What's the top 5 worst things about being a single parent?

[shiawase]

The top 5 worst things about being a single parent? I can only think of one and thats people thinking us single mums have a hard time raising a child on our own, or that we must deserve a medal because of it. It makes no difference wether you are single or in a relationship, if you choose to be a SAHM or go back to work you still dont always get to have a long relaxing bath, or get that hour of "me" time. Being a parent is hard work regardless of your relationship status. I can think of many things that would need a top 5 worst things about...list but trust me being a parent isnt one of them!

 

[BeautifulD]

The top 5 worst things about being a single parent? I can only think of one and thats people thinking us single mums have a hard time raising a child on our own, or that we must deserve a medal because of it. It makes no difference wether you are single or in a relationship, if you choose to be a SAHM or go back to work you still dont always get to have a long relaxing bath, or get that hour of "me" time. Being a parent is hard work regardless of your relationship status. I can think of many things that would need a top 5 worst things about...list but trust me being a parent isnt one of them!

Hear here!

 

[Kacie]

Every situation is soo different.. My FOB is a nightmare!! I thought he was bad when we were together (which is why I left) but he has got soo much worse since I left because he has lost that control over me and is trying everything to get it back. Now I am fighting solicitors letters, harrassment and blackmail because the man can't let go of what he didn't want in the first place. And he is putting a BIG downer on the first year of my beautiful daughter's life because of his obssession.

So he was the worst thing about being in a relationship and now he is the worst thing about being a single mum! Can't win

I'd never have wanted to be a single mum and my reasons for leaving were based upon how the ex was treating me (and LO).. If your relationship is on the rocks then you really need to think things through for you.. it can be lonely on your own but that is no reason to stay in an unhappy relationship. Just don't rush into a decision as life isn't easy either way.. the grass isn't always greener.

xx

 

[xSophieBx]

Every situation is soo different.. My FOB is a nightmare!! I thought he was bad when we were together (which is why I left) but he has got soo much worse since I left because he has lost that control over me and is trying everything to get it back. Now I am fighting solicitors letters, harrassment and blackmail because the man can't let go of what he didn't want in the first place. And he is putting a BIG downer on the first year of my beautiful daughter's life because of his obssession.

So he was the worst thing about being in a relationship and now he is the worst thing about being a single mum! Can't win

I'd never have wanted to be a single mum and my reasons for leaving were based upon how the ex was treating me (and LO).. If your relationship is on the rocks then you really need to think things through for you.. it can be lonely on your own but that is no reason to stay in an unhappy relationship. Just don't rush into a decision as life isn't easy either way.. the grass isn't always greener.

xx

Could of wrote that myself x

 

[MrsKippling]

Every situation is soo different.. My FOB is a nightmare!! I thought he was bad when we were together (which is why I left) but he has got soo much worse since I left because he has lost that control over me and is trying everything to get it back. Now I am fighting solicitors letters, harrassment and blackmail because the man can't let go of what he didn't want in the first place. And he is putting a BIG downer on the first year of my beautiful daughter's life because of his obssession.

So he was the worst thing about being in a relationship and now he is the worst thing about being a single mum! Can't win

I'd never have wanted to be a single mum and my reasons for leaving were based upon how the ex was treating me (and LO).. If your relationship is on the rocks then you really need to think things through for you.. it can be lonely on your own but that is no reason to stay in an unhappy relationship. Just don't rush into a decision as life isn't easy either way.. the grass isn't always greener.

xx

Could of wrote that myself x

and me x

 

[Rhio92]

The worst things:
- needing time to yourself, but having no one to help
- lonliness
- having to go through everything alone
Can't think of anymore

The BEST things:
- Connor is mine, all mine
- I can stay in my pyjamas all day, and no one willcall me lazy
- no one to complain that the house is a mess
- don't get told that everything I do is wrong
- I can look at fit people on the internet when Connor is in bed. And I can damn well text them too.
- No longer have to cope with FOB's moods
- I parent the way I want
- Connor smiles at meeeee. Not some twat

Ooo the list goes on and on. Single mummy, proud and loving it

 

[lal]

Your child being away from you on a regular basis is hard for me. Nobody to help in the middle of the night, carrying a heavy carseat all of the time by yourself, worrying about money, and everything you do being taken forgranted.

