural mc at 9 wks, second pregnancy I had the help of clomid and carried to term now have a 6.5 year old dd. This was my third pregnancy ntnp, mmc at 8+5. The dr has already agreed to put me back on clomid to ttc again once I have 2 cycles. Frankly im afraid to conceive without it since the only successful pregnancy was with it. I really want to have hormone testing done before we ttc again, as I have always suspected issues. Im just not sure what the dr will agree to at this point and Im trying to just take one day at a time but I cant help but think of the future and be anxious and worry. Sorry for everyones losses as well, and thanks for letting me ramble. I hope you dont mind if I join the wait with y'all.

 

[Dollybird]

Havefaith I really pray you've caught that egg! Is opk still positive? What dpo do you suspect you are?
Aw teeny I'm so sorry af got you hope you are doing ok.
:wave: hey tryingfor1st. Sorry for your loss I know exactly what you mean about having to ttc again. I keep thinking about the fact that my 12 week scan would be next week, that I wouldve had a baby in my arms by Christmas. I'd even bought some bits and bobs :duh: it's rotten to be back at the start, and absolutely terrifying. In a way that's one of the reasons, as much as I wanna just get started, that's probably making not trying this cycle a bit easier to bare.. It puts off the inevitable worrying that will ensue! I feel like I'm contradicting myself a lot just now, but it's such a confusing way to feel - on one hand desperate to try again and to be preggo, and on the other hand terrified. Good luck with your day21 bloods, they will give u a good idea of where u stand.
Nzkiwi I'm super moody too! Finding myself being very short tempered and annoyed at things that wouldn't normally bother me. In fact sometimes I'm annoyed and don't even know why. My poor hubby has been baring the brunt I'm afraid but ive been making sure if I slip into one of those moods I remember to apologise to him and make it up to him. He's fairly understanding thankfully. Glad you scan went well!
:wave: hi Redcat. Sorry for your loss too i have irregular cycles too, and was found to have PCOS with raised testosterone levels. It took me multiple visits to my gp to get testing for PCoS, I'd suspected it for quite some time, and in the end I had to be quite forceful about it. I hope you doctor is understanding and agrees to some testing for you, the hormone testing is pretty simple really and would be a good place to start- just a simple blood test. Some cycles I do not ovulate either which can be frustrating, but I'm not very slim at the moment and I find for me that losing weight has helped me in the past, so I've started a healthy eating/fertility diet to try and speed things up. It seems that when I'm tracking ovulation and do ovulate, that we seem to catch an egg fairly quickly, or have in the past at least, I'm hoping this continues to be the case. Hope that clomid does the trick for you.
AFm I'm getting there!.. Slowly! Hoping to go back to work next week, I'm missing all my friends there, and everyone who knows about my loss has been very supportive which is nice. Hubby is away in a stag this weekend which I'm dreading, but thankfully ive arranged company for the whole weekend so I won't be on my own. I've finally stopped spotting. Meant to dip my urine today to see how the hcg is doing, but I'm hopeful that it's almost gone. Still a bit crampy, and my nether regions (lol) feel bruised.. But I imagine that's fairly normal. Xxx

 

[AnnNI]

Hi everyone. I've have a perfect ds aged 2 and 10months - concieved first month of trying and didnt even know opk's existed back then. we decided to TTC nearly 18months ago and so last July i MC at 5/6weeks (no d and c) and just recently had 2nd MC (d and c). We decided to wait for 3+months to ttc again after first MC and i got preg again in Jan but I had D and C on 19th March after second MC. It was mmc at 11weeks. But i had known for a long time as sickness and symptoms literally disappeared overnight. Had first AF 33days after d and c. I spotted for quite a while after d and c - approx 2 weeks! So now im 16 days after first AF and have been dtd all week though have been getting negative OPK'S?? Though i think im messed up this cycle due to vitamin B COMPLEX which i had abeen taking up until this week - Doc told me to stop as she thinks was causing spotting and i think it may have delayed ovulation (coz im normally 14 days)! I had lots of EWCM this week but negative OPK's - unless i missed the LH surge! lovely hearing all ure stories. Thanks .....wishing u all lots of luck for your BFPs

 

[Teeny Weeny]

