I haven't posted in a while but I need some advice. Background info: My FIL left his wife (MIL) for her sister and they have now been married for a few years. MIL has a mental illness and it is hard to put her in a room with other people as she usually will start a fight. But she is still the grandma. So my amazing SIL is throwing me a shower. When StepMIL found out she booked a trip to Cuba so she couldn't show up since MIL will be there. Now the stepMIL says that she is going to throw another shower and pretty much make SIL's shower not happen (as they will go to the stepMIL's shower and not hers). First I am so angry that the stepMIL would do this as she always finds a way to make everything about her and she will leave MiL out of the shower that she throws bc they haven't spoken in a few years. Anyways am I allowed to completely freak out and not go to this other shower that is being planned? I feel so bad for my MIL as she will end up not being any part of this if stepMIL gets her way and SIL will be crushed as she is sooo excited about doing this. I figure this is the only time I am allowed to be completely selfish but please let me know what you think. (my mom is not doing the shower as she lives in Vancouver and I live in Toronto. She has already booked her ticket to be out here for SIL's shower.) Any help would be great as I think my hormones have made me a mad woman right now.