But there are definitely more good things, at least in my situation. Not having to explain how you spend money, being silly with the baby and nobody to feel self-conscious about it for, being single and knowing if you meet the perfect person you're free to be with them, making your own decisions about the baby, being a family of 2, laying around for a whole day just snuggling and kissing on the baby, the only other person in your house being your child who thinks you're beautiful even if you haven't worn makeup in 2 days...

It goes both ways.

 

[Rhio92]

The top 5 worst things about being a single parent? I can only think of one and thats people thinking us single mums have a hard time raising a child on our own, or that we must deserve a medal because of it. It makes no difference wether you are single or in a relationship, if you choose to be a SAHM or go back to work you still dont always get to have a long relaxing bath, or get that hour of "me" time. Being a parent is hard work regardless of your relationship status. I can think of many things that would need a top 5 worst things about...list but trust me being a parent isnt one of them!

Agree with this 100%! x

 

[littlekitten8]

I actually can't think of 5 worst things! I won't pretend its easy being a single mum but its sure as hell easier than being with his abusive, controlling, waste of space father! The only thing I find hard is that there is nobody to give me a break when I'm sick.

Now for the good things!

- I get all the good things....his first words, his first steps, his first jump...all of those things all to myself!
- his love for me is unconditional. He doesn't put unecessary demands on me like a man does!
- I can parent how I want to parent, without someone interfering
- I can do what I want, when I want!
- I can spend my money how I please and not have someone tutting at me for spending it all on James!
- I don't have to share my bed!
- I can sit and watch kiddie films with James and not feel guilty about not washing up instead!
- I get all the snuggles and kisses and smiles and giggles and I don't have to share them!

I could go on all day!

 

[Weeplin]

I don't think there are any bad things about being a single mum. I prefer it over having a partner.

 

[JoJo16]

i couldnt imagine having to 'share' alice! sometimes things are hard and theres nobody there to help but the good things deff outweigh all of that

 

[moomin_troll]

also just recently becoming a single parent i can safetly say that its just as hard being a parent when u have a partner. but atleast now i no im the only one who can do things for my boy and i love that i get all the kisses

 

[Joesgirl]

I feel bad for the OP, I'm sure she knows there will be many benefits to becoming a single mom, otherwise she wouldn't entertain the idea of becoming one. I was a single mom for many, many years. From age 19 to 25 with my son and then from age 26 to 33 with my daughter and son. So most of my youth. I just recently got married. I think it's understandable that the OP would want a realistic idea of what to expect. Here were the hardest parts for me...

My first ex-husband married shortly after we divorced at 19. Our son was 1-1/2 when they got together, and although I can honestly say that I did not feel jealousy for my ex, it was so hard sharing my mother role with another woman. The first years were rocky, but we all tried to put our son first and it's ended up benefiting us all. (My son is 15 now) There have been conflicts through the years, but we have been able to get along. This is only because my ex-husband is a good person/dad and relatively drama free. Expect worse if yours is not. My second ex-husband was not and it's hell dealing with him. He's horrible. Truly horrible.

You have no control on what happens when your child is away with dad. Courts don't micromanage peoples lives and the dad has the right to raise his kids the way he wants, without your input. Hard, but true.

Money. I always struggled as a single mom. Some single moms may not, but I did. Child support doesn't even touch the cost of raising a child.

Answering the questions your child will have on why you are not with their dad anymore. Listening to my son cry about missing his dad and making wishes that his dad and you could be together, even though he had been married for several years. Feeling bad that your son is crying that he has no memories of his parents together. ALWAYS telling your kid it will never happen, as to not give them false hope, because everybody has moved on. It's a hard thing for a pre-teen to grasp.

Not having a break or help in the day to day routine. On the flipside of this, I will add a positive. It's very nice having a whole weekend to yourself every other weekend! Even though you miss your kid like crazy, those weekends are all yours to do as you please. Married or together parents don't get this. It's quite nice.

I hope this helps and I wish you the best in all your future decisions...

Sarah