Worried about excitement and bonding

[superfrizbee]

Hi everyone, I'm 15 weeks into this pregnancy, my third baby. This last week I've been moving passed the nauseous and shattered stage (not fully, but loads better). I guess now I feel like I should be more excited. This baby is very wanted but I have a lot going on at the moment and I have very little time to think about pregnancy or the baby. We need to organise an extension and a new car. I'm not yet feeling movements. I guess I just worry that with all of this going on I'm going to miss out on the excitement of this pregancy. I'm also intending on staying team yellow after finding out the gender with both of my other two children. I'm worried this will stop me bonding as closely with this baby before he/she is born. I'm also scared as to how I'll cope with three and when I do have time to dwell on the baby my thoughts always come back to this. Why am I like this? Any advice to please help me enjoy this pregnancy?

 

[AshLMT]

No advice other than I feel the same way as you mama. With my first, I felt so connected from the get go and felt it only intensified once I found out we were expecting our daughter and began feeling movements. This time around, I just feel so disconnected and I feel awful about it. I remember just sitting and looking at the ultrasound pics with my daughter and this time, while I'm excited for my son to get here, I'm just not feeling the same. I try to keep telling myself this is normal and keep my chin up and not stress it as I'm sure it's gotta change once he's here.

 

[2much]

Sorry I have no advice, I feel pretty similarly actually. I feel some excitement and some bonding, but I am not awestruck like I expected to be. I sometimes worry something is wrong with me, lol. I think it will come, but I really don't know since this is my first. Good luck- and hugs.

 

[LavenderLove]

Honestly it's perfectly normal. Everyone feels differently about each pregnancy! Both pregnancies I've had have followed this feeling: It's felt neat to feel baby move around and know there's a little life in you, but I wasn't over-the-moon excited or awestruck or anything.

Turns out bonding and closeness for me happen over time, and that's normal! I had an intense drive to care for my daughter from the beginning even though there wasn't this magical, overwhelming love and warm fuzzies everyone was promising I'd have. That just came later.

 

[broodymrs]

I was the same. During my pregnancy I was really ill and had a lot going off in my life. It was a high risk pregnancy too which was stressful and I didn't do any of the pre baby bonding they recommend like talking to your bump. But honestly once he was here it didn't matter a bit. I had a lovely birth and bonded immediately and he's fitted right in to our little family. So no advice as such other than trust it will be ok

 

[Savasanna]

This feeling comes and goes with me. The peanut we're caring for has been going through a particularly difficult sleeping pattern lately, and the other day I had a full on break down a la "I can't believe we're about to start this all over again in September". This baby was very planned and desperately wanted. Sometimes I think it's just difficult to have this giant countdown to when your life is going to become more complicated/chaotic.

 

[lilmisscaviar]

I think keeping busy is a good idea, otherwise milestones can't seem to come quick enough and pregnancy seems to drag on. I really want to go team green this pregnancy but DH wants to know. I wanted to know with my first two but since baby #3 was our tiebreaker I didn't want to know however DH did and so we had an early gender scan to find out. This time I think I'm just going to turn away and have them put the "bits" in an envelope that way if I want to find out later, I can, but if not then at least I won't have to know. I personally find waiting until birth funner that way, like waiting until Christmas to open a present.