17, pregnant, abortion?

[DaisyDuke]

Good luck!

 

[Serene123]

You will be just fine whatever you decide, aslong as your decision is the right one for you. Nobody else can make this decision for you. You can't get rid because of what someone else wants.

Good luck!

 

[Rachiebaby24]

Having a baby wont ruin your life.....if you are about to start your last year of college.....you are less than 2 months pregnant.....you still have another 6 months of studying....that's means by the time the baby is born you only have 6 months left of the last year of college....which you can do after the baby is born.....all that having a baby is going to do is delay things for a bit.....

As for working/financial matters, things will work out...you can get benefits to top up your wages and help with housing if you get thrown out...you do have options.....many of us have well paid jobs and its difficult so all of us have to work things out..but you know what...they always do somehow!

Think long and hard because you may feel very guilty afterwards (if you have the abortion) but also, if that is your choice then that it your choice.....but it sounds to me like your maternal instincts are kicking in if you are doubting you and your boyfriend's decision.

Also, ultimately it is YOUR body and mainly YOUR life it is going to affect the most.....I know you and your boyfriend are mad for each other but a baby is a strain and can be the making or the destroying of even the most strong relationships....if that does happen (which I hope it doesn't) it will be you left holding the baby so also bear that in mind. It is the rest of your life you are thinking about....

I'm sure you know all this anyway so I don't want to sound patronising...sorry!!

Above all, its is your choice but please do not think having a baby is the worst thing....it will be hard and challenging but it is the most beautiful and rewarding thing in your life to have a baby! They are a blessing!!

Good luck....xxx

 

[moomin_troll]

Sorry but you cant say a baby can ruin your lives, after all its not the babies fault that you werent carefull enough!

If you really want a termination then sooner the better but you cant just do it to please your partner it has to be what you both want.

 

[Serene123]

Sorry but you cant say a baby can ruin your lives, after all its not the babies fault that you werent carefull enough!

Accidents happen.

 

[passengerrach]

dont rush if your having doubts then dont go through with it yet because you might live to regret it yeh ur not really in the right place financially or anything but there are ways around that and if u get thrown out then the council will house u ask your doctor for help finding out all this stuff just dont rush in to anything

 

[moomin_troll]

Accidents happen.

Yes i no they do, my pregnancy wasnt planned but still is no reason to say a baby will ruin your life i think thats abit of a stupid thing to say!

 

[Sarah-Jane]

Yes i no they do, my pregnancy wasnt planned but still is no reason to say a baby will ruin your life i think thats abit of a stupid thing to say!

I didn't mean that in a horrible way, sorry if it came across the wrong way, it's just happened at a bad time with mi fella off to Uni and staying there.
It was an accident, I missed one day of the pill, didn't think it would be a problem but guess I was wrong huh?
I'm gonna talk to my boyfriend tonight and just go through options and what's the best for the baby, I don't think I'd ever have the guts for an abortion. Will it still work out if I'll only see my boyfriend at weekends or will I be able to get housing near his Uni? I just don't want to be one of these teenagers that seem like I've got pregnant for money... I just can't let my baby down now

 

[Serene123]

You're not letting your baby down because you need help. Help is there for a reason.

 

[passengerrach]

any thing can work if you make it work you can probobly get housed near him but if iwas u i would try to stay close to your family aswell i doubt ur mum will kick u out u might be underestimating her

 

[Sarah-Jane]

When will I be able to find out about support? I'll find a full time job till I have the baby which will help

 

[Serene123]

If you go to the doctors they can tell you about help, or if you have a clinic like the lodge or something similar, they can help too.

 

[passengerrach]

call your local council and explain your situation or when you visit your docs ask him/her for advice

 

[Sarah-Jane]

any thing can work if you make it work you can probobly get housed near him but if iwas u i would try to stay close to your family aswell i doubt ur mum will kick u out u might be underestimating her

I don't know what she will be like but I doubt I'll have a head left when she finds out. Think I'd rather be near my boyfriend, knowing out baby's got it's dad, I'll think of that nearer the time though

 

[Sarah-Jane]

I'll go to my doctors again in the next few days and try and sort something out to make sure we'll be ok

 

[TashaAndBump]

I didn't mean that in a horrible way, sorry if it came across the wrong way, it's just happened at a bad time with mi fella off to Uni and staying there.
It was an accident, I missed one day of the pill, didn't think it would be a problem but guess I was wrong huh?
I'm gonna talk to my boyfriend tonight and just go through options and what's the best for the baby, I don't think I'd ever have the guts for an abortion. Will it still work out if I'll only see my boyfriend at weekends or will I be able to get housing near his Uni? I just don't want to be one of these teenagers that seem like I've got pregnant for money... I just can't let my baby down now

Nobody is going to think that - certainly not anybody here! But it's nobody's business where your money comes from - if it worries you, don't tell anybody what help you claim or how you run your finances.

Like Toria said, help is there for a reason - and no sane person would get pregnant for money, as if anything it is a massive drain on your bank balance! You are entitled to financial aid just as much as the next person, if not more than a lot of people, so definitely put a claim in for anything you may qualify for! Once you've claimed income support you can put a claim in for the sure start maternity grant (£500) as well, which you will get. You will be able to get help with housing. Perhaps you and your OH could apply together for housing near his uni?

Honestly, all the best to you sweetheart - I think you are a very brave and mature woman to be fighting for your baby no matter what. All will work out - just wait and see - Things might be hard, but they will fall into place and it will all be worth it once you have your little baby in your arms and your life and heart forever x

 

[moomin_troll]

i dont think theres ever a good time to have a baby me and my OH work full time and find it hard never mind having a baby. Are LO wasnt planned either a drunken "mistake" in glasgow for xmas and new year lol But i think if you really wanted a termination you wouldnt be questioning it and you cant do something your not sure about. Your OH cant just think about himself and wanting to go to uni ect there are plenty of people who are in full time education who still manage with a baby. If your both not ready then you no what you have to do but i think you need to make your mind up and stick to it and get it sorted before its too late.

 

[Sarah-Jane]

Litrally bought a tear to my eye that did Tasha, imagining my baby being in my arms, the scary thought turned more to excitment then, knowing I'm going to be a mum, knowing I'm going to have that resposibility for life, looking after my son or daughter =]
Thanx

 

[TashaAndBump]

Litrally bought a tear to my eye that did Tasha, imagining my baby being in my arms, the scary thought turned more to excitment then, knowing I'm going to be a mum, knowing I'm going to have that resposibility for life, looking after my son or daughter =]
Thanx

That excited feeling will only grow and grow the further into pregnancy that you get: I was so scared to begin with... I didn't think I could do it, but of course, I could! (I was 18) but I began to forget I was a teenager long before I had Anna!

Congratulations on your pregnancy, hunni! xx

 

[Ann-Marie]

Looks like you've made up your mind Congrats on your pregnancy.

I agree with pretty much everything that has been said... there is no right time to have a baby... if you waited for everything to be right.. you'd be waiting a long time. Even the most financially secure people worry about having a child... Babies do need a lot, but things don't have to be the latest model, or brand new. Baby is happy as long as it's loved, warm, fed, and clean.

What I will say, whatever you decide, is please don't do it alone. Tell your Mum, and let her deal with it in her own way. Hopefully she will come round. But even if she didn't, at least you've been the responsible one, and not hidden it away.

Good Luck hun