Elysian1c0
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At 4:30somethingAM I stopped trying to time the untimable contractions, and decided to just go to sleep. I had been uncomfortably, crampy, and having mild contractions for hours, but they were completely erratic and hard to even pay attention to. I did notice that at some point, around 1am, I started compulsively cleaning up the kitchen. I thought to myself Is this nesting? Or am I trying to avoid talking to Keenan? (He'd been sort of aggravating that evening...) By 4:30, I had resolved myself to fate, be what it may, and fell asleep quickly. Just as quickly as I fell asleep, I was abruptly waken by a flow of warm liquid. 5:55am. I thought, first, that I was peeing in my sleep, but when I got out of bed there was a sudden rush that wouldn't quit. I grabbed a towel to wrap around my waist, because I was still dripping, and very tentatively went in the hallway and called for my mother. Mom, I think my water broke. Within seconds the whole house was in a frenzy. The dogs were running around, trying to follow me into the bathroom, Keenan is asking me 50 million questions at the door, Mom is frantically grabbing my hospital bags, Dad is rushing to throw on clothes, Peter Lloyd is asking Is it time?! and yelling something about having a phantom alarm set on his phone.
I am still. My thoughts are nowhere. I am dreaming. I am rinsing my legs in the shower, and I am dreaming. This is not real...yet.
Keenan calls the birthing center, and actually gets a response. They shouldn't be in the office at this time. I tell the midwife that I spilled. She tells me to just go back to sleep and call when the contractions are getting closer. I wasn't having any yet, so we all figured I had some time. Nope.
Not 3 minutes after my parents told me we had to leave immediately because I was sure to start moving very fast, very soon, I started to feel the beginnings of a contraction. And subsequently, I lost another gush of water. But, still not believing there was any reason to rush, I get back into the shower and let the warm water run over my belly. I'm nervous now. And I'm shaking. Keenan is calling the midwife to say we're headed towards the birthing center so we can be in the area...
Fast Forward 10 minutes, as I grip the banister in the backyard, in the midst of my first REAL contraction. It hurts.
5 minutes later, there's another. This one lasts about 1 minute. And then another 5 minutes goes by. Again, a minute long contraction. Another 5 minutes, a contraction. Then, 3 minutes later, I'm having another one. This is getting scary, I'm starting to wonder if we'll make it in time, traffic is moving at it's usual wonderful snails pace, and I am IN PAIN. 3 minutes, contraction. 3 minutes, contraction. This goes on for about ½ hour. Then, the contractions start coming at 1 ½ to 2 minute intervals. I CANNOT cope. When we finally get to the birthing center, I'm already woefully telling my mother that I want to go to the hospital. No one is answering the door, because we never called to say my contractions had picked up, and I am on the ground outside the door, moaning. When we've gotten back in the car to head to Coney Island Hospital, the midwife finally comes to let us in. She had no idea we were coming. The room is not set up for me, the bath tub has not been cleaned, let alone filled, the midwife assistants have gone home (after being there all night with another woman.) They are completely blind sided. First and foremost, I need to be checked. I am 3 cms dilated. This is the most discouraging news, because I'm already in very intense labor and I'm not even halfway through. I am assured that my labor is moving very fast, and that's why it hurts the way it does. So, now that we know what we're dealing with, she's off to prepare the rooom. After laboring on the floor in the waiting room for several minutes, I am finally admitted into the birthing room. There is nothing that can relieve this pain. And there is no pause in between contractions. Agony is the term I would use. And here I was, thinking I was going to have a painless labor full of "surges." Reality hits hard. When I can finally get in the tub, I practically dive in. It's very helpful, but cannot alleviate the sensations, which are now getting stronger. My contraction pattern is an odd one. On a scale of 1-10, 10 being highest pain, the contractions happen as follows.
Slow build to 8, lasts about 15 seconds, comes down over the remaining 45 seconds.
1 ½ minutes pass.
Slow build to 8, about 15 seconds, comes down for 45 seconds.
1 minute passes.
Quick build to *13*, lasts 20 seconds, comes down quickly.
Stillness, for about 2 ½ minutes. I start to fall asleep. I forget to breathe. And then it starts again.
All the while I am told to take deep breathes, and ride the wave to the top. I mean...I just wanted to tell everyone to STFU and get me some drugs, dammit!
7 hours of this. (But, two days later, the memory of the pain has truly faded.)
