AlwaysPraying
Mom of two!
- Joined
- May 5, 2009
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They say when your personal stuff is impending on your life or others life then it is an issue. If it's bothering you, or upsetting your relationship (or yourself) then you need to get it fixed / change it.
Ask yourself this - do you believe your actions control things? If you check three times, does that ensure that something bad won't happen? That's a good indication that your control is going in the wrong way if you believe that. Yes, locking doors is right, but triple checking them does not make it more secure, and if you don't check three times, that does not mean that someone will break in. Do you see what I mean?
If you can, try only checking it once. Try doing things in a different order and force yourself to go downstairs and let it be. If it's killing you and you can't stand it being done a different way, then, I'd say, think about that, see if you want to change that. It's really all up to you.
I check on cubs 2x before I go to bed, every night. Well, I used to. It started as habit and then it started into an obsession. First I'd go check on him, then go to the bathroom, then check on him again, then go to bed myself. If for some reason I went to the bathroom before checking on him, I'd be sure to check on him twice anyways. It quickly became an issue and I forced myself to think about why I needed to do that, and the fact was, I didn't need to, I wanted to. So now, I check once, or twice if I want to and it works out, but not because I have to.
There's a fine line between taking care of our families and taking it too far. Because really, it's never too much care when we are talking about our kids, right? Wrong. It's not healthy to sacrifice our own mental well being because we think we're helping the health and safety of our children. We end up staying up late, not sleeping well, missing out on happy times, genuinely missing enjoying time to ourselves when all we do is worry that something wasn't done right. Sorry to go on, but I've been there and it's not a fun place to be, but then again, I enjoy taking care and being aware. Now I triple check his car seat (safety), and check on him once after I put him to bed (safety), and that's all I need, and it's reasonable. You need to find what's reasonable for you.
Ask yourself this - do you believe your actions control things? If you check three times, does that ensure that something bad won't happen? That's a good indication that your control is going in the wrong way if you believe that. Yes, locking doors is right, but triple checking them does not make it more secure, and if you don't check three times, that does not mean that someone will break in. Do you see what I mean?
If you can, try only checking it once. Try doing things in a different order and force yourself to go downstairs and let it be. If it's killing you and you can't stand it being done a different way, then, I'd say, think about that, see if you want to change that. It's really all up to you.
I check on cubs 2x before I go to bed, every night. Well, I used to. It started as habit and then it started into an obsession. First I'd go check on him, then go to the bathroom, then check on him again, then go to bed myself. If for some reason I went to the bathroom before checking on him, I'd be sure to check on him twice anyways. It quickly became an issue and I forced myself to think about why I needed to do that, and the fact was, I didn't need to, I wanted to. So now, I check once, or twice if I want to and it works out, but not because I have to.
There's a fine line between taking care of our families and taking it too far. Because really, it's never too much care when we are talking about our kids, right? Wrong. It's not healthy to sacrifice our own mental well being because we think we're helping the health and safety of our children. We end up staying up late, not sleeping well, missing out on happy times, genuinely missing enjoying time to ourselves when all we do is worry that something wasn't done right. Sorry to go on, but I've been there and it's not a fun place to be, but then again, I enjoy taking care and being aware. Now I triple check his car seat (safety), and check on him once after I put him to bed (safety), and that's all I need, and it's reasonable. You need to find what's reasonable for you.