3 failed IUIs. How do you cope?

[PinkPeony]

I know. I find the idea of a missed miscarriage the biggest mind-f*ck of all. I haven't had a scan in a week and my symptoms feel slightly better and I'm totally paranoid about it! The vanishing twin thing can happen without me knowing it too! I can't wait to get to a stage where I can relax a little.

 

[SashimiMimi]

The thing that made me feel better was when my RE told me once a heartbeat is detected you have a 95% chance of seeing that pregnancy through to term. He assured me my problem was getting pregnant not staying pregnant. I was so paranoid in first tri as I never had nausea and felt panicked at my lack of symptoms.

I remember family announcing early, too. Your comments made me smile a bit as a remember how frustrating it is. My dad wrote an email to my aunts at 6 weeks, told our whole IVF story and then those aunts forwarded it to estranged cousins.

Hope everyone is doing well. Baby Wish I was glad to hear about you doing FET!! We just took the little guy to Vancouver and had a great time introducing him to family. We have always been open about our battle with infertility and only had ONE friend ask us why we weren't octomom or why we "decided" to only have one baby through IVF! People have such misconceptions about IVF and multiples I wish I had a witty comeback to explain my single baby.

Pink I was wondering when your due date is? Since we did IVF a year apart almost to the day, I bet our EDDs are close. Mine was May 19 and my son was born on May 17.

 

[PinkPeony]

Wow! Super close! It was May 15 but the doctor changed it to May 18. (No clue why)... I'm sticking with the 15th bc it makes me a little further along and it's our wedding anniversary.

My dummy of a MIL said something like - maybe it's 2 babies! Or 3 or 4!! When we announced to them. DH snarled - that's not how it works mom.

My doc gave me a 95% of having my healthy twin too after the 2nd scan.... They're all pretty negative about little twin A. I'm back there for another scan on Tues, so we'll see if s/he's still kickin'. Even with the reassurance about twin B.... I wish I had ms! So jealous of ppl that puke lol!

 

[SashimiMimi]

Pink I'm so out of the loop I had no idea there was a concern!! Stay positive, one thing I learned is that there are so many what ifs during pregnancy. I met a mom of twins on here and she was told right up until the end one of the twins had clubbed feet. Didn't end up being so when her boys were both born with totally normal feet. I was told there was the possibility my baby had a hole in his heart. I had to see a specialist and she saw nothing! It was a lot of stress to go through. I was literally worried sick abd it was the only tine i theew up during pregnancy!! I know it's hard but until you know it's a problem for sure, try not to stress. Good luck with your next scan!!

PS. I'm not sure where you plan to deliver, but I had an amazing experience at Sunnybrook. They have an excellent high risk unit and I loved my OB there. I had to have an emergency c section and the nurses were so calming and reassuring!

 

[PinkPeony]

I think I'm at Sinai! I hear there and Sunnybrook are the best!

I can't believe doctors sometimes! They have no clue how much they freak us out! This is why I'm on the fence about doing any of the genetic testing. I'm not sure I can handle the stress! After going through fertility treatment I'm just so sick of getting doom and gloom test results.


ETA: just wanted to say I'm not complaining about this stuff. I know these are pretty great problems to have. Just having trouble with anxiety lately which is all stemming from the extra scanning and monitoring. It's doing my head in a bit.

 

[StayHopeful]

Strawberry and Mav, I had the exact same symptom. It was so annoying because I'd lay there and feel tired, but I just couldn't fall back to sleep. It did finally go away though, I'm not sure exactly when. Now I'm waking up at least twice a night to pee, but I fall right back asleep.

Strawberry, great beta! Massive congratulations, I can't wait to hear how your first sono goes!

Mav, I can understand wanting to wait. I wanted to wait until after an appointment to share the news too. And even though I'm in the 2nd trimester, the idea of a missed miscarriage still scares me. It's been a major adjustment going from ultrasounds every 2 weeks at the FS to just every month at my OB. I haven't been to the doctor now in over two weeks and I just have to trust that everything is still going smoothly, but it's easy to freak myself out.

Pink, don't apologize. This whole process takes such a toll on us mentally, physically, and emotionally. I'm glad things are still going well for you!

