Adoption, I want him back! Update pg 7 Happy Ending!!

[Lily34]

I am so happy right now!
I just got a email from the people that were going to adopt Shawn, I've been emailing them and sending picture. They are now in the process of adopting a 7 month old little girl that lost her parents. I feel now more then ever that this was meant to be!

 

[Cassie.]

I am so happy right now!
I just got a email from the people that were going to adopt Shawn, I've been emailing them and sending picture. They are now in the process of adopting a 7 month old little girl that lost her parents. I feel now more then ever that this was meant to be!

That's fantastic news, I'm so happy for them

 

[bek74]

I am so happy right now!
I just got a email from the people that were going to adopt Shawn, I've been emailing them and sending picture. They are now in the process of adopting a 7 month old little girl that lost her parents. I feel now more then ever that this was meant to be!

I hope it works out for them...

 

[bek74]

SLH..I didn't realize he was with the adoptive parents and they were trying for 7 years. That's very sad for them. I can't imagine what they are going through, but I also couldn't imagine what the birth mother went through as she saw her son being taken away. I agree, nothing should have been planned before he was born.......

Yes, however not holding her son and not taking the time to truly think about what she was doing and allowing her son to be taken was a Choice.
Unfortunately infertility isn't a choice, bring given a baby to love and nurture and then have it ripped from you isn't a choice, it would be an absolute nightmare.
Yes what this young girl went through is terrible but it was her choice and a lesson learnt, but at a price to a very desperate couple.
I really feel the system failed both sides.

 

[SLH]

SLH..I didn't realize he was with the adoptive parents and they were trying for 7 years. That's very sad for them. I can't imagine what they are going through, but I also couldn't imagine what the birth mother went through as she saw her son being taken away. I agree, nothing should have been planned before he was born.......

Yes, however not holding her son and not taking the time to truly think about what she was doing and allowing her son to be taken was a Choice.
Unfortunately infertility isn't a choice, bring given a baby to love and nurture and then have it ripped from you isn't a choice, it would be an absolute nightmare.
Yes what this young girl went through is terrible but it was her choice and a lesson learnt, but at a price to a very desperate couple.
I really feel the system failed both sides.

This is the very reason why I don't want to adopt. I think it may be the only option for me though, and it would be a very devastating thing to go through.

 

[Fascination]

Aw, I'm so happy for you! Your little boy is gorgeous btw :] x

I can totally appreciate how devestating it must've been for the adoptive parents but I don't think that could compare to the pain his birth mother would've experienced. I wanted my daughter from the moment I knew she was in my tummy and had 100% prepared for her arrival, yet nobody on this earth could've prepared me for how strongly I'd feel for her when she was born. I knew I'd love her but this was beyond anything I'd ever imagined and even now, it still amazes me that it's possible to love anyone this much! Point being, the system shouldn't expect the natural parents to be capable of making concrete descions prior to the birth because it's impossible to know how you'll feel afterwards. All it succeeded in doing in this case is causing a lot of upset for both parties which could've been avoided if they bothered to acknowledge this.

 

[SuperKat]

Congrats on your beautiful baby!!!

You did the right thing, don't let others make you feel bad for it.

My niece is adopted, it was a long process, and my brother and sister in law were there in the hospital the day she was born...we all were aware that the birth parents had some time to change their minds and that the adoption wouldn't be finalized for a while...and while my brother and sister in law were beyond excited for their new baby they knew that they could still lose her. yes, they had a nursery decorated, and a baby shower when they were told that they had been chosen and all of that...but they also knew that there was no 100% guarantee that they wouldn't definitely be keeping her until that time frame was up. The birth parents were completely positive about the adoption, and things did work out for them- and my niece is now 3...I can tell you that the last thing my brother and sister in law would have wanted was to keep a baby from a parent that had regretted giving him/her up in the first place. (I honestly can't imagine what kind of person would feel okay about that?)

It definitely sounds like things have worked out the way they were meant to!!! Enjoy that beautiful baby of yours, boys are a lot of fun

 

[young_n_proud]

Congrats on your beautiful baby!!!

You did the right thing, don't let others make you feel bad for it.

My niece is adopted, it was a long process, and my brother and sister in law were there in the hospital the day she was born...we all were aware that the birth parents had some time to change their minds and that the adoption wouldn't be finalized for a while...and while my brother and sister in law were beyond excited for their new baby they knew that they could still lose her. yes, they had a nursery decorated, and a baby shower when they were told that they had been chosen and all of that...but they also knew that there was no 100% guarantee that they wouldn't definitely be keeping her until that time frame was up. The birth parents were completely positive about the adoption, and things did work out for them- and my niece is now 3...I can tell you that the last thing my brother and sister in law would have wanted was to keep a baby from a parent that had regretted giving him/her up in the first place. (I honestly can't imagine what kind of person would feel okay about that?)