TTC after a loss is such an emotionally draining time. Yesterday, I went to the infertility consultant and I now have Clomid!
However, as it happened today is CD2 and I could have started it this month, today in fact. I'm just not ready this month for assisted conception. I don't mind trying naturally which more than likely won't happen but I'm too scared to try for real if you get what I mean?!
Had I not had the MC I would be super duper happy and excited. Not scared and waiting till next month.
I'm sure I'll feel better after AF has stopped, but right now I feel a little down. Xx

 

[Dollybird]

Hi Ann :wave: sorry for your losses. Opks are funny things. I was doing them 3 times a day my last bfp cycle and never got a positive! Yet clearly I must've ovulated as I fell preggo. I was using the cheapies and also some smileys. Never got a smiley but got a near positive on the cheapie so I presume that's when I ovulated despite never getting a smiley. What ones are u using?
Teeny wow that's great about the clomid. Totally understand why u feel a bit wary about using it this cycle though, I think I'd feel the same. At least you have it for next cycle though if u need it.. Although u never know u might never need to open that packet!
I keep feeling anxious about ttc.. I feel like it's consuming my thoughts just now. I keep having thAt same worry over and over that maybe my MMC was a sign I'm not meant to have any more kids but I know that's just fear talking really.
I'm having major headaches today, nothing seems to be shifting it. Wonder if it's hormone related? Really missing my hubby whilst he's away it felt so strange last night going to bed alone. I feel quite lonely. Only one more night though. Got all my friends coming up tonight do a wee sleepover so thats nice, was only meant to be one of them but they've all jumped on the bandwagon now hehe and we having a wee takeaway and film. Hope everyone is doing ok xxx

 

[Redcat85]

hi ann, I too find it frustrating using opk's. mainly because my cycles are so long and irregular. I find myself more stressed when I used them, but I am contemplating on using them again when we are actively ttc this time. I am still waiting for af to return post d&c and will be waiting 2 cycles before ttc. I know my body is not ready yet as I feel like my hormones are still out of whack.

Teeny, thats great about the clomid! I know what you mean about being scared, I think a lot of us feel that way. I dont blame you for waiting an extra cycle either. Maybe you will feel more confident next cycle, and I sure hope you have success!

Dolly, Im sorry you arent feeling well. I too suffered from really bad headaches on nearly a daily basis for a couple weeks after my d&c last month. I wondered the same thing about it being from hormones. I hope it tapers off soon for you. It great your friends are coming down for the night, hopefully that will cheer you up some!

I am feeling somewhat down today myself. I keep thinking about tomorrow being mothers day and how i should be happily pregnant right now expecting my 2nd. I feel somewhat guilty about this as I at least have my blessing of a daughter here with me. Im also dreading being around my sister in law and her 6 day old baby tomorrow. I love them both dearly but cant help the way I feel right now.

 

[havefaith01]

Havefaith I really pray you've caught that egg! Is opk still positive? What dpo do you suspect you are?
Aw teeny I'm so sorry af got you hope you are doing ok.
:wave: hey tryingfor1st. Sorry for your loss I know exactly what you mean about having to ttc again. I keep thinking about the fact that my 12 week scan would be next week, that I wouldve had a baby in my arms by Christmas. I'd even bought some bits and bobs :duh: it's rotten to be back at the start, and absolutely terrifying. In a way that's one of the reasons, as much as I wanna just get started, that's probably making not trying this cycle a bit easier to bare.. It puts off the inevitable worrying that will ensue! I feel like I'm contradicting myself a lot just now, but it's such a confusing way to feel - on one hand desperate to try again and to be preggo, and on the other hand terrified. Good luck with your day21 bloods, they will give u a good idea of where u stand.
Nzkiwi I'm super moody too! Finding myself being very short tempered and annoyed at things that wouldn't normally bother me. In fact sometimes I'm annoyed and don't even know why. My poor hubby has been baring the brunt I'm afraid but ive been making sure if I slip into one of those moods I remember to apologise to him and make it up to him. He's fairly understanding thankfully. Glad you scan went well!
:wave: hi Redcat. Sorry for your loss too i have irregular cycles too, and was found to have PCOS with raised testosterone levels. It took me multiple visits to my gp to get testing for PCoS, I'd suspected it for quite some time, and in the end I had to be quite forceful about it. I hope you doctor is understanding and agrees to some testing for you, the hormone testing is pretty simple really and would be a good place to start- just a simple blood test. Some cycles I do not ovulate either which can be frustrating, but I'm not very slim at the moment and I find for me that losing weight has helped me in the past, so I've started a healthy eating/fertility diet to try and speed things up. It seems that when I'm tracking ovulation and do ovulate, that we seem to catch an egg fairly quickly, or have in the past at least, I'm hoping this continues to be the case. Hope that clomid does the trick for you.
AFm I'm getting there!.. Slowly! Hoping to go back to work next week, I'm missing all my friends there, and everyone who knows about my loss has been very supportive which is nice. Hubby is away in a stag this weekend which I'm dreading, but thankfully ive arranged company for the whole weekend so I won't be on my own. I've finally stopped spotting. Meant to dip my urine today to see how the hcg is doing, but I'm hopeful that it's almost gone. Still a bit crampy, and my nether regions (lol) feel bruised.. But I imagine that's fairly normal. Xxx

