10 weeks.

[hannah27]

Hi everyone,

I'm 10 weeks pregnant and i should be over the moon right?

When i was 17 i had a complicated miscarriage at 3 months. Due to after affects of the depo perova contraceptive injection i didn't think my body was ever able to get pregnant again.

10 years later, I moved to Portugal to start a new life and quickly found a man, who i fell for and we became a couple. I moved into his apartment and then that same month i found out i was pregnant.

I always thought if this miracle would happen again i would be so happy. So in love again with this life growing inside of me. But i'm just tired, exhausted, constant pains/sickness..

Its so hot here (summer) and i cant breathe. My family are all back in England. I feel alone.

I'm terrified why i don't feel bonded yet. We had an early scan at 7 weeks and even with the photo and hearing a heartbeat... nothing. I feel like i'm failing and will be an awful mother.

 

[BearClaire]

Oh wow!!
You most certainly are not alone!

I moved to Portugal January 2017 with work, met the most amazing man and surprise I'm pregnant!!

Where abouts do you live? I'm near Lisbon.

I'm currently 26+3 so I've been exactly where you are so would be happy to chat to you through this hard time

 

[Beautiful11]

Hi lovely! You are not alone I recently found out I’m pregnant with twins and I’m having a hard time bonding too as my last pregnancy I was really poorly I don’t do pregnancy well but I adore my two boys I have already and I’m sure I’ll adore the twins to don’t be so hard on yourself your body is going thRough massive changes right now xx

 

[hannah27]

Oh wow!!
You most certainly are not alone!

I moved to Portugal January 2017 with work, met the most amazing man and surprise I'm pregnant!!

Where abouts do you live? I'm near Lisbon.

I'm currently 26+3 so I've been exactly where you are so would be happy to chat to you through this hard time

Thanks, it’s comforting to read someone has been exactly where I am.
I’m living in bensafrim, algarve! (That comes with its stresses though as my boyfriends place is so unsuitable in its current state for a baby - at least in my eye..)

Congratulations by the way and are you excited now?

 

[hannah27]

Hi lovely! You are not alone I recently found out I’m pregnant with twins and I’m having a hard time bonding too as my last pregnancy I was really poorly I don’t do pregnancy well but I adore my two boys I have already and I’m sure I’ll adore the twins to don’t be so hard on yourself your body is going thRough massive changes right now xx

Hi! I’ve seen some posts about you expecting twins! Congratulations!
Yeh I can sympathise with not doing pregnancy well... it’s made me feel I don’t want another after this! But maybe that will change after the end result......
Thank you x

 

[AsheBro]

For some reason I'm feeling the same, I forget I'm pregnant sometimes. I thought it'd be more real after seeing the baby but it was real for maybe a day then I just kind of moved on. With my first I was so obsessed with the fact I was pregnant, but this one I kind of feel indifferent towards. I'm hoping once I start feeling the baby move and I start getting a real bump and getting to the "fun" parts of pregnancy I'll feel more excited. But right now I just feel like "okay I'm having another baby" when I think about it. I also suffered pretty bad PPD with my son and didn't bond with him after he was born for a long time. I loved him but it never felt like a mothers love and I felt awful about it. Luckily something clicked but it took much longer than I expected.
You're not alone

 

[BearClaire]

Oh wow!!
You most certainly are not alone!

I moved to Portugal January 2017 with work, met the most amazing man and surprise I'm pregnant!!

Where abouts do you live? I'm near Lisbon.

I'm currently 26+3 so I've been exactly where you are so would be happy to chat to you through this hard time

Thanks, it’s comforting to read someone has been exactly where I am.
I’m living in bensafrim, algarve! (That comes with its stresses though as my boyfriends place is so unsuitable in its current state for a baby - at least in my eye..)

Congratulations by the way and are you excited now?

Totally understand, the apartment I'm in is only temporary as it comes with the contract I'm on. So at some point we will be homeless (FUN!!). So we can't decorate or really buy any furniture. Which makes it harder to get excited.

As for not feeling excited, I went through this too. I had 2 miscarriages before so couldn't get excited. I worried constantly.
The first 12 weeks were the worst, I wanted to keep it secret until we had the first scan so it meant I was totally isolated. My boyfriend couldn't comfort me as he hadn't been through the miscarriages. Then with being in a foreign country and all my friends and family back in the UK I had no support system. It was a living hell.
It got better when I started to feel the baby kick, but I wouldn't say I'm more excited because of that.

I enjoyed buying clothes, and the pram and crib and I am looking forward to baby getting here (being team yellow is helping lots!).

I think right now, I'm just concentrating on remaining calm and relaxed and trying not to over think everything and just enjoy my journey as its different from everyone else's.

I guess some women don't feel that instant love seeing their baby on scans or feeling them kick, I certainly haven't and for me that's ok, and for you too.

Don't feel bad at how you feel, there is nothing wrong with it. The weeks will go by and you will feel better, and then you will have those milestones to look forward to.