Thanks so much for the warm welcome ladies!
Melly2: I've heard that spotting throughout an entire pregnancy can be normal for some. I think it's only when it's accompanied by other symptoms (like worsening cramps) that it is cause for concern. I hope it tapers off for you though--seeing red while pregnant is a whole different worry! And as far as enjoying your pregnancy goes, I should clarify: pregnancy is no picnic (last time I was utterly unprepared for all the symptoms--I truly had no idea, as none of my close friends had had kids) and it is totally natural to be anxious, especially during your first trimester. It's bloody nerve-wracking! You've worked so hard just to get here and then you're on tenterhooks at least till week 14…. Between that and the symptoms and hormones, it's a lot. I spent my first trimester of my last pregnancy googling miscarriage rates pretty much daily. I drove myself bonkers. And we were keeping it a secret so I had nobody to discuss it with beside my DH, who was useless. It didn't help that I happen to know quite a few women who had endured horror stories (in my twisted little brain just knowing them made me more susceptible to having my child die too--nuts, I know). I had a tough time mentally last time (major depression, anxiety etc.), so I guess compared to that this pregnancy is a breeze (though tougher physically--not bc of my age I don't think--just an entirely different pregnancy [it's true what they say about every pregnancy being different BTW--for me, at least]). So don't feel like you should be "enjoying it more"--you're still in the hard stage. Things should ease up for you once you hit your second trimester.
Jazzbird: Wow, a birth buddy! I've been told both Aug.1 and 3, so who knows? Doesn't really matter as only 5% of women apparently give birth on their due dates. My son was 6 days late. And even though this is #2 for me, I still wonder whether I am ready! Yes, I've experienced "it" once so far, but every pregnancy, birth, PP period, baby etc. is different, so no matter how many pregnancies you've had, you never REALLY know what to expect, ifkwim… I was terribly freaked out about the prospect of giving birth last time and would wake in the middle of the night thinking, "Holy f___ I've got to push this thing out of my hooha!" The best advice I can give is to go into it with an open mind. Things went differently than I thought (both better and worse), and childbirth was the hardest thing I've ever done, but you feel like a superstar after and I can't tell you how worth it it is. Our bodies are amazing and shockingly resilient. By the time I left the hospital I was calculating how soon I could have another! (Truly.)
And it's true what you say about the worrying… After 1st tri the miscarriage worry morphs into something else and on and on. Preparation for parenthood, I think. Wait till you've got a toddler running headlong into traffic! I think it's nature's way of easing us in gently! But the anxiety does settle down a lot once you start feeling your baby move. That's great reassurance.
Gingmg: Yes, try not to compare yourself. It's a losing battle, as you'll always find somebody bigger and somebody smaller than you. There truly is no "normal" in pregnancy--even for you, if that makes sense. My bump is different this time and I find myself trying to compare myself…to myself (last time), which is also a losing battle. My body is different two years later, having already had a child, carrying a genetically different child etc. But to answer your question, I started showing (not a bump, but tenting my shirts a little) at 17 weeks my first pregnancy and around 15 weeks this time. I had a HUGE amount of bloat this time too though. Your bump first thing in the morning is your true bump. By bedtime I always look WAY bigger (even now, at 28 weeks). And like jazzbird says, weight gain varies, doesn't mean one way is better than any other. Our bodies will just do what they'll do, it seems. Just eat well and you'll put on what you'll put on. I won't get into it now as I am already writing way too much, but I had a really hard time gaining last time (I'll pause here so you can all direct glares at me!), to the point of getting guilt trips and lectures from my dr. In the end I had a good sized, healthy son. But this time I find myself idealizing my paltry weight gain of last pregnancy (despite it worrying my dr.) and have been struggling with the fact that my body is gaining FAR more easily this pregnancy. It's gotten to the point where my OB no longer weighs me and has forbidden me to weigh myself. My dr. says it's not about the weight you gain but how well you eat (within reason--I tend to get anal about nutritional guidelines while pregnant) and whether your baby is developing properly (which they'll gauge via u/s and fundal height measurements).
Agh, sorry about the length of this! Brevity is not my forte.
to you. I am so sorry. But you just saw the heartbeat, usually miscarriages happen much later after the baby has passed. I really don't know anything about anything, but I really hope you are wrong. Maybe the bleeding is like before? How bad are the cramps?
