~ Anorexia, Bulimia & Eating Disorder Support Thread ~

[Groovychick]

My partner is often like that too hun. He's pleased when I don't b/p, but when I do he becomes angry and upset. I can understand why he feels this way, but more than anything need his support when I am feeling lonely and depressed.

Have you thought about perhaps seeking some counselling?

 

[9babiesgone]

My partner is often like that too hun. He's pleased when I don't b/p, but when I do he becomes angry and upset. I can understand why he feels this way, but more than anything need his support when I am feeling lonely and depressed.

Have you thought about perhaps seeking some counselling?

eh my last therapist, compared my eating disorder to an someone with a crack addict. I stopped seeing her. I just dont feel comfortable talking to strangers who then precede to tell me how to fix my life and it never works.


yeah I know what you mean, I just need his support, but instead I get his anger when I talk to him about it. it isnt fair to either of us that this is the way they act.

 

[Groovychick]

I know it isn't fair hun. They really need to go on a course: 'How to Understand Eating Disorders in Your Loved One'.

 

[Sarah10]

Sad.

 

[Groovychick]

 

[Sarah10]

Thanks hun x

 

[Phantom]

I've started purging again. I've been so stressed and I know that isn't good for the baby. Should I tell my new doctor about my history? I haven't because she hasn't asked.

 

[Kathleen]

oops. its a long one sorry!
I struggled with bulimia when I was 14-22 due to home life, I felt like I had lost control of my world also felt the usual teenage pressures...it destroyed my life. I didnt tell a soul, only my parents knew and I constantly felt ashamed. My parents sent me to counsellers who to be honest, didn't help me one bit. I'll always remember one session that my parents sat with me and my step-dad said ''I just don't understand why she doesnt just eat bread instead of all our nice food'' pfffft ignorance!!! They even sent me for private help that only made me feel more awkward-I never understood how it was meant to help me!

Then when I was 16, myself and friends when to a house party, alcohol was invovled but we didnt drunk! My mum picked us up in the morning (she's quite laid back!) then laying on the sofa, I had a seizure-all I can remember was waking in the ambulance and being scared sh**less!

This didn't stop me though and when I was 18 I was in a long term relationship (complete nightmare hiding bulimia!) after I had been sick I drove to the shopping centre, last thing I remembered was talking to a man and walking to the bank-my head was spinning and I couldn't focus and everything was warped...next thing I'm waking up in A&E after another seizure due to low blood sugars and I was told that I was found on the floor, I had a golf ball sized bump on my head!

I don't want this post to scare anyone I just wanted to share my experience and it's important to know that everyone is different, it was just the cause of my body telling me in a very dramatic way to slow down!

It's true that feelings and urges never leave you but it made me realise how much I'd damaged my body and now (I'm 26) I am bigger but happier! I will never love my body but I have learnt to love the good things (I do love my boobs!) and the things I don't like I haven't accepted.

I know how hard it is to break a pattern and its even harder when the people around you have no idea what it's like and if like me you have to organise it so that you're not full before you go out...so it controls your life! Even now I struggle to eat in front of people I don't know.

I'm not pregnant(yet!) or bulimic anymore but I have understanding of how it controls you which is ironic when you consider that an eating disorder starts when you need to feel in control so I have a good idea how hard it must be for you ladies-you body is now doing its own thing so it is an exciting time but for an anoerexic/bulimic its also hard to let your body change.

Sending hugs to you all!! Xxxxx

 

[Sarah10]

I really want to get over this, now

 

[Windmills]

Only just found this thread! I thought i'd introduce myself, but first to everyone!
I've suffered from disordered eating since i was 8 (im 20 now :wacko)
During my pregnancy was the only time i felt "in control" (well sort of, iykwim) i had to eat for my baby and i did and i put on weight and i didnt care. Which is the first time in my life and it was a great feeling. Im breastfeeding my LO and have lost alot of weight doing it and im bloody terrified im going to start "liking" losing the weight and end up going back to a place i dont want to be. Im even worried about posting this as i feel by doing so im letting it get back into my head
But anyway, hello to you all!

