Were you so will you...

[angelandbump]

When it comes to education, everyone has different opinions towards 'encouraging' their child to learn.

Were you parents strict or pushy which made you resent them so you are going to be laid back or did you respect them for doing it?
Or were you parents too laid back and you wish they pushed a little harder.

And how will this affect how you encourage your child to learn?

 

[smelly07]

My parents were pretty easy going about education and i think i will be with my girls, i just want them to do their best and not put any pressure on them, of course i will encourage learning but in a relax way,
My only rule will be, if they are not in education then they need to be working! and i will also encourage a saturday job when they are 16.
I want them to know work/career is important, they need to be able to look after themselves and become independent and to pay their way and not have to rely on anyone.
I know too many people that still rely on their parents finacially and lots of teenagers not in school or work and thats one thing i will not be encouraging with my daughters x

 

[caz81]

My parents were strict with my education and I very much appreciate that as I have 2 degrees now. I too will be strict with my children's education as I think education is so important. My husband is Indian and in India a good education is really valued and people are looked up to who work hard and do well in school, here amongst a lot of children its the opposite and its 'cool' not to try and fail (I was a teacher so have a lot of experience in this). I want my children to realise the importance of education and value it.

 

[OmarsMum]

My parents were pushy & strict with our education. I appreciated it as it motivated me, but my brother rebelled during his teenage years. My dad didn't leave him alone until he got a grad degree. Now he's 31 & he appreciates it.

I will be taking a different approach. I believe in motivation without stressing on grades. I used to get depressed & scared of my parents reaction if I had a low grade, as I feared to disappoint them.

I don't want Omar to feel the same. This is why I already started to look for schools that work on individual abilities & skills, & that use motivational approaches based on each student personality, instead of focusing on structured learning.

 

[Nibblenic]

I want my daughter to try hard at school and do well enough to progress to the next stage she wants to.
So for example at GCSE if she needs 8 A-C grades to get to the next level she wants in education thats what I want her to get, rather than 8 A*. So I want her to do well enough to get herself to where she wants to be, for her next step. Rather than put pressure on her and have to spend that additional time to do extra well, which is nice but unnecessary.
I want her to understand that although work education is important. You need to take time to appreciate all aspects of life and spend time developing other areas, not only your mind but your spirit and soul. I think that balance is the essence of having a truly happy life, which is what I want for her above everything

 

[Sarahkka]

Education was a big value in my house growing up. And yes, my mum pushed us, I think, more than my dad did.
They also enrolled us in a zillion extra-curricular activities, which were a very important part of my education. I plan to do the same for my boys. I expect them to study music and learn to play an instrument, to try a few different sports for a few years. Stuff like that.
I want to be open and supportive to their choices and their strengths and weaknesses, but I do want them to learn self-discipline, perseverance, etc, and I think those things can be achieved by setting goals and working towards them. So, at the end of the day, I don't care if my kid isn't a concert violinist, but I do care that he appreciates the music and instrument and disciplines himself to practise everyday so that he keeps working on his personal goals with his music.
That's what my parents did with me, and I appreciated the combination of support and "push".

 

[Eternal]

i tend to think we pick and choose the things that we think worked and would work for us with our boys and add new things as new learn new approaches etc.

But generally yes, my parents were strict and I guess we are too, but I am a lot more laid back in other ways too.

 

[marley2580]

I was home educated - I will be home educating

 

[angelandbump]

I was home educated - I will be home educating

Thats great. I am very uneducated when it comes to home schooling so please correct me if I'm wrong. When home educated, does the educator tend to teach at the child's invivudal level or do you stick to a strict guild line?
I wish I was less naive when it comes to home schooling

x

 

[freckleonear]

I can't really label my parents as either pushy or laid back, so I guess they got the balance just right. They provided us with lots of opportunities but didn't force us to take them. They respected us enough to listen to our opinions and allowed us to make important decisions ourselves, such as when I asked to be home educated. They didn't need to teach us about doing our best, having a good work ethic or self-discipline because they modelled it.