Well, fast forward again. I'm fully dilated, and it's time to push. Pushing feels almost good, compared to what I'd been going through. But, they won't let me push the way I want to. They need me to push hard. The babys heart rate is falling. And rising again. But then falling again. Lower than before. I want him out just as badly as the rest, but I have nothing to give. I am drained of all energy, breathing is a task. The pain is partially forgotten. I don't have the energy to feel it. They tell me to push harder, and I'm trying, but I can't.
So they transfer me to the hospital, where it comes down to TRYING the forceps, or a C section, and they need my decision NOW. So I opted for the Cesarean. They put me under general anesthesia, and when I wake up, they showed me my baby. 8 lbs, 8 ounces, 52 inches long, born at 2:23pm.
I am still. My thoughts are nowhere. I am dreaming. I am rinsing my legs in the shower, and I am dreaming. This is not real...yet.
Keenan calls the birthing center, and actually gets a response. They shouldn't be in the office at this time. I tell the midwife that I spilled. She tells me to just go back to sleep and call when the contractions are getting closer. I wasn't having any yet, so we all figured I had some time. Nope.
Not 3 minutes after my parents told me we had to leave immediately because I was sure to start moving very fast, very soon, I started to feel the beginnings of a contraction. And subsequently, I lost another gush of water. But, still not believing there was any reason to rush, I get back into the shower and let the warm water run over my belly. I'm nervous now. And I'm shaking. Keenan is calling the midwife to say we're headed towards the birthing center so we can be in the area...
Fast Forward 10 minutes, as I grip the banister in the backyard, in the midst of my first REAL contraction. It hurts.
5 minutes later, there's another. This one lasts about 1 minute. And then another 5 minutes goes by. Again, a minute long contraction. Another 5 minutes, a contraction. Then, 3 minutes later, I'm having another one. This is getting scary, I'm starting to wonder if we'll make it in time, traffic is moving at it's usual wonderful snails pace, and I am IN PAIN. 3 minutes, contraction. 3 minutes, contraction. This goes on for about ½ hour. Then, the contractions start coming at 1 ½ to 2 minute intervals. I CANNOT cope. When we finally get to the birthing center, I'm already woefully telling my mother that I want to go to the hospital. No one is answering the door, because we never called to say my contractions had picked up, and I am on the ground outside the door, moaning. When we've gotten back in the car to head to Coney Island Hospital, the midwife finally comes to let us in. She had no idea we were coming. The room is not set up for me, the bath tub has not been cleaned, let alone filled, the midwife assistants have gone home (after being there all night with another woman.) They are completely blind sided. First and foremost, I need to be checked. I am 3 cms dilated. This is the most discouraging news, because I'm already in very intense labor and I'm not even halfway through. I am assured that my labor is moving very fast, and that's why it hurts the way it does. So, now that we know what we're dealing with, she's off to prepare the rooom. After laboring on the floor in the waiting room for several minutes, I am finally admitted into the birthing room. There is nothing that can relieve this pain. And there is no pause in between contractions. Agony is the term I would use. And here I was, thinking I was going to have a painless labor full of "surges." Reality hits hard. When I can finally get in the tub, I practically dive in. It's very helpful, but cannot alleviate the sensations, which are now getting stronger. My contraction pattern is an odd one. On a scale of 1-10, 10 being highest pain, the contractions happen as follows.
Slow build to 8, lasts about 15 seconds, comes down over the remaining 45 seconds.
1 ½ minutes pass.
Slow build to 8, about 15 seconds, comes down for 45 seconds.
1 minute passes.
Quick build to *13*, lasts 20 seconds, comes down quickly.
Stillness, for about 2 ½ minutes. I start to fall asleep. I forget to breathe. And then it starts again.
All the while I am told to take deep breathes, and ride the wave to the top. I mean...I just wanted to tell everyone to STFU and get me some drugs, dammit!
7 hours of this. (But, two days later, the memory of the pain has truly faded.)
Well, fast forward again. I'm fully dilated, and it's time to push. Pushing feels almost good, compared to what I'd been going through. But, they won't let me push the way I want to. They need me to push hard. The babys heart rate is falling. And rising again. But then falling again. Lower than before. I want him out just as badly as the rest, but I have nothing to give. I am drained of all energy, breathing is a task. The pain is partially forgotten. I don't have the energy to feel it. They tell me to push harder, and I'm trying, but I can't.
So they transfer me to the hospital, where it comes down to TRYING the forceps, or a C section, and they need my decision NOW. So I opted for the Cesarean. They put me under general anesthesia, and when I wake up, they showed me my baby. 8 lbs, 8 ounces, 52 inches long, born at 2:23pm.
