Will I ever enjoy being pregnant?!

[ettegirb21]

I'm almost half way through this pregnancy, but still have many bad days. I see a therapist to help me through, but I still think often about my previous losses. I get sad thinking about them and who they would have been. I find myself getting nervous about every little thing with this pregnancy....if I feel a weird pain, or if he isn't moving all the time....I am trying to enjoy it, but just can't get past what happened.

Does anyone else still feel this way? Does it get better?

I love my little one so much and I feel guilty for feeling this way, when I should be over the moon. I guess what it comes down to is that I am afraid I will lose this one, too. I am already emotionally invested, but I think I am trying to keep my guard up- just in case.

 

[hb1]

Don't think you're alone at all. I have had good and bad days all the way through - moments of panic and monents of joy and excitement.

I think I am leaning more towards happiness the further I go on - as he does move more now which helps but the quiet days I spend fretting.

When you do have a moment of happiness really cherish it as being PAL means that you will worry. Remember you deserve to enjoy it - it really is a wonderful thing

hx

 

[humblebum]

I think it's perfectly normal to worry all the way through, especially when you've suffered a loss. I worried all the way through my first one and it only went away when he was born. The kicks you feel help (unless you have a lazy one like Alex was who didn't wriggle much!) Big hugs, pregnancy is just hard work! xxx

 

[marnie79]

hi hun, ((hugs)) i think the problem is when u have suffered a loss regardless of what stage there is always gonna be that worry, the innocence that everything will be ok has now gone and all we have left is the hard truth and that is that things can and do go wrong and not just to other people, it can happen to us ((cry)) im not enjoyoing this pregnancy very much, im always worrying about what may happen, im scared im gonna have to bury another baby, im just taking it day by day and setting targets to get to, my next one is to get to v day which is now only 5 days away, at least then i know this little one has got a chance iukwim.
I really hope u can find some enjoyment out of ur pregnancy, treasure all those little moments, and hopefully it will fly by and all the worry will be for nothing, xxx

 

[AfterAbigail]

Its probably not the right answer - but I dont think you will enjoy this or any future pregnancies. If you're like me - you will have little pockets of happiness and hope in between moments of panic. I try to not think too far ahead - try and think one day at a time. It helps a little. Its not fair that this is how it will be - but how pregnancy might be just a means to an end. I hope i'm not been too negative. Just well my personal experience is quite negative - there isnt a time that I wll feel safe as we lost our firstborn during full term labour - all I hope is that we bring our babies home happy and healthy!

 

[ettegirb21]

I am sorry to hear that others feel the same way. It's such a miserable way to spend what should be the most enjoyable 9 months of our lives. I will keep you all in my prayers. I pray that we get through this pregnancy and each have beautiful, healthy babies.

 

[cgweegee]

I would have to agree. I am so happy to be pregnant but I can't say that I've truly enjoyed the experience. I am just now getting to the point where I can relax a little and feeling him kick everyday has helped but I still have good and bad days.