i am very sorry for your loss! I know how you feel! u would have been 13 weeks this week! My opk turned negative today...I have a long surge....about 4 days. I suspect I ovulate about 24 hrs after first positive. I think I am about 4 days past o! Not feeling too good about it....last time I already had symptoms and I don't have anything now.

 

[havefaith01]

Havefaith, that's great news about ovulating already so soon. I hope you catch the egg. Xx
AFM, I have no idea now if/when I ovulated so I am waiting on AF to appear anytime from now. I have purposely used all my HPTs so I cannot test anymore. I thought I was between 10-14 days past ovulation but I can't be sure. I have been so wrapped up in trying to fall pregnant again that I have decided just to wait it out for AF without all the stress.
I think waiting for first AF will help me have a better understanding of my next cycle and we can work in TTC properly again. DH and I have DTD 3 times a week anyway, so if I did ovulate and it's meant to be hopefully there will be some good healthy sperm there waiting.
I am done with the stress of TTC, it's been a long year and I am trying to relax about the whole thing. The miscarriage gave us weeks of stress and I can't be that stressed again.

How are you feeling Dollybird? Xx

I know how stressful it is! I Am So Sorry you are going thru this. Pray I no yout get your bfp soon!!!!!!

 

[NZKiwi]

Redcat, no need to feel guilty about not wanting to be around your SIL and her new baby, it's a totally acceptable way to feel. I turned down a friends birthday because it was kid friendly and her youngest was only 1 and I felt it would just be really hard, in saying that though I see children all the time for my work and I'm starting to normalise it again, although I do get the pangs.

Dollybird I have had headaches too and yes I also agree it's most likely hormone related. Has anyone had their bloods done? My HCG is still showing at 2000 and I just want it gone as I know there is no chance of TTC until it is. I thought my bleeding/spotting was gone and I got excited but it's started back up again. I think I could handle the waiting for ttc if I knew how long the wait was, but because I have no idea of my cycle it could be as long as a few months thats whats streesing me out/getting me down the most

Anni, it sounds like you are in your tww, good luck!! (i never did tempts or opks, me and DH just dtd every second-third day, considering sperm can live in you for 7 days and we got pregnant first cycle ttc - now all I need is to stay pregnant )

 

[Trying4first1]

Dollybird, yes, I know how that feels, I want to be pregnant again badly too, and yes mostly because the sooner I am, the sooner I'm out of the first tri, it's terrifying to think of what might happen.

Trying4first1, I'm sorry for your losses, I think it's completely natural to be terrified of it happening again, and the negative mindset can be difficult to overcome. You must be an incredibly strong person to have dealt with this twice, and to odds are that your next pregnancy will be perfect and healthy. One of my friends had two miscarriages (it was her first two pregnancies ever) and is now 7 months along with a healthy daughter, I don't know if you find that comforting or not, but it helped me realise there is always hope and that one or two mc's doesn't predict another.

