Adoption, I want him back! Update pg 7 Happy Ending!!

[Lily34]

Hi, I guess I should start from the beginning.

I was 16 years old when I find out I was pregnant, I had gone to a party and after some pressure from I guy I liked I had a few drinks, the rest of the night was kinda a blur, but we ended up sleeping to together, my first time.
The next day he told everyone at school that I was a slut!
Awhile later I started getting sick so I went to my doctor and she ran some tests, and it turn out I had morning sickness! I was shocked, so was my mom.
My mom sat down with me and we talked about what I could do, I wanted to give the baby up for adoption. I felt I was to young and I didn't really want to be a mother. Time seemed to go pretty fast, I didn't want to know anything about the baby as long as it was healthy, I find a very nice couple to adopt him, at that point I started to call him a him. I was fine with what I was doing, and just wanted it to be over with.
Yesterday at about one in the morning I went in to labor. It's was like nothing I have ever been though, the pain was so bad! And it lasted about 12 hours!!
And then he was born, a little boy 7lbs 3oz. I can't put into words what I felt the second I heard him cry, it was like nothing I have ever felt before. I told them before he was born that I didn't want to hold him, but I get to see him for a minute when he was born, and then he was gone.

I'm home now, and I feel like I have made the biggest mistake of my life.
I feel like my heart has been ripped out of my body! I keep trying to tell myself that I did the right thing, but every part of me is screaming that he needs me! and I need him! He's my baby and I'm his mommy! I don't know what to do! My mom says that I should go and get him, I have one month to change my mind. But then I keep thinking about how I didn't want him, and they did so much, and with them he'll have a mommy and a daddy, but I love him so much and I know it won't be easy but I know I can take care of him! I guess I'm scared i'll make the wrong decision for him, and he means more to me then life itself. I just want to hold him!

 

[krissy1984]

i am so sorry sweetie that you're going through this, I have no experience but couldn't read and run, all I can say is that if you want to keep him and you can look after him, it is completely your right to take him back.

Lots of people don't want their babies right away, it is completely life changing but until you experience it you don't know how you'd react. It sounds as if you really want him back. PM me if you want to chat about anything x

 

[hellohefalump]

*hugs*
Do you think you would make a good mother? I'm not talking about money, lots of people bring up children with very little money. I'm talking about giving him the love, devotion and attention that he needs to be emotionally healthy.

Your mum sounds supportive, would she help you if you were to get your baby back?

I know someone who had a baby when she was 14. She had a really supportive mother, who helped (she still lived at home) and now she is 19 and she's moved out into her own place and is doing really well.

She missed out on partying and teenage stuff, but I don't think she regrets it because she loves her daughter more than anything.

I hope you make the right decision, I don't know what that is as I don't know you... but I hope whatever you decide works out for the best.

 

[moomin_troll]

would u be able to talk to them and have a open adoption so ud still be in his life?

if ur not 100% sure u want him and ur ready to be a mum id rather do that then nothing at all.

i cant imagine how ur feeling but as u no u cant go into this lightly x

 

[Mindy_mini]

Listen to your mom. If she is willing to help you you can raise him alone. Thousands if not millions of young women do. If you want your son, go get him back. No one prepares you for the love you feel for your child when they are born. I was scared I wouldn't be able to love my dd for reasons I won't go into but she is the most perfect thing ever and I will kill for her if need be.

Talk it through with your mum but if you have doubts you can't just give up

 

[sophxx]

if you want your baby back speak up hes your baby and theres no reaso why you cant be a amazing mum. theres lots of mums on here around your age who are fab mums.

its toatlly natural to feel the way you did theres lots of people who have a surprise baby and feel like there not ready or dont want the baby( this can happen to people who have planned the baby) but seeing h=your baby is comletely different.

you can keep your baby and surpport him all he needs is you as your his mum

xx

 

[littlelinnies]

if i was you, i would go get him back! i doubt over time the pain will go away, and as someone who was adopted, i cant help but feel like why did my mum adopt me? and resent her a bit! its not about money! im a single mum raising my kids on benfits at the moment and they are loved sooooo much and have all they need.. if you can give him love then theres nothing else you need... xx

 

[littlelinnies]

and dont blame yourself and punish yourself because you were young and scared and had a doubts when you were pregnant! it doesnt make you a bad person or a bad mum! just think if you go and get him, you can make it up to him and yourself by being the most amazing mum! say you still feel like this in years time? it will be too late! its not too late now you can do what your heart clearly wants.. xxx

 

[cherryglitter]

i would be taking him back if it were me
your Mum sounds like a real support to you which will be a huge help.
good luck xx

 

[Miss_d]

sounds like you really do want your son back, with your mums support you can do it, good luck

 

[Novbaby08]

You should go get him then. If your having second thoughts you need to go get him, it will come to haunt you if it wasnt the right choice. I know plenty of 15/16 year old moms that are wonderful parents. You can do it.

 

[Sophie1205]

Personally I think you should get him back. You really do sound like you want him back. I can't even imagine how you feel right now. If you're Mum is saying you should then you should. It sounds like she is willing to help you. There's no reason why you can't be a good Mum! xxxxx

 

[rwhite]

I think you should go for it. From what it sounds like, in your heart of hearts you really want to be a mummy to your little boy. Go for it before it's too late xx Please keep us updated!

 

[Lily34]

I had a talk with my mom to work out school and money, I have one year left of school, so we agreed I would go to a part time night school and that I'd have to get a part time job as well. She said that its going to be hard with school a baby and work, but she said she knows I can do it! So do I. She also said I can take 3-6 months to just be a mom before I would have to go to work/school.

So I get him back! He's sleeping right now, I have no baby things!! We bought a bassinet, diapers and things, but that's it right now, I can wait to get things for him!!
It was a very hard day, I don't know how many times I told people that I was sure that this was what I wanted. I was stressed and worried and little scared, but the second I got to hold him everything want away, it was like nothing matter anymore as long as I had him.

I named him Shawn.
https://i56.tinypic.com/1591g1.jpg

 

[Novbaby08]

so happy for you!!

 

[rwhite]

He is SO beautiful, aww! Good on you for following your dreams. How did his adoptive parents take the news? Are they okay?

Your mum sounds amazing, so glad you've got the support you need from her. She will really help you through this by the sound of things.

xxx

PS, check out the teen parenting section

 

[Lily34]

The adoptive parents were very upset and bit reluctant to hand him over. I feel so bad for them, I picked them because they were very nice, loving people who had been trying to have a baby for 7 years. She asked me if I would send pictures and maybe she could see him again. I'm not sure how I feel about that.

 

[Miss_d]

OMG he is beautiful, look at that we smile, that says it all, hes very happy to be back with his mummy, i wish you both the very best, good luck to you xx

 

[Emma&Freya]

He is lovely

Im so glad that you got him back. Its upto you if you want to keep in touch with them, only you can make the choice. Dont feel pressured into it xx

 

[moomin_troll]

i cant imagine how heart broken the couple is and i understand why they would want a picture but hes ur baby and this is the risk they took adopting a newborn baby.

good luck being a mummy sounds like uve got a good mum helping u tho