Advice needed from parents with 2 close in age?

Discussion in 'Toddler & Pre-School' started by isabellastar, Oct 11, 2013.

  1. isabellastar

    isabellastar Well-Known Member

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    My lg is 20 months and am due my second lg on the 20th of this month! My problem is I just feel like I'm going through the motions of having a baby! My 1st was planned this 1 wasn't my 1st I was so excited I had everything ready by 30 weeks this time I've not even finished my hospital bag and only picked the pushchair up yesterday! I'm so worried I'm not going to love this one the same as I do my lg I just can't imagine loving anyone else as much as I love her and feel like she's always going to be my faviourite, I hate feeling like this and so want to love them the same, just want some reassurance that I will love this baby the same really?
     
  2. suzib76

    suzib76 Well-Known Member

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    You will, you totally will.

    I know it feels like you couldn't possibly find enough love but it's there

    The organisation thing, you had all the time in the world to get ready for baby 1. When baby 2 comes along you are busy with baby 1, you don't have so much free time etc to plan and organised everything. You will get there though :)
     
  3. CaptainMummy

    CaptainMummy Well-Known Member

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    I wasnt as excited with my second. I didnt go all out and buy loads (we bought bare minimum) and I just didnt really bother and hardly thought about the new baby. I knew I would love her, but i didnt think it would be quite the same (we did plan the pregnancy).

    As soon as I lay eyes on her, I loved her as much as my first. Okay, so i dont oogle over her as much, or hold her as much as my first... I dont run to her as soon as I hear her cry. It doesnt mean I dont love her the same, Im busy with a 2yr old so baby just has to wait!

    Both of my girls mean the world to me, and I promise that you will love your new baby with all of your heart too :hugs:
     
  4. isabellastar

    isabellastar Well-Known Member

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    That's what I've done I've barely brought anything as had everything from my 1st and tbh just pushed this pregnancy to the back off my mind and now she's 9 days away I think it's all hit me! Thank you both I know I'm probably over thinking everything at the minute hormones aren't helping lol
     
  5. hayley x

    hayley x 1AngelSon,1EarthDaughter

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    you really really will love this new baby just as much as your first baby. the love for you child wont reduce, the love will grow for your brand new baby. I think its so normal to worry you wont love a new baby as much as your first baby. We have a gap of 19.5 months and they are the best of friends, its so lovely seeing them together, I can feel my heart just talking about it. Honestly its the best xx :hugs: xx
     
  6. Aphrodite

    Aphrodite Well-Known Member

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    Welcome to the 'second baby syndrome' lol
    I barely noticed I was pregnant with DS2 I was so busy. I did get stuff but not as much. I was more desperate to get the pregnancy over with than consumed by excitement although I was excited. DS2 ia now in 3rd hand clothes lol
    But I absolutely love them the same. It is different, Ill always have a special bond with DS1 as I think most parents do with their firsts. But Tommy is special and loved in his own way. I cant imagine loving them anymore than I do :)
     
  7. Banshee

    Banshee Mother of 2 boys

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    I can totally relate to what you are saying. Ds1 was planned and we tried for over a year to get pregnant. We had the nursery done 3 months before he was born and were totally organised. Ds2 was a happy accident and I was definitely too busy with ds1 to put the same effort into getting things ready.
    I adore both my children but I think generally i'm just more relaxed with ds2 about everything. I wouldn't worry :)
     

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