I'm waiting for AF then will start ttc again, but like the rest of you, it brings a lot of mixed emotions along with it, I would really like to be out of the first tri by the time what was my EDD rolls around (Dec 2)

Feeling super hormonal, in the worst mood ever, I think this is positive sign that the HCG is leaving my body or has left it. I had some bloods taken this morning, so fx that it's gone or mostly gone. My scan went well, nothing left behind and my uterus lining is almost back to pre-pregnancy.

Havefaith, I have fx for a BFP for you! Good luck!!

Hi NZkiwi! I really hope that you are right and the odds are with me next time. i would say the experiences have made me stronger as a person and i see life very differently now thats for sure. Ladies who never have to go through this are so lucky and they will never know how lucky they are. It has been a very cruel and emotional journey but I will be so so so grateful for my little one when we are finally blessed.
many thanks for your story about your friend, these give me hope Its lovely to know that life can get better and that many women do go on to have successful pregnancies even after two or more loses. I am so sorry for your loss too and that you find yourself here. The waiting for AF isn't great as I know, but once she does arrive you can breathe a huge sigh of relief. Its nice to know that your body has re-set itself

 

[Trying4first1]

Havefaith I really pray you've caught that egg! Is opk still positive? What dpo do you suspect you are?
Aw teeny I'm so sorry af got you hope you are doing ok.
:wave: hey tryingfor1st. Sorry for your loss I know exactly what you mean about having to ttc again. I keep thinking about the fact that my 12 week scan would be next week, that I wouldve had a baby in my arms by Christmas. I'd even bought some bits and bobs :duh: it's rotten to be back at the start, and absolutely terrifying. In a way that's one of the reasons, as much as I wanna just get started, that's probably making not trying this cycle a bit easier to bare.. It puts off the inevitable worrying that will ensue! I feel like I'm contradicting myself a lot just now, but it's such a confusing way to feel - on one hand desperate to try again and to be preggo, and on the other hand terrified. Good luck with your day21 bloods, they will give u a good idea of where u stand.
Nzkiwi I'm super moody too! Finding myself being very short tempered and annoyed at things that wouldn't normally bother me. In fact sometimes I'm annoyed and don't even know why. My poor hubby has been baring the brunt I'm afraid but ive been making sure if I slip into one of those moods I remember to apologise to him and make it up to him. He's fairly understanding thankfully. Glad you scan went well!
:wave: hi Redcat. Sorry for your loss too i have irregular cycles too, and was found to have PCOS with raised testosterone levels. It took me multiple visits to my gp to get testing for PCoS, I'd suspected it for quite some time, and in the end I had to be quite forceful about it. I hope you doctor is understanding and agrees to some testing for you, the hormone testing is pretty simple really and would be a good place to start- just a simple blood test. Some cycles I do not ovulate either which can be frustrating, but I'm not very slim at the moment and I find for me that losing weight has helped me in the past, so I've started a healthy eating/fertility diet to try and speed things up. It seems that when I'm tracking ovulation and do ovulate, that we seem to catch an egg fairly quickly, or have in the past at least, I'm hoping this continues to be the case. Hope that clomid does the trick for you.
AFm I'm getting there!.. Slowly! Hoping to go back to work next week, I'm missing all my friends there, and everyone who knows about my loss has been very supportive which is nice. Hubby is away in a stag this weekend which I'm dreading, but thankfully ive arranged company for the whole weekend so I won't be on my own. I've finally stopped spotting. Meant to dip my urine today to see how the hcg is doing, but I'm hopeful that it's almost gone. Still a bit crampy, and my nether regions (lol) feel bruised.. But I imagine that's fairly normal. Xxx

Hi Dollybird! Many thanks for your response. I am also sorry for you loss and that you also find yourself here
Like you i also keep thinking about how many weeks I should be etc. I should have been 14 weeks now (see, still counting). Hopefully that will stop soon. I found the week when I should have had my scan very hard but since then life is getting easier. Just like you I hate being back at the beginning again. It is terrifying. Me and DH DTD last night and this week coming will be my fertile window (CD8 today). But I don't feel like i want to have sex constantly like we did the last time two times we conceived. I don't have the energy for that. So, will maybe just see how this month goes without having too much of a sex schedule.
Don't worry about contradicting yourself. This is a confusing place to be in and feelings can vary so much all of time. I am also desperate to be preggo again one min then terrified the next!
Thank you, luckily blood test is in under two weeks time now. Really hope it gives me answers or at least gives me peace of mind

