Will the midwife think im bonkers?

[mrsp14]

...if i say i dont want to be checked when in labour.

Unless its all taking stupidly long i dont want any checks for dilation.

When i had dd i was checked and everytime it hurt... and i was disheartened at how long it took.... 2 days to get from 3-5cm!!! Id rather not this time... i knew instincively when to push last time.. despite th emidwife telling me not too as 10 mins before i'd been 8cm... not sure it would have even been possible to ignore my need to push and im glad i went with my body. So i figure going off that i wont need checking.

Are they going to think im some bonkers hippy type or is it pretty common to request no checks?

 

[ZoeZo]

I was thinking exactly the same! Are they going to think I'm some awkward one for refusing VE's. As it says on the Mamabirth blog, the baby stills comes out even if you don't have VE's.

I think it'd just interfere having people hurt and poke around in there, there are other ways of telling apparently - a purple line appears from your bottom and travels up your bottom cheeks further the more dilated you are, things like not being able to concentrate on conversation during contractions, I'll have to find a link.

I'm banking on 'knowing' when my body tells me it's time to push too

 

[Freya]

I requested no checks, only an initial one to gauge where I was when the midwife first arrived at the house. They were absolutely fine...... my house, my rules lol. They would still have to respect your wishes in a hospital setting too. X

 

[mrsp14]

I definitely knew when to push as mid contraction my body pushed involuntarily!!! I hadn't expected it all so it really caught be off guard!! I figure it's a good sign that I was ready tho!!!

 

[booflebump]

There are a lot of reasons to avoid VE's as much as possible - so refusing altogether isn't that 'out there'. They may try to tell you they NEED to check - but they don't at all - stick to your guns

xxx

 

[Mervs Mum]

Very common to decline VEs when home birthing

 

[disneyleanne]

I don't think I will decline but I certainly don't want to be checked loads of times and definitely not when I'm in "the zone." I also want the midwives to use positive language, I don't want to be told I'm "only" this or "still" that.

 

[mrsp14]

Very common to decline VEs when home birthing

I think I'll decline even if I don't get a hb!!!
Maybe let them check when I get there to make sure I'm not 1cm but after that hands off!!

 

[Mervs Mum]

I think it's important to understand why VEs are not always a good idea. It's much more than being uncomfortable or feeling disturbed. They are an intervention that can lead to more interventions. Once you've had one you can't 'unknow' what they think they have established and you effectively set a stopwatch going......