Mrs Doddy
1 pink 1 blue
- Joined
- Aug 2, 2008
- Messages
- 14,217
- Reaction score
- 0
As you can see I'm awake at stupid o'clock ! Not able to sleep I feel like my positive and negative thoughts are at a constant war with each other and I feel like I'm going crazy and that I need to just wake in october and all will be ok.. One minute I'm ok and telling myself that it's all ok , I'm feeling nice and sick, boobs hurt, not bleeding or in pain therefore everything must be ok- h measured my belly and I think I have grown but not 100% sure. The other minute Im telling myself that I shouldn't get commplacent and the symptoms don't mean anything as I could still have a mmc and as the hormones would still be present that I wouldn't know until the scan. I'm also worried for the babys health I pray that all is going to be ok but worried about what if there is something wrong with it how am I going to cope ??? No matter what people say to me to reassure me that it's going to be ok I don't share their confidence, I keep thinking that the bubble is going to burst at any point and my world is going to crash around me- also that IF it does I won't be able to cope as many of my friends are pregnant and due either side of me by a few months. I. Wake up every morning and think I can't cope and can't face work where I have to deal with clients that don't give you thanks for what you do and moan about things which quite frankly on the scheme of things in life and how I'm feeling really doesn't matter. I leave it last minute before getting ready for work then force myself to go in- I've got a job to do and a life to lead dispute my worries. I really hate feeling like this and although it passes the same worries always come back to me every few days and feel like my fate is in someone elses hands and all I can do is hope.