Hi, I haven't posted here for almost 2 years, but though our story might give some hope to someone..
We are a couple over 35, I'm the husband. We had unsuccessful attempts at conceiving for 4 years, including a couple of fibroid operations for my wife. We then went down the IVF road, did all the interviews, qualified and were due to start the antagonist cycle, had dates all organized etc. Then a few days before we decided we couldn't go through with it, mainly because we had a few friends who had several unsuccessful rounds of ivf, and after 4 years of trying we decided that we couldn't go through the same thing possibly as the constant failure to conceive had worn us down and become the whole focus of our relationship.
So we redefined our goals, and decided ok, it looks like we aren't supposed to be parents. We eventually become ok with this, we both have good careers and love travelling, so we decided we can be good role models and influences on our friends' kids and keep seeing the world, which we've done for a couple of years. We actually became very happy with our life together.
On our recent trip overseas my wife got a bit of gastro and was up most of the night. She got so sick we thought we might have to fly home early but the next morning she felt better and we hopped a boat to a beautiful island off the coast of Thailand. Next morning she felt off again, so we thought we'd see a doctor in case it was a stomach infection. Well the doctor asked about her last period and if there was any chance she could be pregnant. We both laughed, but said we'd get a test kit before she took any of the antibiotics. We went back to our hut, and she went a did the test in the beautiful tropical outdoor bathroom, then came back in while calling out to me "Are you sitting down?"
POSITIVE. This wasn't supposed to be possible as far as we thought. I wondered about the heat affecting the test kit. I walked miles in 35 degrees along a track to find another pharmacy to buy another kit. Back to the hut. 30 seconds later, 2 lines - Positive.
Next day we caught a boat back to a more populated area and bought pregnancy supplements and spent the next few days in shock. Good shock, of course. We got home and had a checkup straight away, and it's all looking good so far. We are in our early 40's. She's pretty fit and her doctor feels we are in good shape. We were a couple that gave up on conceiving and honestly were told it was virtually never going to happen without IVF.
Maybe the change of focus is what did it. Maybe you can try too hard. I had the rest of our life mapped out, buy another apartment then rent them both out and use the income to travel the world. Maybe when you think you have it all worked out life throws you a curve..
But anyway, I guess I just wanted to drop by to say it can happen, even when you've given up all hope that it ever will. Now I must get back to pulling apart my man room at home, as that is now going to become a nursery...
Cheers.
Good luck everyone.
We are a couple over 35, I'm the husband. We had unsuccessful attempts at conceiving for 4 years, including a couple of fibroid operations for my wife. We then went down the IVF road, did all the interviews, qualified and were due to start the antagonist cycle, had dates all organized etc. Then a few days before we decided we couldn't go through with it, mainly because we had a few friends who had several unsuccessful rounds of ivf, and after 4 years of trying we decided that we couldn't go through the same thing possibly as the constant failure to conceive had worn us down and become the whole focus of our relationship.
So we redefined our goals, and decided ok, it looks like we aren't supposed to be parents. We eventually become ok with this, we both have good careers and love travelling, so we decided we can be good role models and influences on our friends' kids and keep seeing the world, which we've done for a couple of years. We actually became very happy with our life together.
On our recent trip overseas my wife got a bit of gastro and was up most of the night. She got so sick we thought we might have to fly home early but the next morning she felt better and we hopped a boat to a beautiful island off the coast of Thailand. Next morning she felt off again, so we thought we'd see a doctor in case it was a stomach infection. Well the doctor asked about her last period and if there was any chance she could be pregnant. We both laughed, but said we'd get a test kit before she took any of the antibiotics. We went back to our hut, and she went a did the test in the beautiful tropical outdoor bathroom, then came back in while calling out to me "Are you sitting down?"
POSITIVE. This wasn't supposed to be possible as far as we thought. I wondered about the heat affecting the test kit. I walked miles in 35 degrees along a track to find another pharmacy to buy another kit. Back to the hut. 30 seconds later, 2 lines - Positive.
Next day we caught a boat back to a more populated area and bought pregnancy supplements and spent the next few days in shock. Good shock, of course. We got home and had a checkup straight away, and it's all looking good so far. We are in our early 40's. She's pretty fit and her doctor feels we are in good shape. We were a couple that gave up on conceiving and honestly were told it was virtually never going to happen without IVF.
Maybe the change of focus is what did it. Maybe you can try too hard. I had the rest of our life mapped out, buy another apartment then rent them both out and use the income to travel the world. Maybe when you think you have it all worked out life throws you a curve..
But anyway, I guess I just wanted to drop by to say it can happen, even when you've given up all hope that it ever will. Now I must get back to pulling apart my man room at home, as that is now going to become a nursery...
Cheers.
Good luck everyone.
. So happy for you both, and all the best!
