Anyone else feel depressed whilst feeding?

[ChuggaBump]

I know I've posted about this before but noone replied and maybe that cos noone else gets it but I really feel like I need some support and desperately want to find someone else who suffers with it!
I know what it is (d-mer) but I can't find anyone else who has it.
Anyone?!

 

[TheNewMrs]

I'm sorry I don't.
What is it do you mind me asking? x

 

[ChuggaBump]

It's to do with hormones and milk let down...

 

[lazybum09]

i know where you are coming from, do you mean because you are tied to the baby?
i just think about the benefits of what my baby is getting
this is my second child and i breast fed my first for 14 months it does get better hun and if you feel if it isn't right for you

 

[TheNewMrs]

Oh I'm so sorry you feel that way.
I hope it gets better for you soon. Is there anything that can be done about balancing the hormones?

 

[ChuggaBump]

i know where you are coming from, do you mean because you are tied to the baby?
i just think about the benefits of what my baby is getting
this is my second child and i breast fed my first for 14 months it does get better hun and if you feel if it isn't right for you

No it's a hormonal thing so it's not about being tied to the baby... It's weird cos I actually love breastfeeding and love having the cuddles and closeness etc. But when she latches on I feel this sudden overwhelming feeling of being desperately sad / homesick / like I neeeed something. Like I need a drink or bar of chocolate or something but I can't put my finger on what it is I need. It's hard to explain. It's managable most of the time because it passes quickly but sometimes I wish I knew someone else who got it so I could talk to someone who unserstands!!

 

[ChuggaBump]

Oh I'm so sorry you feel that way.
I hope it gets better for you soon. Is there anything that can be done about balancing the hormones?

Thanks... I can't find out anything about "cures" which is another reason I'd like to find someone else who gets it to find out if anything helps them.

 

[staralfur]

But when she latches on I feel this sudden overwhelming feeling of being desperately sad / homesick / like I neeeed something. Like I need a drink or bar of chocolate or something but I can't put my finger on what it is I need.

Oh my goodness, I get this too!! It's getting less and less overwhelming as I go, but in the first few months I remember being desperate for SOMETHING every time I fed her but never could find anything that satisfied me. TBH I didn't know that it was a thing...just thought I was being strange.

This is totally weird and maybe just me but I found carbonated drinks to help a little bit.

I'm really tripped out that you just explained it like that because I can 100% relate.

 

[sandilion]

I have this, have had it since the beginning right till now - hence why i am feeling a bit tired of BF now sadly. It's one of the reasons anyways.

But yeah, it sucks.. I was going through a lot in the early days of having LO (family issues) and I am highly stressed and BF would make me feel so anxious and miserable about all of the things that were negative in my life, and i just feel that even though things have been sorted out, I still get this reaction before the let down and not sure if it's because it's out of habit or what.

 

[ChuggaBump]

Oh my goodness!! I'm so sorry you both get it too because it's horrid, but I'm so excited I've found not one but two other people who get it!

Thanks for the tip staralfur - I'll try drinking coke!

I know I can get through it because I got it with DS and I fed him for nearly a year. But sandilion I know exactly where you're coming from saying you're feeling tired of it. It's really hard.

Here's a link if it helps either of you: https://www.dmer.org

 

[Islander]

thank you for posting - glad im not alone or a freak

 

[Per16]

I get this tooo!

 

[BeccaMichelle]

I know this is an old thread but I get it too... at first I thought I was just strange but I managed to find the d-mer page. It's amazing though because it's EXACTLY what other people say. Homesickness, anxiety, the need for SOMETHING but you don't know what you want, a strange thirst. It's soo specific that once you read about it, there's no doubting you have it. I've never met anyone else with it though.

If it helps. I nursed my first until she was 2 and it definitely went away. I can't remember when but definitely within the first year. My second is 2 months old and it's back with a vengeance now. Hopefully it won't last long...

I'm commenting because if anyone else is out there with this I hope they find this thread. Simply knowing that it's a dopamine reaction and not you going crazy can help.

 

[Claudia83]

Yes, DMER, I had it! It was VERY intense the first 9 months oddly and it did go away. We are still nursing at 24 months! It DOES go away eventually.

I remember being on the verge of TEARS but never quite crying. It was a really bad anxiety feeling and I didn't know what it was exactly because at the time I was also having a bit of PPA/PPD. Once I felt better, I noticed I still would get this odd sensation during breastfeeding that wouldn't go away until we ended the session. I had to find a form of distraction or I would get really antsy. I ended up having to turn on netflix for a movie or watch music videos- it had to really get my attention, it was the only way I could fight through the anxiety feelings.

You're not alone ladies and it will get better with time. I felt like a horrible person because at the time NONE of my friends had ever experienced it and I thought something was definitely wrong with me; nope, very normal in some moms.

 

[staralfur]

My LO was about 7 months old when I posted in here, and I don't remember exactly when it went away but I haven't felt it in a long, long time! Hang in there, ladies.

 

[Evansangel]

I am 100% sure I have it, but I think they are concerned its PND.
I plan to bring it up with the midwife when I see her Thursday and have the DMER website ready to show her.

 

[BeccaMichelle]

I am 100% sure I have it, but I think they are concerned its PND.
I plan to bring it up with the midwife when I see her Thursday and have the DMER website ready to show her.

Good idea. I have a feeling it's one of those things a lot of medical professionals aren't well versed in.

Mine only last around letdown maybe 30 seconds to a minute before I feel mostly normal again. I can't imagine it lasting the whole feed.

With the first baby my mom kept bringing me water because I knew I needed something but not what, so we thought it was water, but I'd never drink much of it!

I'm wondering if it steadily increases, peaks and then goes away. LO is 2 months old and it definitely seems to be worse now than it was in the first month.

 

[anita665]

I get this too. I'm on my third baby and have had it with each of them on and off.

I don't know exactly what brings it on but I think if I'm already tired or have something on my mind it is more likely to happen.

Sometimes he latched on and seconds later I get this horrible sinking feeling. Depressed, worried and tired are the best ways I can describe it. Also if I'm eating anything at the time I do off my food for a little while. Even if I was really hungry I suddenly can't touch it.

If I have it I tend to have it feed after feed for a while and then it will go again. It's a bit annoying!

 

[BeccaMichelle]

LO is almost 9 months now and I only get it very occasionally. I hadn't thought about it for ages and then experienced it last week and was like.. whoa.. it's back, I hadn't realized it was gone. Very subtle. It does get better though.