I am a very academic and competitive person so I always assumed I would push my children academically, especially in the early years. As it turns out, I am more and more realising the value of autonomous and child-led learning, so I'm a pretty laid back parent. Obviously I want my children to do well so I provide plenty of encouragement and opportunities, but I won't push them to do anything.

 

[marley2580]

I was home educated - I will be home educating

Thats great. I am very uneducated when it comes to home schooling so please correct me if I'm wrong. When home educated, does the educator tend to teach at the child's invivudal level or do you stick to a strict guild line?
I wish I was less naive when it comes to home schooling

x

Totally depends on the family. Some families follow a curriculum while others are more child led (my approach)

 

[patch2006uk]

I love learning, and so does my husband, so we're hoping that our love rubs off on LO. I'm not super fussed about grades and exams, but the acquisition of knowledge. As long as LO tries his best, I don't really mind how 'good' that best is, if that makes sense?

I learned instruments at school, but I never practiced scales and stuff at home. I loved learning music and the technique, but I had no interest in learning scale after scale. It would by super hypocritical of me to push LO to do something like that, that I always hated doing myself.

 

[Lightworker]

My parents were strict about education. This is very understandable as we are African, and in Africa, mainstream education is usually the only way to ensure financial security as an adult. Very few parents, unless they are not educated themselves, are lax about their children's education.

I won't be strict about it mainly because whilst I believe in education and its benefits, I believe more in the achievement of any and all dreams that may or may not stem directly from a successful academic career. I will greatly encourage my children to excel at anything they put their minds to, be it school, or other non-conventional activities. I will not push them though, and will not place as much emphasis on academia as the sole route to success.

At the minute, my DD1 wants to be a clown, so not much academia there right?

 

[Sarahkka]

I agree patch2006uk - above all, I want my boys to love learning. I want them to love the library and love the science centre and love the challenge of solving new problems, etc. This may be slightly off-topic, but one of the big tragedies that has happened to our society over my lifetime is the exponential rise in the cost of post-secondary education. I want to live in a world full of renaissance minds: people who believe in being literate in arts and sciences. Who take courses in philosophy or astronomy or what have you because they are curious about those things.
It is so expensive today that there is a huge pressure to jump right in to something specialized and to get the degree done as quickly as possible. Or to forego university altogether because you just wind up with a massive debt and no career prospects, anyway.
It really troubles me that post-secondary education is moving so rapidly into something too expensive for most.

 

[vaniilla]

My parents were very strict with schooling and they always made sure that we got everything we wanted in our free time as a reward however I do wish they had been more happy with us, there was always something wrong and your positives were never looked at just your negatives and that's really made me want to make sure lo doesn't feel inadequate. We will be strict with lo, we won't tell him what to study, what he likes and dislikes is personal but we will make sure that whatever he is doing is to his highest ability.

 

[Sarahkka]

Lightworker - there are some very prestigious clown schools, actually!

 

[Lightworker]

Lol..I just thought they slapped on some face paint, wore over-sized clothes and danced around haha.. x

 

[smelly07]

lightworker: thats great!!!!

My eldest daughter currently wants to be an novelist so she can 'work from home' home being with us as she is NEVER moving out!

I asked my youngest daughter what she wants to be when she grows up she replied 'big'

 

[Lightworker]

lightworker: thats great!!!!

My eldest daughter currently wants to be an novelist so she can 'work from home' home being with us as she is NEVER moving out!

I asked my youngest daughter what she wants to be when she grows up she replied 'big'

LOL! that made me chuckle!! I like the idea of being a novelist. Drinking endless cups of coffee, spinning wild and wonderful tales.

Your girls are clever..she realized she needs a stay at home job to justify her staying at home haha awesome

 

[Natsku]

My parents were encouraging but not pushy I hope I shall be the same with Maria. My OH has a very negative view of education, schools and teachers though as he was dumped in boarding school from the age of 7, so that might cause some problems