Almost 44 final ttc journey -- buddies needed : )

[AngelUK]

Best wishes from me too! You definitely deserve your turn now! I hope your husband is better?

 

[Sophie2015]

Hi ladies. Sad news. Of my 13 follies only 6-8 are growing. Waiting on them to cancel my cycle. And on that note we are done. But I'd like to lurk and keep in touch with you all. You've been so wonderful to me. I hope you get your bfp's soon!!

 

[CaliDreaming]

Sophie I've been following along but haven't had a chance to post up to now. So sorry your response is not what you were hoping for. 😕 I'm not really familiar with Ivf but I had thought 6-8 follicles was enough to proceed? Also isn't it true that the number they see on the scan might be lower than actually retrieved? I know you're disappointed but it seems a little early to be writing off the cycle. Maybe you make it to egg retrieval and you have 10-11 follicles instead of 6-8. Or maybe you'll get there and you have 6 but they all fertilize. There's just no way of knowing. I know this must be wrenching with the stakes involved. I imagine you're preparing your heart for the worst but your mind should know you're still in the game. Hope you had a happy thanksgiving!!!

 

[CaliDreaming]

Ariel! Welcome. So glad to see more of us 40+ ladies on this forum!! You have really been through a lot! ibguess sometimes it takes that to make clear what you really want out of life. Good luck!

 

[Sophie2015]

Cali- if I was younger I think they'd be more hopeful but at 44 the general rule of thumb is 50% make it each step of the way. So of the 6 half will be mature. Half of those 3 will fertilize. Half of those 1.5?! Will make it to day 2. And half of less than one embryo will be healthy. I guess we just don't have enough to work with. We are terribly disappointed. Waiting on my E2 results now. It's been so low that it doesn't appear my follicles either have eggs or that they are growing correctly. In hindsight I wish we'd gone this route in April of 2015 when we started with my RE. I just couldn't embrace the failure of being able to conceive without IVF. Probably the biggest mistake of my life.

 

[CaliDreaming]

I just don't think stats are very useful since there's so many variables involved at everyone's situation is unique. When you read about women's actual experiences instead of just stats, you see that they vary widely. By stats you should not have been able to get pregnant at all at your age so the fact that you have been able to conceive without ivf is one reason to believe you could be one of the successful ones. Lots of women go years without ever seeing that second line so that is a significant difference between you and other 40+ women undergoing ivf.

 

[Sophie2015]

Cali- I know. And I used to agree with you. I guess hearing over and over from my RE that there's really no hope for us has finally cemented itself into my brain.
Still waiting for my E2 results and official word. Sigh.

 

[TTC74]

Sophie, I'm so sorry to hear this news. I hope the RE is more optimistic than you are, but regardless we are here for you.

 

[Sophie2015]

RE just called. They are letting me continue on. Decreasing my Follistim but adding Menopur and Ganirelix starting today. E2 almost tripled in 48 hours which I guess is good. FX'd! I'm stunned it's not over.

 

[AngelUK]

That is good news indeed! I am glad it is not over! But even before I read your last post I wanted to say: All you need is one good egg that makes it through! A friend of mine had to do IVF and genetic testing cause of a genetic thing that runs in her family (results in severe ******ation but I am not sure what exactly it is) and of all the fertilised eggs she had (not sure how many), only one embryo was healthy and "normal". He is 4y now! I know she is younger than you but all I mean with this is that it only takes one!

 

[Ariel777]

Sophie..yes my husband is better..God let me catch that cough and make my husband got the ER...I had told him dont leave without an xray..they didn't want to give him one insisting it was a flu...but he got the xray and it showed the mass....they took out one fourth of his lung....said it was the last stage of stage 1 cancer....so after chemo and radiation treatment for a year he shows no signs of it at each check up. ..the sperm damage is just temporary. ...so we can use fresh sperm..we do have some frozen from when I was seeing the fertility specialist for my son.......I guess for emergencies but we can't use it anyway because our finances are not even close to like they where before..... if my AF dosent come in 3 days I could be pregnant. ...even though I haven't been trying I have been tracking my CM,periods and ovulation pain....since my son...after doing those treat men's for so long it became a habit...so this month I know when I ovulation and we BD at the right time..I'm keeping my fingers crossed. ...also I'm thinking everything happens for a reason.I may have had the MC because God knew my husband's condition. ..all this has made our relationship stronger....

