Why bother asking if your going to do it differently? Update Huge row! :'(

[sbl]

Lo stayed at my mums saturday night, I explained to her that I wanted bottle to be given first then solids as lo will eat and eat but then naturally won't want her bottle.
I walked in yesterday afternoon to find mum had given both breakfast and lunch solids before bottles. I was a little upset but let it go.

Then I got a lecture about how I need to let lo stay there for a few hours every week as she's so attached to me.

There were a few other things they mentioned and I just felt like I was doing everything wrong in their eyes.

I was so grateful to my mum for looking after lo and really appreciated it but I don't appreciate being told how to look after my child.

I decided to leave pretty quickly as I was getting upset.

Am I overreacting?



xx

 

[missk1989]

I don't think you are overreacting. For a start if your mum wants to have your lo more she should show she can do things your way. If you don't feel comfortable with the way she looks after lo its not going to be any easier to leave them together.

 

[fingers_cross]

no not at all! my family are like this too and its very annoying and upsetting that they dont want to just be supportive and enjoy their grandchild and let me worrying about how to raise him!x

ETA: my family also complain that my son is too attached to me and needs to spend time away from me..hmm so a child that is attached to his/her mother is a bad thing ahhh ok..see i always thought that was an extremely healthy thing! just ignore them..its good that ur little girl is attached to u, it means she trusts u and u have a strong bond. x

 

[sbl]

Thank you girls.

It just irritated me as during the week it was like 25/26 degrees here and my dad had a go at me for having the parasol up on the buggy and for not letting her out in the midday heat??!!

I mean wtf? Don't get me wrong my parents are great but they don't know everything.

xx

 

[xLaura]

I keep getting the exact same thing ATM. My boy is a mummy's boy and he's started crying with other people ATM, but he's at the age where he's more aware of other people and knows his mummy the best therefore it's expected.

So now all I get is 'oh your a mummy's boy are you? You'd better go back to her cause your spoilt'. Grrrrr!

I've just done a rant thread about family saying I should give my baby food because milk isn't enough anymore. He's well too young and end of day it's MY decision.

This is one of the reasons I won't leave him with anyone because I keep getting
'Give him abit, he will like milky buttons give him one' ect ect I dread to think what he will get given if I'm not there.

 

[sbl]

I keep getting the exact same thing ATM. My boy is a mummy's boy and he's started crying with other people ATM, but he's at the age where he's more aware of other people and knows his mummy the best therefore it's expected.

So now all I get is 'oh your a mummy's boy are you? You'd better go back to her cause your spoilt'. Grrrrr!

I've just done a rant thread about family saying I should give my baby food because milk isn't enough anymore. He's well too young and end of day it's MY decision.

This is one of the reasons I won't leave him with anyone because I keep getting
'Give him abit, he will like milky buttons give him one' ect ect I dread to think what he will get given if I'm not there.

Milky buttons?? Really at 4 months?? I don't know if people think before the talk at all sometimes.

 

[xLaura]

I keep getting the exact same thing ATM. My boy is a mummy's boy and he's started crying with other people ATM, but he's at the age where he's more aware of other people and knows his mummy the best therefore it's expected.

So now all I get is 'oh your a mummy's boy are you? You'd better go back to her cause your spoilt'. Grrrrr!

I've just done a rant thread about family saying I should give my baby food because milk isn't enough anymore. He's well too young and end of day it's MY decision.

This is one of the reasons I won't leave him with anyone because I keep getting
'Give him abit, he will like milky buttons give him one' ect ect I dread to think what he will get given if I'm not there.

Milky buttons?? Really at 4 months?? I don't know if people think before the talk at all sometimes.

Yeah "it's white choc babies like white choc - it's nice for them"
That's all I get all the time, every time they say 'he had milky buttons yet?'
They even bought some to keep at there house for the 2 boys. Every time they try give my boy one and I'm like 'NO thank you!'

 

[sbl]

Hi girls so just to update this I called to see my mum today after she started going on to my nephew about how I was every parents worst nightmare as a teenager and I was up to all sorts I got really pissed off.

I picked lo up and put her in her buggy. Mum called me from the kitchen to come back and kept at it and asked why I was taking it so badly.

I then exploded ant told her how annoyed I was about how she treated me Sunday and I asked her why she didnt stick to lo's routine?

She roared into my face that If lo was going to be there that she was going to
do things her way that was that!!
I roared back at her that she's not your child she's mine and if I ask you to do something while you have her please do it this way.
I'm so upset, having a good cry as I type.

 

[CandyDay]

I think you need to tell her that if she won't do things your way then you won't leave LO with her. Especially after a comment like that "I will do things my way in my house". I wouldn't leave my LO with anyone who wouldn't follow my instructions. The is no good reason why she can't give a bottle before solids to me that is something pretty silly for her to argue about and not do as you ask.

Yes I would know some spoiling would occur but within reason. And milky buttons at 4 months old is not within reason.

 

[MumToEva]

Hey Hun. My mum looks after my LO one day a week for me, and to be honest I just trust her to look after Eva for me in her own way rather than always doing things my way, as I figure she had 3 kids of her own and did fine. I also figure it helps Eva to be more flexible if she has to cope with different people doing things differently, rather than being dependent on a very set routine. I don't ask her about the little details of how she looked after Eva on her days, but I ask her for advice on things at times and at times she asks me. I'm not sure how I would handle things if she was blatantly doing things I didn't want her to, but I find a relaxed attitude works well for us.

Maybe it will come down to not having your mum watch her if you don't agree with how she does things and you can't reach a middle ground?

 

[randomrach]

Hi girls so just to update this I called to see my mum today after she started going on to my nephew about how I was every parents worst nightmare as a teenager and I was up to all sorts I got really pissed off.

I picked lo up and put her in her buggy. Mum called me from the kitchen to come back and kept at it and asked why I was taking it so badly.

I then exploded ant told her how annoyed I was about how she treated me Sunday and I asked her why she didnt stick to lo's routine?

She roared into my face that If lo was going to be there that she was going to
do things her way that was that!!
I roared back at her that she's not your child she's mine and if I ask you to do something while you have her please do it this way.
I'm so upset, having a good cry as I type.

Sorry but if my mum told me she'll do what she likes with my child because she was watching her she would never be left alone with her again. It's no big deal in my eyes if lo at 9 months gets a couple if milky buttons or goes to bed late but I wouldn't leave her with someone who just doesn't care what I think

 

[sbl]

There was only one real thing I asked her to stick to and that was to give lo her bottle before her solids and she didn't. Resulting in lo not drinking much formula all day. I don't mind the little things but this is a huge thing for me.
Don't get me wrong my mother is a great woman and did a great job raising us but if I ask you do stick to one thing then I think thats fair.

 

[randomrach]

The formula thing would irritate me with a baby that's not long been weaned simply because they're not yet used to digesting it very well and not drinking enough can cause major constipation. It is something that's important so it should be stuck to.