Advice from single mothers?

[jozylynn896]

I am scared to death. I apologize in advance because this might be reeeeeally long.
My boyfriend and I have been together since July 19, 2011. Which is kind of a while. I love him so much. People always say that we're just stupid kids but honestly I feel like we're meant to be together. I can't even explain how much I love him!
He's 19 and I'm 16.
I grew up in a broken home and he comes from a pretty high class home.
We've gone through some shit together! And we've never given up on us.
Before I met him I was honestky not afraud of anything. I would stay out all night and drink, smoke. Have sex with guys I didn't even know. I even had some pregnancy scares. But I honestly felt like I had nothing to live for at all.
Before I met him I honestly didn't know I could fell like this! I was never afraid of any thing, and suddenly my biggest fear became losing him.
I stopped doing everything. I can't imagine the last party I went to. I've become such a different person. I don't do those stupid things, I've matured incredibly and I'm a one man woman now.
A couple of months ago, we found out I was pregnant. Since then he has been acting so strange.
(Okay so tell me if this sounds stupid?!)
He always looked at me with something in his eyes. Love! He looked at me with these dazzling little eyes.
Since a little before we found out I was pregnant, his eyes stopped dialating for me, or twinkiling. When I say things like that he says "that makes no sense, I still love you and the way I look at you has nothing to do with it"
And that hurts me.
Anyways, I've been stressing out a lot because I just have this gut feeling that we're going to end. I know everybody says "just think about you and the baby". But that is so hard to do, right? I mena don't get me wrong, I'm not trying to hurt my baby or anything, it just hurts me that I feel like that and I swear to God I can't remember the last night I didn't cry myself to sleep.
I've been in and out of the hospital all the time because I have two blood clots in each lung and this is just killing me. (He spend all visiting hours with me though, which is really lovely).
I'm sorry and I really don't even know what I'm asking. I guess I just need advice just in case I do have to do this alone.
(He's been threatning to leave because he knows how bad it hurts me, then he quickly apologizes and admits me was wrong).

 

[lil lovey]

Hi:wave: I'm really sorry that you going through this. You need to calm down sweety, I know it night be hard to do but you need to be calm for you baby.

 

[mudgekin1989]

Hi jozylynn896... I'm sorry to hear you're having a hard time, as lil lovey said, calm down... Wait and see how things pan out. When my son was 6 weeks old I left his father, I was a single mum for over 2 years (am now with someone amazing)... I don't know what advice to give you, I gave my step sister one piece of advice so I suppose I'll pass it on to you...

Never ever say "I can't"... I discovered that whenever I said that any situation I had to manage was harder, and almost unmanageable... Try to always think "I can"... Positive thinking is the way, and you'll find that being a mummy, single or otherwise, will come mostly naturally, and any difficulties can be spoken about with health visitors etc.

 

[jozylynn896]

Thankyou so much for your advice! I know I can raise my son without him, I guess its just a terrifying thought sincr I love him. But I do love my son already much more than I can ever love my boyfriend.

 

[Mandy04]

I'm sorry hun..I know this is hard with you beinng young. Sometimes being young can be a disadvantage because you have'nt experienced alot sometimes things can just be in your head maybe because you are paranoid about the worse that can come. I am 25 I have 4 children my first I got pregnant at 17 I did the same things he's going to leave me and it never happened. Hormones can be crazy! I wish you the best hun!

 

[jozylynn896]

Thank you! He always tells me its my hormones! Haha