Will she be expected to call her auntie?

[Sparky0207]

As some of you may know, I absolutely HATE my BIL's GF with a passion - its a mutual feeling!
BIL is really excited about being an uncle but his GF said something over the weekend that made me think. She said 'I didnt realise id be an auntie so young'. I do not want my little girl calling her auntie. If they were married it would be different but they are not. Similarly, I dont expect their child to call me auntie.
I spoke to MIL about this and she said my LO will have to call her auntie because BIL's GF wants her to, but theirs wont have to call me anything because it doesnt bother me. WTF?
Do I get a say in this or am I being childish?

 

[Blah11]

Um, no. They're not married, that's awkward. If they split up your baby won't have an 'auntie' anymore. It's upto you, just have a quiet word with your BIL, I'm sure he'll understand.

 

[Ema]

You have a say....maybe have a word with you BIL XxxX

 

[Sparky0207]

It might be different if she took an interest in my LO, but she doesnt! Its not like she would be the doting auntie!
She said she was ugly and looked like chucky from that film when she saw the 4d pics
She also said she didnt want people to know our kids will be related

 

[enigma]

Omg, tell her if she thinks so little of her, why should she call her auntie.
If anyone said my kids were ugly, omg hell hath no fury, im tellin ya, lol.

 

[Aidan's Mummy]

As some of you may know, I absolutely HATE my BIL's GF with a passion - its a mutual feeling!
BIL is really excited about being an uncle but his GF said something over the weekend that made me think. She said 'I didnt realise id be an auntie so young'. I do not want my little girl calling her auntie. If they were married it would be different but they are not. Similarly, I dont expect their child to call me auntie.
I spoke to MIL about this and she said my LO will have to call her auntie because BIL's GF wants her to, but theirs wont have to call me anything because it doesnt bother me. WTF?
Do I get a say in this or am I being childish?

its up to you hunni. and if she hasnt taken an interest in the pregancy then why should she be called auntie. i mean my nieces and nephews call my fiance unlce james but we are engaged and he is the father to their cousin so he is kinda more loinked to them then your BIL's GF. i dont think she has a right to be called auntie. but its your descion. mabey have a quite word with BIL and see what he thinks. Just telk him you dontg want the baby getting attached to his GF as 'Auntie' becuase if them two split up it would affect the bubba. he cant argue with that can he. hope everything works out for you hunni.
xx

 

[Sarah88]

They probably won't even still be together when your LO is up to talking (fingers crossed for you anyway). But I think your bub will call her whatever you want her to, so just tell it (sorry, unsure of gender) to call her by her name. It's your child afterall.

 

[Sparky0207]

its up to you hunni. and if she hasnt taken an interest in the pregancy then why should she be called auntie. i mean my nieces and nephews call my fiance unlce james but we are engaged and he is the father to their cousin so he is kinda more loinked to them then your BIL's GF. i dont think she has a right to be called auntie. but its your descion. mabey have a quite word with BIL and see what he thinks. Just telk him you dontg want the baby getting attached to his GF as 'Auntie' becuase if them two split up it would affect the bubba. he cant argue with that can he. hope everything works out for you hunni.
xx

Thats the prob - they are engaged (although apparently never getting married) and they are expecting their first child too so she is saying she is family. Its so confusing
xx

 

[Carolyn]

word of warning ( i've been here before!!!) the more the evil B***h knows you're bothered about the 'auntie' status, the more she'll push for it. Pretend that it really doesn't bother you, i tried this and it worked to a degree. the first time i referred to the girl by her name rather than aunite and her name, i just explained (really loudly) that i'd always assumed to be an auntie you'd be married to my bro/sis and then when she was all embarrassed i said something really evil like - her name didn't really sound like it WENT well with auntie and i'd leave it up to my little one when she could talk as to what she'd call her (bitch from hell has a nice ring to it??)...(i'm a cow when pushed into a corner! People should learn!)

 

[Sparky0207]

Omg, tell her if she thinks so little of her, why should she call her auntie.
If anyone said my kids were ugly, omg hell hath no fury, im tellin ya, lol.