 

[Sophie2015]

Ariel- I'm a firm believer in everything happens for a reason. Keeping my fingers crossed for you!! When will you test?

 

[CaliDreaming]

Ariel777, what an amazing story! It is so good you had the presence of mind to get him to do the X-ray. My mother died of lung cancer and had suffered for years before they X-rayed her and by then it was too late. They kept telling her her symptoms were in her head. I have much respect for doctors but I also believe patients have a huge role to play in the process. Yes I can just imagine how much closer this terrible experience has brought you. I hope you two can move forward into a new, happier phase of life.

That is great news Sophie! Ugh, I can see why you're so down with what your RE said. Well if I had a dollar for everytime an RE has been wrong! They seem to be wrong more often than most doctors. Mine told me we were very unlikely to get pregnant without IVF and blamed my age. It's very depressing when they tell you stuff like this, no doubt. I remember being incredibly depressed even though in my head I knew they were wrong. My labs were great and we'd already had gotten pregnant so I still can't understand why she gave us such a grim prognosis.

I think REs have a lot of technical knowledge but maybe all of that makes it harder for them to exercise common sense. It just doesn't make sense that a person who can get pregnant pretty reliably with IUI wouldn't be able to do so with IVF. I'm not claiming to have a crystal ball but neither do they. There's a lot they know but there's even more that they don't.

 

[Sophie2015]

I won't have E2 results for hours but ultrasound today wasn't bad. I have 10 follies all about the same size. Another 4 less than 10. And 6 micros. For my age that's pretty good I think. I have another appt tomorrow. ER is Thursday or Friday. FX'd! Of course my issue isn't conceiving so hoping at least 1 of these follicles has a genetically sound egg.

 

[AngelUK]

FX!!!!

 

[CaliDreaming]

Great news Sophie!! 10 mature follicles and 10 possibles would be a very respectable response for a woman of any age but is incredible for a 40+ woman. Interesting that your AMH seems to match what doctors would predict your IVF response would be.

I'll be sending out all the good vibes I can for Thursday/Friday. Like you said, you have never had a problem getting pregnant so I have no doubts the egg retrieval and fertilization will go well. I just know your lucky egg is in this batch of eggs!

I wish there were a way to fast forward past the testing of the embryos. The suspense is killing me so I can only imagine what it must be like to be actually going through it!

 

[Sophie2015]

Cali- I'm a bundle of emotions. Right now I'm just hoping to survive the process. My hematologist wanted me hospitalized and on Heparin prior to ER to "bridge the gap" between coming off Lovenox and ER. But insurance won't cover it. So I'm having to be off thinners completely for about 4-5 days. It's a little scary. I don't want to throw another clot but I can't risk bleeding during my retrieval either. Beyond that I'm just focused on each hurdle. Total eggs. Total mature. Total fertilized. Total that even grow large enough to be tested. If I can get that far I'll be on pins and needles about my PGS results. Sigh. I'm just hoping for 8 or so mature eggs right now. And since I seem to conceive EVERYTHING so easily I'm hoping they all fertilize.
On a side note I've got approx $2500 worth of meds left over. What do people do with perfectly good meds?! Such a waste.
Thank you guys for hanging with me!! You are among my only few friends that know and I cherish your support!!

 

[TTC74]

I second what the other ladies said. I'm so hopeful for you, Sophie!

 

[CaliDreaming]

Gah, hate that the insurance companies can totally override doctor's advice! Sounds like your ability to focus is helping you cope well with the stress.

Maybe you could check with your clinic to see if you could donate your unused meds. Too bad they just won't let you get your money back for them!

 

[CaliDreaming]

Just checking in Sophie! Is your ER going to happen tomorrow??