I definitely sounds like things have worked out the way they were meant to!!! Enjoy that beautiful baby of yours, boys are a lot of fun

I 100% agree with this. A lot of people are saying how badly they feel that a baby they thought they were getting was ripped away from them. Though I understand that they probably felt a great deal of dissappointment and heartache, it will only be a temporary thing-especially since by the sounds of it they jumped right back on the bandwagon and started the process again to get a little girl. Whereas giving up a baby that you concieved and gave birth to will live with and haunt you for the rest of your life. If you give up your baby you will think of it everyday and probably live to regret it. Whereas the possible adoptive parents will get another child that they probably deserve so much but will not look back and say-"Darn it, the one thing I would change would be to get the other baby."

On another note-I have read the thread and i am so happy that you got your baby back, it is true that I am a mother myself but that only means that I can vouch for the undescribable most intense deep deep love you have for your child. There is nothing like it and no matter how much you try and describe it to someone they will never fully understand it unless they go through it themselves

 

[Raincloud]

I'm glad everything worked out for you- although I know it must have been hard for the adoptive parents. I think this is best for everyone.

For you, there will never be 'another baby'. This is your son, he will always be the baby you carried. To you, he is the baby. To the potential adoptive parents, while I'm sure they love him, he is a baby.

You and your son need each other, you love each other. The baby girl, who has lost her parents, needs this wonderful couple to give her the home she deserves.

 

[louandivy]

Congrats on your beautiful baby!!!

You did the right thing, don't let others make you feel bad for it.

My niece is adopted, it was a long process, and my brother and sister in law were there in the hospital the day she was born...we all were aware that the birth parents had some time to change their minds and that the adoption wouldn't be finalized for a while...and while my brother and sister in law were beyond excited for their new baby they knew that they could still lose her. yes, they had a nursery decorated, and a baby shower when they were told that they had been chosen and all of that...but they also knew that there was no 100% guarantee that they wouldn't definitely be keeping her until that time frame was up. The birth parents were completely positive about the adoption, and things did work out for them- and my niece is now 3...I can tell you that the last thing my brother and sister in law would have wanted was to keep a baby from a parent that had regretted giving him/her up in the first place. (I honestly can't imagine what kind of person would feel okay about that?)

I definitely sounds like things have worked out the way they were meant to!!! Enjoy that beautiful baby of yours, boys are a lot of fun

I 100% agree with this. A lot of people are saying how badly they feel that a baby they thought they were getting was ripped away from them. Though I understand that they probably felt a great deal of dissappointment and heartache, it will only be a temporary thing-especially since by the sounds of it they jumped right back on the bandwagon and started the process again to get a little girl. Whereas giving up a baby that you concieved and gave birth to will live with and haunt you for the rest of your life. If you give up your baby you will think of it everyday and probably live to regret it. Whereas the possible adoptive parents will get another child that they probably deserve so much but will not look back and say-"Darn it, the one thing I would change would be to get the other baby."

On another note-I have read the thread and i am so happy that you got your baby back, it is true that I am a mother myself but that only means that I can vouch for the undescribable most intense deep deep love you have for your child. There is nothing like it and no matter how much you try and describe it to someone they will never fully understand it unless they go through it themselves

Totally agree! I am so glad you got your baby back, don't let anyone make you feel bad for that. You are going to be an amazing mum

 

[nikki2512]

Congrats on your beautiful baby!!!

You did the right thing, don't let others make you feel bad for it.

My niece is adopted, it was a long process, and my brother and sister in law were there in the hospital the day she was born...we all were aware that the birth parents had some time to change their minds and that the adoption wouldn't be finalized for a while...and while my brother and sister in law were beyond excited for their new baby they knew that they could still lose her. yes, they had a nursery decorated, and a baby shower when they were told that they had been chosen and all of that...but they also knew that there was no 100% guarantee that they wouldn't definitely be keeping her until that time frame was up. The birth parents were completely positive about the adoption, and things did work out for them- and my niece is now 3...I can tell you that the last thing my brother and sister in law would have wanted was to keep a baby from a parent that had regretted giving him/her up in the first place. (I honestly can't imagine what kind of person would feel okay about that?)

I definitely sounds like things have worked out the way they were meant to!!! Enjoy that beautiful baby of yours, boys are a lot of fun

I 100% agree with this. A lot of people are saying how badly they feel that a baby they thought they were getting was ripped away from them. Though I understand that they probably felt a great deal of dissappointment and heartache, it will only be a temporary thing-especially since by the sounds of it they jumped right back on the bandwagon and started the process again to get a little girl. Whereas giving up a baby that you concieved and gave birth to will live with and haunt you for the rest of your life. If you give up your baby you will think of it everyday and probably live to regret it. Whereas the possible adoptive parents will get another child that they probably deserve so much but will not look back and say-"Darn it, the one thing I would change would be to get the other baby."

