Well, even though I have lost most of my weight, I am still losing those last kilos.
I put on 3 to 4 stone ( 25 to 30 kilos) when I went on antidepressants due to having anxiety (I never was depressed though, the depressing thing was the weight gain LOL)
I have always been on the slim side, long limbed, and my figure was always my best feature So when I piled it on, I never adapted to that larger figure. All the weight was on my tummy, chin and face, and maybe 20 percent in other places. It was so bad that people would always think I was pregnant. Some people look fine overweight, pretty, but I looked bloated, really awful. I hated the clothes I could buy and how they would look. I realized that in general I avoided the mirror. I tried diets, but didn't seem to have the willpower to get further than a stone loss and then put it back on.
I stopped taking those horrid tablets about two years ago, and then I seemed to have the will to lose weight and the metabolism to make it go faster.
The first 10 kilos came off with a diet that was an attempt to lower my anxiety. It was supposed to control blood levels as when they crash this can bring on anxiety attacks. It was very similar to an atkins diets, and I really didn't suit it. I felt sick often, was never hungry, had tummy and toilet problems, and just didn't like the food at all. I wasn't so bothered about the weight lose as I was about getting better. However, the weight did drop, but the anxiety didn't get any better (maybe a coincidence but it got worse). So I went back to eating normally, no diet, and I was surprised I didn't put any significant weight on.
People kept saying and admiring the weight loss I had had, I was also pleased as I was slimmer than I had been for years, but I still noticed my still fat face and very fat tummy. I didn't diet for months though, and finally after about half a year decided I wanted to go back on the path to get back to my old slim me. I did weight watchers minus the reunions and lost another stone and a bit. Now I was starting to look slimmer. I was a size 14 and just in the limit of being a healthy weight (24.9 bmi), and as I am long legged, wearing the right sorts of clothing I could look slim. I again stopped dieting and ate what I wanted for another 6 months, and then just lately I decided I wanted the last hurdle to get to a size 12 and a bmi of 22. I have lost another half a stone, and have about another half a stone to go to get to my ideal weight.
Its great to put on my old skirts and trousers that I refused to throw away. Gradually my stomach is looking not pregnant and my face is no longer puffy with 3 chins to match. Now when I put on the right clothes I can get away with looking almost as if I have the size I want to aim at.
I wanted to lose weight because I never accepted the old weight, because it felt very unhealthy as it was all hanging on my stomach (the worst area for health risks), I wanted to like my figure again, feel confident and attractive, and be healthy to have a baby. Many can look attractive with extra weight, it was not my case belief me, my skin also allied with my fat to make me look as awful as possible.
So now here I am, very near my goal weight, (I will post the final pics when I do so in my famous heart-patterned shorts). On reflection, the weight loss was not "difficult" once I kind of got on the path. It is no way as hard as the path of unpicking the stitches of my anxiety built mind, to the point I feel envious of those who only have to lose weight to be able to TTC. But then again, issues are different for every people, and what was not so hard for me could have been terribly hard for someone else.
How did I do it? I learned to stop using food to: relax, give comfort, as an antidote to boredom etc (not easy, its a life time change) I had a lot smaller meals more times a day. I was determined, at that determination was so strong it just didn't feel an effort (I just didn't want the old me, and it was just depressing to keep going back to square one). I compromised and have never stopped eating anything I like, even if it was less often (only did I do this at first because of the regulations of the blood diet, but that was a mistake). I went back to enjoying clothes and took a lot more time to dress. I had great support and my DH and mother were always telling me how much better I looked.
So just those last 5 kilos to go, get that final fat of my tummy and there you go, a body ready for pregnancy (just need to get the mind to go with it now)
Long post, sorry.
