What the hell is wrong with me? Advice needed.

[LarLar]

Hey i've been eating non stop it seems, but while i'm eating i can't help but think of gross stuff that would put me off what i'm eating, it's getting rediculous it's almost everytime i eat something unless it's small but last night i did it with a sandwich and butter and put myself of it. Tonight i had a chinese for dinner and kept thinking of the rice as maggots and insect larvae and other idiotic stuff.

I've to see a new psychiatrist at the beginning of May for OCD tendencies, anxiety and depression and to try stop any weird rituals i have but this is a new one as i've been waiting for this specific psychiatrist's appointment since early january so before i found out i was pregnant. The psychiatrist doesn't know i'm pregnant but i will be telling her/him but i don't understand why i'm getting this.. i don't think i'm having a hard time dealing with gaining weight as i can't wait for a bump and i've always been a small UK size 8 and been petite. I did have some issues at the beginning of secondary school when i was about 13-14 were all i wanted to do was lose weight and end up going on a liquid diet for three days at a time a couple of times a month if i wanted to lose pounds fast but i stopped doing anything like that over 4 years ago.

Any ideas anyone?