On another note-I have read the thread and i am so happy that you got your baby back, it is true that I am a mother myself but that only means that I can vouch for the undescribable most intense deep deep love you have for your child. There is nothing like it and no matter how much you try and describe it to someone they will never fully understand it unless they go through it themselves

absolutely agree with everything you have both said
you and your gorgeous little boy have each other and by the sounds of it,the adoptive parents have a little girl who needs them alot more than your little boy ever did,enjoy your little boy and best of luck to you both

 

[carly_mummy2b]

Hey, how are you and that gorgeous boy of yours getting on? x

 

[QuintinsMommy]

so happy you got your baby back!
congrats

 

[Maybe1daysoon]

WOW that is fantastic!!!! I am so very happy for you. I like a previous poster am so proud of you. I think you had the ultimate reality check and will be an even better mommy because of it.

 

[TaylorsMummyx]

How's baby and mummy doing x

 

[JASMAK]

Glad to hear you got your baby back. Reading your first post was heart-wrenching. It did not sound like this is what you really wanted. My mom had my brother when she was 15, and us (my sister and I - we are twins) at 17. She was/is a good mom, although things were hard for her. She was not alone though, she had my dad...they were together until he died when I was 12. Bug hugs to you. And CONGRATULATIONS. x x

 

[AirForceWife7]

Omg hun .. this thread has torn me to pieces .. so happy you got him back

Keep being the best mom you can, you can do it!

 

[GypsyDancer]

Wow. This would not happen in the UK. Adoption is a major piece of family law and not reversible. Once a child is adopted its done, for life. You don't get a month to change your mind and the adoption social workers would be highly unlikely to just return a prospective adoptee to mum without huge parenting assessments.

Hope it works out for you and LO ((((hugs))))

Really?
Im in uk and i had a friend who fell pregnant..she decided throughout her pregnancy she would put it up for adoption..even though her mum as far as i know was really supportive and wanted her to keeep it..anyway..she gave birth to him..they took him away..then after a day or two she realised she'd made the biggest mistake..she got him back thankfully!

OP..i think her little boy is about 3 now and from what ive seen on facebook ect..shes absolutely in love with him..

Glad you got your little boy back, Im sure you know it will be hard at times..but they make up for it so much with all the joy and love they give you.

 

[Annie77]

Wow. This would not happen in the UK. Adoption is a major piece of family law and not reversible. Once a child is adopted its done, for life. You don't get a month to change your mind and the adoption social workers would be highly unlikely to just return a prospective adoptee to mum without huge parenting assessments.

Hope it works out for you and LO ((((hugs))))

Really?
Im in uk and i had a friend who fell pregnant..she decided throughout her pregnancy she would put it up for adoption..even though her mum as far as i know was really supportive and wanted her to keeep it..anyway..she gave birth to him..they took him away..then after a day or two she realised she'd made the biggest mistake..she got him back thankfully!

OP..i think her little boy is about 3 now and from what ive seen on facebook ect..shes absolutely in love with him..

Glad you got your little boy back, Im sure you know it will be hard at times..but they make up for it so much with all the joy and love they give you.

In the UK, unless your baby was removed from you with a court order and you do not contest then adoption is not legal for about 6 months. Most babies given up at birth go to stay with foster carers until legalities are passed & only then will the baby go to adoptive parents

 

[blondey]

Wow. This would not happen in the UK. Adoption is a major piece of family law and not reversible. Once a child is adopted its done, for life. You don't get a month to change your mind and the adoption social workers would be highly unlikely to just return a prospective adoptee to mum without huge parenting assessments.

Hope it works out for you and LO ((((hugs))))

Really?
Im in uk and i had a friend who fell pregnant..she decided throughout her pregnancy she would put it up for adoption..even though her mum as far as i know was really supportive and wanted her to keeep it..anyway..she gave birth to him..they took him away..then after a day or two she realised she'd made the biggest mistake..she got him back thankfully!

OP..i think her little boy is about 3 now and from what ive seen on facebook ect..shes absolutely in love with him..

Glad you got your little boy back, Im sure you know it will be hard at times..but they make up for it so much with all the joy and love they give you.

In the UK, unless your baby was removed from you with a court order and you do not contest then adoption is not legal for about 6 months. Most babies given up at birth go to stay with foster carers until legalities are passed & only then will the baby go to adoptive parents

Not sure if that's a newer thing or not, but I was adopted and my parents took me home from the hospital a few days after I was born.

Glad everything worked out