Ps- I know what you mean about having an xmas baby. Mine was due on Nov 7th so would of had a little one at xmas. Lets hope at least that our bellies will be giving a turkey a run for its money instead. Haha

 

[Redcat85]

so guess what? my first af post d&c finally came yesterday morning! so far it seems like any other period. I was expecting something a lot worse, but maybe the worst is yet to come? It seems like its going to be forever until I ttc again since im waiting another cycle! i started charting again and im debating on using opks just to see if i actually ovulate this cycle or not. sometimes all that just seems to stress me out more unfortunately. anyways, hope everyone has a good week.

 

[Trying4first1]

Good you have now got AF To be honest mine wasn't as bad as I thought it would be, maybe a bit heavier the first two days but thats all! Lasted for 5 days like normal but just spotting the last 3 days.
I am using OPKS this cycle as I am curious to see if ovulation occurs. Me and DH are DTD without protection this month but are not going to 'try' as such as it will be just to much after everything we have been through. need to stay relaxed!
Hope you AF doesn't last too long for you

 

[Dollybird]

Hey everyone!
Redcat hope u feel a bit better today. I think it's natural to feel that way after a loss, so don't worry yourself about it glad you af isn't too bad, I'm a worried about my first one too, so it's reassuring to hear!
Nzkiwi hope your levels drop to zero soon. I know what u mean about the unpredictable it's frustrating. My periods are quite irregular at the best of times so I'm prepared for a long wait for my first
Trying4first, I'm not really in the mood for lots of dtd either.. In fact im a bit anxious about it (we've nt done it post D&C yet). I think it will be a bit emotional actually.. And I guess I also worry about it being a wee bit sore? Hope u catch the egg. I wouldn't worry about doing it loads anyways, me and Dh only done it a couple of times the week we fell preggo last time.
Afm finally got a bfn on my hpt! So I guess now I'm just waiting to see if I ovulate any time soon! Debating whether to use my opks just out of interest.. What do yous think? I'm feeling much more myself today. Been doing lots of activities with my little one to keep ourselves busy and it's been great. Im so so lucky to have him, I feel like this loss has just emphasised that fact, and I just wanna bundle him up and never let him go lol. He went into his big boy bed tonight as he has mastered climbing out his cot. Was worried it was gonna be a nightmare to settle him but he was off to sleep after half an hour. Dunno if it will last though, I'm expecting to have a night of disturbed sleep! Hope everyone else is doing well. Xxx

 

[Trying4first1]

Hi Dolly
It's funny how a loss makes you feel in terms of DTD. Just don't feel like it as much anymore. Like you I was also anxious about doing it the first time after the op. I think we did it two weeks after. It was very emotional and I cried my eyes out after. However things did get better as second time round about a week or so later, I was fine. I think it's just getting across that barrier. As for soreness nothing at all you should be ok too as normally you heal v quickly.
Thank you. I hope we do catch the egg but I'm really not expecting it to happen. Wow that's good u fell after just two times that week! Both months I have got pregnant are the ones where I have had sex loads, but the idea of doing that again is just too much hence why I think the relaxed approach will be better for us at the moment.
How are you feeling generally? I feel very sad deep down and get my moments but much better than I was 5 weeks ago. I feel like I'm just getting on with life because I have to if you know what I mean?
Xx

 

[Dollybird]

I feel much better than I had been. I'm still sad but I feel like people will be expecting me to get on with things now, so I'm trying to put it out my mind a bit. Felt a bit sad today as my iPad got an alert from an app I must've forgotten that I'd set up telling me I was 12+1 pregnant. Argh. My scan was meant to be this Thursday so I think I'll find that day tough. I still feel a bit muddled as well tbh. Keep thinking about the whole ttc thing and that maybe if was a sign for me. I feel like I don't have any confidence left in my body to be able to conceive again successfully if u know what I mean? It's all a bit scary.
I also feel quite anxious just blame. Possibly hormones. I feel like I am constantly expecting something bad to happen. I guess it really rocked my faith a wee bit - after my first loss I convinced myself it wouldn't happen again, I was sure that it couldn't.. That the odds would be in my favour of that makes any sense. Kind of like I'd already had my share or grief so wouldn't have any more? But then I had this MMC and it made me realise that anything can happen really- anything can go wrong in life, even if it doesn't seem fair. And that realisation has freaked me out a bit. I'm hoping that once my hormones settle though that they take the anxiety with them. I don't fancy being so on edge like this on a permanent basis, and as my dad always tells me - worrying doesn't change anything so there's very little point in it. Xxx

