Anyone else find midwives rude?

[fizzypop]

So I’m 8+3. 3rd baby. I have called the booking like and filled in the appropriate forms online but have not heard anything from an actual midwife. I was admitted to hospital with Hyperemesis nd they said I should see a midwife soon and gave me another number to call. I tried that but yet again was rather abruptly told to be patient.

I don’t know.... I don’t know if it’s because I have Hyperemesis and midwives don’t like it but I have only ever met one midwife who was kind. During both my births so far I’ve seen them eye rolling to each other (because I wasn’t really in labour - baby came out minutes later!), been told to stop making noise (involuntary mooing sound during pushing!!), and they’ve all just been very rude indeed. Has anyone else experienced the same?

I don’t even want a midwife anymore but I will want a matb1 form because I’m spending over £50 a month on medications at the minute!

I can’t remember now, when am I supposed to see a midwife?

 

[RainbowDrop_x]

I’ve only ever come across 1 rude MW. She was a community midwife based at my drs surgery who dismissed some concerns I had in my second pregnancy and then passed me over to the other MW at the surgery after I was seen by her whilst the rude was on leave and had been sent to for tests that the other one referred me for. Infact her exact wording was “well since Janet has sent you for tests im going to transfer your care to her as she has more concerns than I do” I was so gobsmacked. Thankfully I didn’t come across her again but she just so happens to be the midwife I’ve been booked in for with this pregnancy

I don’t necessarily think it’s MW’s as a whole, as with any other profession you’re always going to get the odd few who aren’t professional or 100% kind but I don’t think it’s fair to tar all of them with the same brush. Majority of them work long hours with little rest or break time and considering their a medical professional we get free of charge I think they do amazing work. We certainly wouldn’t have our babies here safe if it wasn’t for them!

 

[catty]

IV only came across one that was a bit cheeky but I have found every other one absolutely lovely!!

The one I thought was cheeky was explaining to me about me being rhesus negative. I told her if my husband got tested and he also was negative it would save alot of injections etc. Her reply no I wouldn't bother doing that as these days you never really know who the dad is. I was flabbergasted!!

 

[fizzypop]

Oh yes I don’t think for a minute that midwives aren’t invaluable in many many cases. They work long long hours often without breaks and their workload is immense. I’ve just never come across a midwife who has been kind to me, apart from one but she has retired now. My mother in law and husband have also commented that they were surprised that they weren’t kinder to patients.

My experiences have made me very wary of midwives to the point that I don’t want one there at this birth. Maybe it’s just the ones in my area but the thought of being spoken to like I have been before makes me want to cry.

I actually saw one that was there when I gave birth to my first, I said “oh, hello, you delivered my first” and she said “uh oh, was I nice to you?”. Why would you think to ask that? Surely you should be kind to patients whatever the circumstances?

 

[xarlenex]

My midwife with my previous pregnancy was horrid! Constantly spoke down to me and tried to make my home birth very difficult for me to achieve, thankfully I stood my ground, got my home birth and she wasn't on call the night our daughter was born so never saw her again!

This time around my midwife is like a breath of fresh air! The consultant I've had to see because of a previous GBS infection and me wanting another home birth, is a whole other story literally throwing out lies trying to put me off!

 

[LoraLoo]

Ive had some truly awful ones and some absolutely amazing ones, and everything in between! I do think in that profession, when women can be at a really vulnerable time in their lives, they need to have a bit of empathy and compassion!
I think its normal to see a mw between 8 and 10 weeks. Ive had HG in my pregnancies but its never made a difference to booking in time x

 

[phantomfaery1]

The midwife I had for my first pregnancy was amazing but the one this time..... I wouldn't say rude she just isn't very good , never replied to my text messages/ calls, every appointment is like a quick 5 mins and when she did my booking bloods it took her 8 attempts to try and do it (which I sat through without a wimper) and couldn't get any blood so had to have it done at Drs then the sample got lost so had to then go back and have it done again uhhh. She told me I didn't need to be tested for gestational diabetes but when I met the consultant they said she was wrong and I was supposed to have it all along so still havnt had that done. The hospital told me to ask her to do my 28 week bloods so I did and she just says ask them to do it because I don't like having my bloods done ( ?????? I've never as much as complained) so still havnt had that done either, seems like she just keeps palming me off to the hospital to do everything and it's a pain in the arse, it's quite far I have no transport and a 2 year old

 

[Bevziibubble]

I've had some good ones and some really bad ones who say the most insensitive things.