Why do our bodies play tricks on us?

[Peach]

Hello Everybody

For thoughs that dont know me I am Rachel AKA Twinks I am 25 and have been with my partner for 4 1/2 years (we have been engaged for 2 weeks ) I am in wtt because atm we live with OH Mum, Dad and brother due to relocating in November last year, money and weight (I am 5ft 9 and weigh in at 16 stone 3 and would like to lose 5 stone)

I came of Cerazette in September last year as I felt I had been on a number of diffrent bcp's and my body needed a break and to get back to "normal" it took until May this year for my cycles to become regular!

I have 1000 emotions running through my head today! I am on Day 38 of what should be a 31 day cycle! I have done a test and it was a I didnt think this would bother me as the timing aint right for us to bring a baby in to this world! The reason I tested is because I thought I was having symptoms, large amoutnts of watery CM, headaches, niggles, feeling sick, bloatedness and backacke? The last few days have made me realise just how much I want a baby I dont want to wait over two years like I planned! Seeing the this morning brought me down to tears and I feel alone! OH doesnt seem to understand where I am coming from in less than a week we have gone from WTT, NTNP and now were not going to have sex as that is the only thing that is 100% at stopping pg! I refuse to go back on the pill as I think it messed me and my body up so much!

We spoke in the week OH said the would be happy with what ever the result was and told me to stop worrying he will be there for me, he told me that he didnt want us to wait to try he but he also didnt want to activly try so we talked and went to "ntnp" now hes like I dont know what I want, you are being silly to think it would of been a good idea to try bla bla bla!

I really dont know what he is thinking right now and his words have really hurt me I told him how I felt I opend my heart and I feel let down! I compleatly understand what he is saying about the timing living with his mum and dad aint perfect, but I just needed some sorta date to work towards look forward too?

Now I have just got to sit and wait for the day af shows her face and have to tart my cycles all over again! I hate my body! If she had shown on time like she should I wouldnt be feeling like this! There is no reason for her to be late! I dont think I have been stresses or anything?

AHHHHHHHHHHHHH

I really dont know what the point of this thread is but I just needed to vent

Love and hugs

Twinks

 

[thompsonic]

Ahh hun
I haven't really got any advice for you but I know how you feel. Lately I've been getting PMS symptoms a few days before AF and every month I'm all argh, what if I'm pregnant, wanting to test then AF comes and I feel sooo upset and OH doesn't understand why and neither do I because I don't want to get pregnant right now!
There was not really any point to me writing all that but I guess the gist is, you are not alone!

Hope you feel better soon xx

 

[apple_20]

guys can be so confusing my OH was similar to thins after my mc so i was WTT, NTNP now he really wants a baby and we are TTC! guys think very practicly so he will need to get his head around the idea but he will come around when he can picture it.
It's such a shame they dont understand the physical longing we have to them it's less real x

 

[rachelrhin0]

So sorry. Our bodies can really do some emotional damage when we least expect it.

 

[Peach]

Thanks Girlies!

I now have brown spotting so looks like she is on her way

 

[lovehearts]

I know how you feel - i was in your position a few weeks ago. I was pretty sure i was pg, had all the signs and over a week late for af! I did several tests all BFN. OH was really supportive when i was testing, it wouldnt have been the right time for us but we would have managed!! The witch showed up eventually and i was in bits - cried on and off all night - OH couldnt understand why it had affected me so much. After that incident we booked a holiday to have something to aim for. A week or so later he told me we could TTC on holiday. I think men just need time to adjust their brains to a diffrent way of thinking - to us having children is all we have ever wanted - most of us in WTT feel the same, a great sense of longing for a baby but circumstances but us in this section.
I know it hurts and nobody can take the pain away from you. My advice is Chin up - you know one day it will be your turn and you will move over to TTC. be open and honest with your oh as you are and im sure he will come round.



xxx