I know! I could have shot her when she said that - luckily MIL and SIL heard and both had a go at her for being so rude so I thought it best to keep my mouth shut. Last laugh and all!

 

[o0oCharlieo0o]

they are not married so no she isnt an auntie to your baby! it would be a little different if they were married and even then you would have a say if you didnt want her to be called auntie!!

 

[Sparky0207]

Thanks Carolyn - think I will try this one!
Her name doesnt go well with auntie actually... now that im thinking about it!
I will leave it up to my daughter - im sure by the time shes speaking they will have split up anyway! Either that or she could call her what we call her!! (Note to Sparky - must not encourage swearing at a young age...)

 

[leedsforever]

I dont agree some of the other comments about because they are not married.. I dont think marriage makes someone family nor does it mean they are anymore likely to stay together!!
Especially as she is also expecting ... !! Its a tricky one... is there no way you can sort out your differences!??!
I get on well with my SIL but I never expected her child whose now 1 to call me "Auntie" although me and OH have been together 4 years! But now Im expecting too its almost like we are more family... if you get what I mean!! So I am auntie Kerry !!
But I know how hard it is to not like family partners etc.... my ohs mum and dad have both new partners!! And there is NO WAY they will be a nan and grandad!!
I hope it works out hun!!

 

[Aidan's Mummy]

Thats the prob - they are engaged (although apparently never getting married) and they are expecting their first child too so she is saying she is family. Its so confusing
xx

then when bubba is born dont reffer to her as auntie and then bubba wil just call her by her name. and if she asks why she is called auntie just say. i didnt realise you wanted to be called auntie or something
xx

 

[Sparky0207]

Thanks Kerry. Unfortunately I cant see us sorting out our differences - its a really long complicated story but basically she used to be my best friend, then she was trying it on with my OH behind my back, then ended up hooking up with his brother and has been a complete bitch to me for the past 3 years! Long gone are the days when I tried to get on with her! Ive realised it is a lost cause!
OH really wants their baby to call me auntie, but it isnt something that bothers me either way. When we get married next year though I do think it will be more appropriate but again it wouldnt bother me if it didnt happen.
If she was interested in my LO then it would be different even though we dont get on, but when we passed the scan pics around she didnt want to look and all she has done is made horribly rude comments about me and my LO throughout the pregnancy.
Its a tough one, even more so because MIL expects her to call her auntie!

 

[Aidan's Mummy]

Thanks Kerry. Unfortunately I cant see us sorting out our differences - its a really long complicated story but basically she used to be my best friend, then she was trying it on with my OH behind my back, then ended up hooking up with his brother and has been a complete bitch to me for the past 3 years! Long gone are the days when I tried to get on with her! Ive realised it is a lost cause!
OH really wants their baby to call me auntie, but it isnt something that bothers me either way. When we get married next year though I do think it will be more appropriate but again it wouldnt bother me if it didnt happen.
If she was interested in my LO then it would be different even though we dont get on, but when we passed the scan pics around she didnt want to look and all she has done is made horribly rude comments about me and my LO throughout the pregnancy.
Its a tough one, even more so because MIL expects her to call her auntie!

oh and techinally she is your BIL's gf not your brothers or sisters. so she dosent actually have the right to be a caled autine. especially if she tried it on with your OH i wouldnt let the lil bitch near me. OH or the baby. i fink she has gotsome cheek expecting to be called auntie. i can see why you hate her lol
xx

 

[leedsforever]

gosh she sounds like a joy ....!!!

Maybe she wont expect to be called auntie but I agree if my SIL wasnt interested and I wasnt interested in her LO!! Then we wouldnt refer to each other as family!!

Hope everything works out well

 

[enigma]

Well when we was growing up, we has an auntie that we dident like and she was labled anti social, was so funny when i called it her to her face, i was only little though.

 

[Sparky0207]

Well when we was growing up, we has an auntie that we dident like and she was labled anti social, was so funny when i called it her to her face, i was only little though.

I wont tell you what we call this one!!

 

[CrystalBell]

The way I see it is it's your baby/child you tell him/her what to call her. I have an aunt ( through marriage who my mother can't stand and neither can I for that matter) and she expects me to call her Mum ( i know!!!) needless to say I call her by her name.