Whom are you planning to have with you during labour?

[Torz]

I'm not sure who I'm going to have this time.

The first time in hospital I had my mum & my partner as we are allowed two birth partners here.

My second birth was a home birth & it got a little hectic. I had my partner, my mum, my two sisters, my niece (who I didn't actually as to come, my sister just brought her) & my brother was here for a short time but not for the actual birth.

My brother came just after baby was born & I then had two paramedics, two ambulance crew & finally two midwives who turned up 45 minutes after baby was born. How my two year old slept through all this I do not know.

Looking back it felt too much, too many people, I felt overwhelmed.

Obviously I want my partner there, I can't do it without my mum there. I can't ask one sister & not the other & if I have a home birth again I really want my oldest sister there who is a nurse. She has had some midwife training when she did her nursing degree & she actually delivered my second son as the midwifed didn't turn up. I'd feel a whole lot better if she was there.

I kinda feel as if I should just go to hospital & have the decision taken away from me, but I really loved my home water birth & there is no guarantee of using the pool in hospital & I really want another water birth.

I have quite a few weeks to decide I suppose.

If I was in your situation I think I would be pretty torn too. I'd probably sit down & have a good talk to your partner about how you feel. Or even better, write it all down & let him read it, that way he can take it all in without arguing back.

If you feel really strongly about having your mum there then go for it. We all want the best support possible when we are our most vulnerable.

 

[Rhi_Rhi1]

My husband, he is the only person i would consider. He is my rock though! He was amazing through the birth of our last baby.

I think it's great you have such a good relationship with your mum though and you need the person that you think is best to be there

 

[MrS. MaBrEy]

There's a good possibility my husband won't be there at all because of his job (overseas...too far to make it before the birth with just a phone call). I think I'm going to hire a doula and just work with my team alone. I don't have anyone in my family to support my during HBAC. I can't have anyone who is unsupportive in my sacred space, and I would never want my mom there to panic and blow the situation out of proportion.

 

[Christina86]

Just my DH.
My parents will come to watch our dd and then they will come to the hospital after. They did this for our dd. Minus watching her as she was the first. However If by chance I'm not indiced this time we will have some people
On call to watch dd. Our family lives over 1000 miles away. So they can't get here immediately after a phone call.

 

[aidensxmomma]

I plan on having my OH with me and that's it. My grandma will be at my house to watch my older children, so she can't be there. And my mom was there for my first and swore that she would never, ever do it again. Apparently watching me in that much pain was just way too overwhelming for her.

For my first labor, it was my ex and my mom. At my second labor, it was my ex and my friend. And my third labor was just my ex. He wasn't a bad support person, but he wasn't that good either.

I asked my OH how he would feel if I could only have one person there and picked my mom instead of him. He said that he would be upset, but he realizes that it's not about him - it's about me and whatever is going to be best for me to get baby here.