 

[NZKiwi]

I feel much better than I had been. I'm still sad but I feel like people will be expecting me to get on with things now, so I'm trying to put it out my mind a bit. Felt a bit sad today as my iPad got an alert from an app I must've forgotten that I'd set up telling me I was 12+1 pregnant. Argh. My scan was meant to be this Thursday so I think I'll find that day tough. I still feel a bit muddled as well tbh. Keep thinking about the whole ttc thing and that maybe if was a sign for me. I feel like I don't have any confidence left in my body to be able to conceive again successfully if u know what I mean? It's all a bit scary.
I also feel quite anxious just blame. Possibly hormones. I feel like I am constantly expecting something bad to happen. I guess it really rocked my faith a wee bit - after my first loss I convinced myself it wouldn't happen again, I was sure that it couldn't.. That the odds would be in my favour of that makes any sense. Kind of like I'd already had my share or grief so wouldn't have any more? But then I had this MMC and it made me realise that anything can happen really- anything can go wrong in life, even if it doesn't seem fair. And that realisation has freaked me out a bit. I'm hoping that once my hormones settle though that they take the anxiety with them. I don't fancy being so on edge like this on a permanent basis, and as my dad always tells me - worrying doesn't change anything so there's very little point in it. Xxx

Yes, that fear, it scares me too. This was my first pregnancy, and I'm just worried that because it happened once it will happen again and that this is some cosmic punishment or bad karma or something catching up with me, I said to DH is it because of this...? or this..? I thought a friends baby was ugly, is it because of that? He says, "babes, genocidal dictators have children, the universe isn't punishing you for thinking Michael's baby is ugly" But l keep trying to reason it, even though intellectually I know there is no reason,but that's scarier, if it was because I did something bad, then at least I could control that, but this, there is no control and that is truly terrifying.

I have been having weird symptoms this may be tmi, but this is what these forums is for right? anyway its like really watery cm but with a bit of blood tinged in, do you think this is normal, could it be possible I could be ovulating? Or do you think it's just a bit of remaining spotting mixing with some natural discharge? Should I consider it as 'still spotting/bleeding? It's definitely different to when I was just bleeding, I have never had anything like this before. My M/C was just over two weeks ago. God I want to move on. I thought I new my body before this, I really did, now I'm all out of whack.

 

[Dollybird]

Hi nzkiwi. I like your husbands reasoning, and that makes sense really. But I know what u mean about it almost making it more frightening to a degree due to the lack of control.
Oh maybe it is ovulation of there is ewcm... Is it fresh spotting? I vaguely remember reading somewhere though that after the initial bleed stops some fertile mucus can occur and spotting but it's just the body clearing itself out. Can't remember if it was a thread I read or a website..I will try and remember. Xxx

 

[Teeny Weeny]

I had blood streaked EWCM a few days before my AF. But that was cycle day 31 I believe.
I am currently CD6 and my first AF has been sooo heavy. Not painful in any way just heavy. I thought it was coming to an end yesterday but today she is back in full force. my AF came at 5 weeks and a day post surgery which I didn't think was too long a wait thankfully. Hopefully I will have a shortish cycle this month too. Xx

 

[NZKiwi]

I just started bleeding and passed a largeish chunk of what is most likely placenta, my midwife is concerned as my scan had come back clear, obviously they missed something, which concerns me. I dont want an infection. Having more bloods done on Fri and if my hcg hasn't dropped significantly and/if I'm still bleeding spotting on Monday then more testing for me. I'm reliving everything right now, I thought I was on track, everytime I think I'm recovering my body just starts revolting against me. This feels like the miscarriage that will never end. Why won't it end?