...you too????

[jerseyshoregirl]

I thought "getting pregnant" was the hard part before I had my miscarriage...and now I realize it's "staying pregnant" that can be hard to do - at least for me, seeing as we got pregnant on our first time TTC.

I feel so naive...and just wondering if anyone else felt like they lost their "innocence" after a miscarriage.

The strange thing is that now, even though my baby did not survive, I still feel like a mom and will be forever changed.

JM

 

[Lizzie Lou]

yep deffinitely feel that way. I'm due to d&c on fri and although I know my baby is gone, is still feel like I've been a mum, albeit for the 2-5wks my baby had lived for. I got pregnant within a couple of days of coming off the pill so thought that it was all going to be so easy! Ha! How wrong was I! I've cried and hurt over this more than I ever thought posssible and I can't even begin to contemplate how hard it must be for those who lose later on. Good luck with everything in the future, I hope it all goes well for both of us xxx

 

[todteach]

I just had to thank you for your comment. This is exactly how I feel. My husband and I tried only that once......we were 3 months pregnant, feeling that we were in the "safety zone". Never thought that this would happen to us. Unfortunately, it did.

huge to you

 

[HannahMontana]

God yes...I am currently 5-ish weeks pregnant but have lost 4 babies in the last 2 years, my youngest child is 2 1/2 years old...still not sure if this one will be 'viable' as hCG only rising by 60% every 48 hours, ectopic has been bandied aaround but too early to tell yet....possibility of a sac on US but hey, don't foget that might be a 'pseudosac' that you can get with ectopics

As you can see, my 'mood' is currently 'worried'...and by this I really mean 'terrified'...pregnancy for me now is nothing more that a day-to-day wait-see...the innocence has long gone

I think pregnancy tests should come with a third option: Technically pregnant...but don't get your hopes up just yet

Sorry I sound so jaded and bah-humbug...

 

[superp123]

Oh yes!! I feel this way too. After my first I knew that I was changed forever, and when we found out in May that we were expecting it wasn't like the first time at all. No shouting it from the mountains at our house, we told our parents and the girls on B&B. I walked around on eggshells and tried to pretend not to worry about everything. It's like being supersticious. I almost felt like I needed lucky socks or something. Then it all went wrong. Crushing!!!
I have to say that this is the thing that burns me up the most, is that I'll never get to experiance a 'worry free' pregnancy because of my past experiances. My innocense has been stolen from me and I can't get it back...What's worse, I feel like everyone I know is having trouble free conception and pregnancies and here I am all jaded and scared. Yeah, I guess I totally know what you mean.
P

 

[Mynxie]

yes. First month trying we conceived. We were over the moon - other people weren't. Thought it was easy - then lost the baby. That was over 3 years ago now, been PG twice more in that time, it just gets harder

 

[jljwf04]

Honey i feel the same way i have had 3 misscarriages one ending in a D&C and now I feel so scared to get preggo we are still trying but i feel like i did something wrong to have this happen I hope everything works out for everyone

 

[shmoo75]

I too fell pregnant 1st mth of TTC. Me & OH were really happy, in total shock and amazment that it happended so easily then, when I was 7wks+4 our world came crashing down and our bubble well and truly burst. I feel exactly the same as you forever changed. I have had my 1st AF after my m/c and am now well and truly in my 1st 2ww of 1st cycle of TTC again! I am hoping to fall quickly again but, I am not holding my breath. I am excited and terrified at the same time thinking about being pregnant again. I have my fingers crossed for everyone.

 

[Loo]

Similar for me too. I thought it might take us a while to get pregnant, but it happened immediately. But then I mc at 12-13wks (just as I thought it was all safe!).

And then of course, we haven't been able to get pregnant again since!

However, I don't want to be miserable and terrified through any future pregnancies...I just look at it that I had a small time of being a mum (and yes, I still feel as if I am a mum too) and that I loved every minute of it. And next time, I hope it's for longer. But if it isn't, then I'll enjoy every minute of that one too.

I am just grateful that I got the chance to be pregnant and if that's all I get, then so be it.

Chin up ladies...we will all get there in the end.

 

[NikiJJones]

Your message so strongly echoes how I feel. I lost my LO end of May. I had been TTC for a year, and when I finally got my BFP, I thought that all the pain was over. How wrong I was! The pain of the MC has been beyond anything I have ever had to go through, and to return to TTC is so awful. Your phrase "lost your innocence" is so true. The number of times I have wished I could just turn back the time to this time last year, when I was just happily TTC, and thinking "Oh: it will happen soon" I cannot count. I thought my BFP would bring me so much joy, but it has just brought me weeks of tears.
to all of you ladies on this forum.

 

[JASMAK]

It is so hard for me to get pregnant...but, that is just one hurdle. I have had two m/c in the last 20mths of TTC. I am trying so hard...and then when, and IF I get that BFP...it will be filled with worry. It's hard.

 

[todteach]

I think that we're all going to be terrified when we finally get our next . Hopefully that will happen soon for all of us. Thankfully, we have eachother to lean on. You girls have been a wonderful support group for me. Don't know how I would have gotten through these last two months without you. It still hurts each and everyday, but I know that I can always come home at the end of the day and vent on here if needed.