Totally know how you feel. I am so scared about enjoying losing weight because although I am so determined to stay well for the sake of my LO, a part of me 'misses' the anorexia, because it was my crutch when things went wrong, I don't know how else to cope when I'm sad, its the only way I know how to make myself feel better. Everything has run quite smoothly since I got pregnant so I don't know how I'm going to react when something inevitably goes wrong Have you been getting help hun?

I completely relate to both of you, I posted before but got scared and wiped it. I've recently lost my job and whereas I have always been bulimic we really cant afford for me to binge so I stopped eating and my milk has gone I've tried really hard today but I turn to drink when I cant binge and that wont help.. i may delete this....scared of what people will think

Amy, I'm going to facebook you now xx

 

[Groovychick]

I've started purging again. I've been so stressed and I know that isn't good for the baby. Should I tell my new doctor about my history? I haven't because she hasn't asked.

I think its a good idea hun.

 

[A3my]

thanks katie I'm rubbish at talking about this

 

[Groovychick]

https://i17.photobucket.com/albums/b54/Alannah28/8whyj7.gif

 

[A3my]

ive put on 3 lbs bingeing and i feel nasty

 

[Groovychick]

You are not nasty hun even though you may feel this way. Its your ED telling you so. Ignore it. You are worth so much more.

 

[A3my]

Thanks Groovychick - how are you doing? xx

 

[tallybee]

Hi girls - I hope you all don't mind me coming onto this thread. I've had problems with eating for as long as I can remember. My mum was always on a diet when I was little and I kind of followed in her steps but took it too far
I'm 28 now and thought I'd got past it but I haven't. Things have been pretty shit lately, OH and I are now on a break, and I've made myself sick several times today, after every single thing I've eaten. I feel totally disgusting

 

[dusty_sheep]

Heya everyone,

guess I am one of you. I've had problems with anorexia and bulimia for 15 years now. When I was pregnant, I was totally honest with my docs - just because I wanted that, in case of an emergency, they would know where the problem may come from. Dunno if that makes sense, though.

I was doing so good right before and a while after my LO's birth. Then I slowly slipped back into old habits.

I feel so horribly bad every time I make myself sick. The LO ist a year old now, and I can't really figure out if she realizes that mommy is so f*cked up in her head.

Even writing about makes me want to cry. But that probably is because I'm having a really tough time in general - marriage is going down the drain day by day, and I don't feel like there's still a chance for us, and I'm dealing with anxiety issues these days which doesn't exactly make things any easier.

I used to be underweight before I got pregnant, then I gained to a normal weight within the first trimester, followed by another "usual weight gain" during the second and third trimester. While I was pregnant, I always wanted to do everything to have a healthy baby, and I did get a healthy baby.

And while I always thought that a child would be reason enough to stop worrying about weight and what I eat, the old feeling of being too fat came back.

I am at a healthy weight now, just my eating habits are far from healthy. And some days, I even wonder what exactly I seek when wanting to be thinner again. Truth is, being thin always made me feel save, people did see that I was not okay. Now, it's just the opposite - everyone keeps telling me that I have no reason to feel unhappy, and that my anxiety is just silly.

And I do have everything I've always wanted, and still I am unhappier than I have ever been in my life.

I'm so sorry about rambling here, and I'm sorry if this doesn't make sense to you - it doesn't to me either. Plus, English is not my first language and this is not my best day either, obviously...

 

[tallybee]

dusty I feel your pain.
First of all congratulations on your healthy LO. And please, you must stop being so hard on yourself. It's not good beating yourself up, whatever happens. WHatever people say about not having reason to be unhappy, if you are unhappy then that is a fact and nobody's ignorant comments about whether you have any reason to be, are of any use or consequence.

Have you seen anyone about this before? I was referred for counselling for other reasons and found the strength to tell the doctor at the assessment appointment about my bulimia, I'm still waiting for the CBT to start but hoping it will be of help. I have heard that this form of counselling is useful for ED.

All the best x

 

[Groovychick]

Thanks Groovychick - how are you doing? xx

Not too bad thanks hun. I've only engaged in 'bad' behaviour once in the past week or so which is definite progress for me.