Age, fertility and TTC

[XxxIM08-09xxX]

If you're worried about your fertility, then my advice would either be to start trying now, so if there are any problems you have plenty of time to get them sorted out OR go and get yourself checked out now to put your mind at rest that there no potential issues with your fertility.

I already had a one year old daughter when I met my hubby, so we put off trying for a baby together for a few years. We started ttc when I was 34. By the time we realised anything was wrong I was 36, time was running out and changes of IVF working getting lower all the time. Because of my experience, I always tell people don't put it off too long - because if there is something wrong and you can't conceive, then you are limiting the amount of time you have left to do something about it.

Good luck.

 

[cari6]

I was 18 when I had my first, Second at 22, 3rd at 26, I fell first month after coming off the pill with all of them, Don't know if i will be as lucky this time at 30. On my last pack of ovranette now and will start tcc end of feb.

 

[sunshine2010]

My plan for the last 9 years was to have a baby or be pregnant before I am 25... I've just turned 24 so that plan may just be out the window!! But I guess I can always live in hope! (O/H has just turned 28)

 

[runnergrl]

I am 29 and my husband is 31. You would think HE would be the one wanting to speed things along, but no. All of his friends jokingly tell him to wait as long as you can to have kids because your life changes so dramatically and blah blah blah. i mean I know it does and thats what I'm looking FORWARD to, lol! I dont know what his deal is but I am trying my best to be patient.

We dated for 2 1/2 years, bought a house, got married last July and he wanted to wait a full year after we got married to start trying for a baby. I wanted to start straight away, or at least compromise (6 months which would have been Jan) but I lost out on that one. Unfortunately it takes two to make a baby, LOL!

So to answer your question, he will be 32(yikes) and I will be almost 30 when we try and yes I am terrified of fertitily issues. Especially since I have one functioning ovary..but thats a whole other story Hopefully it wont take too long

 

[poppy]

I think there is no 'perfect' time - everyone has different lives and different views on the issue. Some people want to have youth on their side, whilst others want to wait till they are older and have 'lived' or are more financially stable.

I got married when I was 29 and started TTC when I just turned 30, I fell pregnant on the third cycle but unfortunately, that ended in an early miscarriage. We then started trying again a few months after that and fell pregnant straight away. I gave birth a few days after I turned 31.

Even though, I know they go on about fertility rates being best in your 20s, I don't think you really need to overly worry about fertility issues at your age (unless you have some indication that there may be a problem) - although, I know we all do it to a certain extent before we TTC. You are still young, 28 is definately not old. Most people have good rates of getting pregnant fairly quickly and healthily into their 30s. I think they say that fertility only starts to really decline from around 35 (although individuals vary) and only starts to dramatically decline in your late 30s. Also, there is always going to be people who struggle to get pregnant, whether they start trying at 20 or 40 due to certain gynaecological problems. Having said that, I am not saying people should wait too long! If you are worried and feel ready to TTC, just go for it! Like others have said, if we all waited until we felt we had enough money, a big enough house, have travelled enough, partied enough etc etc, would anyone ever feel they were 'ready'? On the other hand, don't rush into it, if you feel there are things you need to do first or if you feel that you are going to end up feeling stressed about stuff like money.

Sorry for the long and rambling post!

Good luck with your decision and getting a speedy BFP when you decide the time is right for you!

 

[FairyDust2009]

I'm in the same position. My DH was made redundant last year and is now taking a degree, which means he doesn't want to try for childnre for about 3 to 4 years. That wouldn't be so bad except that I am 31 this year and suffer from endometriosis so am worried about conception.
I have put all this to him but I don't think he quite understands how worried I am.
Most of the time I'm ok, but then I think about it and get upset. One of my friends has just had a baby and we're seeing them on Sunday, and I don't know how I'll cope knowing I could be 34/35 by the time we start trying!

FairyDust

 

[vermeil]

gee you ladies sound like life is over at 30

You are as fertile at 35 than at 16. You still produce an egg every month, that can be fertilized. The only thing that changes is you have *slightly* higher risks of certain specific problems like downs syndrome. And there are now excellent tests to rule those out.

I met my beau at 34, got married at 36, started trying at 37 - took 7 months. Will be 38 when little one arrives. I feel like this is the perfect time for us. We both have good jobs, just bought a house. Life is good. I'm sure we'll have time for #2. Besides there's always adoption that's an amazing adventure on its own

 

[FairyDust2009]

Vermeil,

Thank you for the wise words. You are right of course, there are other options open to us and plenty of time to try. I think, for me at least, its accepting that life isn't going to go the way I had hoped and that there doesn't seem to be any compromise on my DH side. That's what is causing me to struggle with it.

But hey ho, I like your positive attitude and will try to focus on that myself from now on.

FairyDust