 

[SashimiMimi]

Sometimes I wonder if all the amazing technology does more harm than good. My brother and SIL also had fertility issues. After they finally conceived my nieces hey were told she had a bundle of veins in her brain that could cause problems. They saw a netic counsellor who said all was fine. I see so many women getting freaked out for no reason from these tests!

It's okay and completely normal to be anxious. But just remember your body is doing an incredible thing. I was nervous for all 9 months and then even more nervous for the first 2-3 months after the baby finally came! Now he is almost 5 months and I wish I had relaxed and enjoyed pregnancy and the newborn stage more!

 

[Jlh1980]

I agree with sash I had a marker for downs on my 20 week scan then had to do more genetic testing and see a heart specialist. Everything turned out fine but I literally cried for two weeks straight. Then I failed the first part of my glucose screen Nd required more testing which also turned out fine. it feels like the worry Is never going to end! There is so much testing these days that it makes it almost impossible to relax.

 

[Maverick007]

It's clear to me based on all of your stories that the worry will never stop, we'll just always find something new to worry about! I'm glad I'm not the only one. I am learning who I can share my fears with and who I can't because there are definitely some people who don't get it and have no ability to empathize. Not that I'm going on and on, which would be annoying...it tends to be people who are older and maybe because when they had their kids, there weren't so many tests and screenings and monitoring - they just had to wait it out and hope for the best.

 

[PinkPeony]

My mom told me my aunt had no idea she was having twins until she gave birth to 2 babies... Can you imagine? I kinda envy that.

 

[Maverick007]

Wow! That's amazing... I can't imagine either!

 

[Maverick007]

welllp, i couldn't take the "should i? shouldn't i?" thoughts any more so i just let the cat out of the bag on FB...12 weeks tomorrow. i might regret it, but hey, we will deal with it if the worst happens. for now i'm going to be positive! crazy lady is an understatement i'm thinking...

 

[PinkPeony]

Woohoo!!! Exciting times Mav!

 

[StayHopeful]

Yay Mav, exciting! I had a hard time too when I finally let the cat out of the bag, I was afraid I'd jinxed it or something by going public. I was afraid to press the "post" button!

 

[Maverick007]

haha oh so glad i'm not the only one! lol! i was so nervous to post it! i feel relieved now though. i just tried to keep it simple and to the point.

 

[Strawberry13]

Woohoo congrats! Way to make it officially Facebook offical

 

[PinkPeony]

How's it going Nicedips?

What's new ladies? AFM morning sickness kicked in for me this week. Yesterday I had a contractor in to do a quote on my furnace and I'm standing there while he's explaining all this stuff to me, getting progressively more woozy, then while he's mid-sentence I just bolt out of the room lol! I've also been having some vertigo type feelings. This has all just kicked in over the past few days like wammo.

 

[StayHopeful]

Oh no, Pink, that stinks! I hope that it's not too bad for you. Are you going to ask your doctor about meds? It took me a while to find one that worked for me but it was sooooo worth it.

I had a scare last night, when I went to the bathroom at about 10 I noticed that I had just started bright red spotting. I'd gone to the restroom about an hour beforehand and hadn't noticed anything and I didn't have any pain, but I still freaked out and called my OB's after-hours number. She said to go ahead and go in to the ER just to be on the safe side, so we did. They did bloodwork, which evidently came back normal, and also did an ultrasound. The baby looked good and is still measuring big and his/her heartbeat is right where it has been. The ultrasound tech said that my placenta is near my cervix, which could be causing the spotting, and it turns out I also have a UTI which might be causing it too. I didn't spot too much, not even enough to fill up a liner, and it had pretty much stopped by the time I got to the hospital. I maybe had a tiny bit of pinkish spotting while we were there and then a little bit of brownish spotting this morning. The ER doctor told me to take it easy today and follow up with my OB tomorrow, so I'll call her in the morning. I know the baby was fine on the ultrasound yesterday, but I'm still freaking out a bit.

 

[Maverick007]

Stay, that is so scary!! I'm relieved to hear things looked good though. Keep us posted on what your OB says...blood is something you never want to see.

Pink, sorry the yuckiness is kicking in. I hope it stays tolerable for you.

 

[SashimiMimi]

Stay that happened to me twice during pregnancy and line you, I immediately rushed to the hospital. I have no idea what caused it but everything turned out fine. Just take it easy and keep your feet up!!