Any advice?

Discussion in 'Teen Pregnancy' started by Lola472, Jun 5, 2011.

  1. Lola472

    Lola472 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Apr 12, 2011
    Messages:
    730
    Likes Received:
    0
    Hey girls!
    Some of you know- some of you don't- that my mom did not exactly take the news of my pregnancy well. So as a results FOBs parents offered to let me move in with them. School just ended and I officially moved in on Thursday. It's really weird living with someone elses family. I know some of you girls live with FOBs family. And advice on this?
    FOB and me are sharing a room so I could see how the tight space may come back and bite us! He isn't exactly excited about the pregnancy yet. So I'm hoping (fingers crossed) that being together more will help him come around. Probably just wishful thinking! Any helpful tips on how to mix pregnancy with living with someone for the first time??
     
  2. krys

    krys Madi's Mommy

    Joined:
    Dec 5, 2010
    Messages:
    2,578
    Likes Received:
    0
    I've lived with my fiancé for about a year and a half, but just recently his mom and sister moved in with us. I was bitchy and complained a lot at first, but now it's great. Make sure you help out around the house, offer to do the dishes, help clean up after dinner, etc. Be pleasant towards them and they should do the same! As for living with FOB, if youre staying in a little room together, make sure you keep it clean! I don't know about you, but I used to make a mess in my room when I was trying to find and outfit or something. You have to respect that it's his space too! I try to clean up before he gets home from work, I'll put things away and I'll make the bed. Little things! That way I know he'll be happy when he gets in our room and it looks nice.
    I think my whole point is to make them all see that you're bringing something to the table. Then they'll be happy you're living with them!

    If you haven't yet, you'll start feeling baby move soon! Let him feel, that was a big eye opener for my fiancé. I also let his mom feel sometimes, she cried the first time she felt Madi kick! I think it brought us closer, even though she was always happy about my pregnancy.
     
  3. xSarahM

    xSarahM Two Beautiful Angels

    Joined:
    Apr 3, 2011
    Messages:
    3,017
    Likes Received:
    0
    Last August me and OH moved in together, we found it so stressedful that he moved out again in November! We're living together now, and its a lot easier, but he's really excited about the pregnancy. Sorry :(

    My honest advice would be not to push the pregnancy topic too hard right now. Get over the stress of living together first, and when its comfortable in that respect, bring up LO. Good luck :flower:
     
  4. dreabae

    dreabae Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Mar 16, 2011
    Messages:
    2,363
    Likes Received:
    0
    I moved in with FOB after I found out I was pregnant. I think we had been together like a month and a half. You that annoying feeling of your own family you get sometimes and you just want to get away? Youll probably get that. OHs mom does some of the most ridiculous stuff and it makes me wanna scream! Just remember they are taking you in and obviously care alot about you to take you in.

    As for the space I should take pics of this house and show you. I literally have my clothes in clothing bins because I have no place to put anything so Im worried for when Roman comes (if we dont have our own place) because my brothers moving in and I have no clue if the babys stuff will fit in our room. We would have room if his mom would go through things but its tuff since its all her passed mothers things.

    If hes staying with you I think he might be excited for the baby. OH doesnt show much excitement and doesnt take much interest in planning for the baby but the minute he felt the baby move his eyes lit up and thats how I knew he wasn't just telling me he was excited.
     
  5. oOskittlesOo

    oOskittlesOo Guest

    Hey love:) As you know, I was living with FOB. We'd lived together for a while, and I know that feeling your talking about. It seems weird at first but I'm sure you both will get used to it and end up liking it. Now that we don't live together I miss having someone right there beside me :wacko: I never thought I'd say that!! My advice is if you two seem to start arguing and things you go away for yhe night to a friends or something. Sometimes it's not the same got both of you how you do things in your room so it could cause disagreements until you're both happy about how it
    is.. I'm sure he's just excited, he probably just doesn't really "get it". As soon as FOB wasn't around me everyday he felt like he was missing everything, so mybe Max will realize how different it is and love it being able to be close and actually there.
     
  6. aidensxmomma

    aidensxmomma 4 on Earth, Many in Heaven

    Joined:
    May 14, 2008
    Messages:
    5,232
    Likes Received:
    4
    I lived with my OH's family a couple years ago. What made it easiest to adjust was remembering that it was their house and they were nice enough to let me stay there. I tried to be as helpful as possible and always cleaned up after myself (and Aiden later down the line) and did stuff like that. We also helped out with bills and stuff as much as we could. If I wanted special food or shampoo or anything, I got it myself so they wouldn't feel like they had to do everything for me. We didn't have much space either. We had one bedroom for us and Aiden and when we stayed there again about a year ago, we had to have Mady in that room, too. You'll find a way to make it work, though.

    FOB may just need more time to come around. It's definitely not the same for guys as it is for us. They don't feel any of the changes and they don't feel the baby move as much, etc. Spending a lot of time together may make the pregnancy more real for him, but like someone else said, don't push it. It will just end up pushing him away and making him more distant about it.
     
  7. emz_x

    emz_x Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Nov 30, 2010
    Messages:
    945
    Likes Received:
    0
    I've never lived with FOB so I can't really help you in that respect. I think everyone's advice on that front has been great though. ^

    However, when it comes to not bonding with the baby, I think I may be able to help. My OH really really struggled to talk about the baby at first and he didn't really want to know. It was heartbreaking at the time because pregnancy kind of takes over for us women. :(

    Now OH is getting very excited and he spent ages in ELC the other day trying to pick out toys for LO. He likes feeling him kick and he wants to hear updates and just share everything with me now. :) I think he's more excited than I am now!

    My best advice would be to just let him get used to the idea by himself and not mention it too much. I hope my story has helped you realise that it is very possible for him to do a complete U turn closer to the time. Make sure you keep him involved in all the important things that are happening, and when the baby starts kicking, make sure you put his hand on your stomach. :) It would also be great if he could go to your 20 week scan because that was the first time I noticed my OH getting really excited. It truly is a fascinating time and it's easier to connect at that stage because LO will look like a proper baby.
     

Share This Page

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
    Dismiss Notice