anyone in same situation?

[jo14]

I know my daugter (15) is not going to be happy either I think she has her suspitions and i spied on her comp (bad mummy) but she was not happy at all

 

[fuffyburra]

Hi guys, we're in a similar situation too. I'm 22, OH is 51, and he has a step daughter who's nearly 30 and a son who's 16. Like April, OH divorced his wife pretty recently and although it had nothing to do with me, she's managed to push all the blame on to him and me even though I have nothing to do with it. Easier to do than face problems I guess lol.

Anywho, we're worried about how OH's son and daughter will take it, as well as his ex wife. OH's son still lives with his mother and stays with us at weekends. I'm 17 weeks and they don't know yet, because his ex wife has only just been reasonable enough to sign the divorce papers; before that she was point blank refusing out of spite, but now she's got a new boyfriend and is being really adult about it. Due to that, we've only just got to the point where we can say anything so this week is the week!! anyone got any advice?!?!

Thanks for listening and I'm so glad there's support here. So glad I found this thread!!

I wish you guys all the best of luck, hopefully they'll all be fine about it keep in touch x x

 

[DeeM73]

Good luck!!! let us know how it goes!!I'm afraid I don't have any advice cos I'm exactly in the same situation.I know my husband will be telling his side of the family that's for sure!!! It's so sad in a way cos we all get on so well but I know this will cause problems when it shouldn't but I guess their loss cos it won't be mine.My family will be happy especially our 2 kids and to me that's all that matters but still would love everyone else to be happy too.Wish you all the best and keep in touch xx

 

[whispernikki]

Hi Nikki,great to hear from you It's hard not to worry what they will think,I remember before I fell pregnant that I couldn't care less what anyone thought but now we are here I'm dreading it!I honestly can't see his children being happy at all but at the end of day it's nothing to do with them guess you can't please everyone!How far on are you?I'm 8 weeks but not saying anything until after the scan and ave decided will get all the tests one too.Hope all goes well for you too,keep in touch xx

im 5 weeks now luvie, im going to wait until 12 weeks then tell, but i think my children are going to guess before as i am soooo bloated...my doctor is arranging a scan in the next couple of weeks cant wait! will certainly keep in touch Dee and hope all goes well with u too ! x

 

[DeeM73]

Oh that's great Bet you're so excited about the scan! I'm at the midwife on Friday will be 9 weeks then A little bit nervous believe it or not!!! I guess it's like starting all over again! Oh yeah keep in touch that would be fab xx

 

[fuffyburra]

Hey guys Just an update: Ex wife obviously wasn't impressed, and has told all and sundry her version of events and how OH doesn't care about his other kids now that we're having another one. Luckily I think most people realise she's a bit of a dragon about it as it's not the first time she's done this behind OH's back.

Anyway, unfortunately her daughter (OH's step daughter) is struggling with it, I think she just feels stuck between her mum and dad and as she's nearly 30 she feels she's becoming a bit of a sounding board So she's not taken it that well, but OH's 16 year old son took it really well and doesn't really seem to mind all that much. He even said that he's been thinking of moving in with us recently I hope he does, I'd love to have him live with us and I think OH would give his right arm to have him here lol.

So, there's our little update! I really hope everyone else is alright and people are dealing with your fabulous news There have been times in the past few weeks where I've wondered if it really IS great news, but so many people we've told have got so excited about it, and it makes me remember how lucky we are and how wonderful life is about to become

Good luck guys keep in touch x x

 

[DeeM73]

Aww I'm so glad that it went well apart from the ex wife but then you would kind of expect that.It was only a matter of time before it would backfire on her so to speak.I'm so happy his son took it well I'm sure the daughter will come round too.That's the way I feel thinking is it really 'great news' cos you always expect the worst comments,I just hope it goes well for us when we finally do.Maybe I'll stop worrying!!!! xx

 

[fuffyburra]

Thanks yeah we knew she wouldn't take it well. Everyone else is super chuffed!

It'll be fine for you guys, people loves babies. No one can be mad about one for long

Good luck let us know how it goes! x x

 

[Animaniacs]

I haven't told many people yet for this reason. I am nearly 22 weeks and have not told my kids, work, relatives, or friends. I plan to tell my kids very soon, and work by the end of the month. I don't really care if extended family don't find out until I see them, maybe at Thanksgiving; the baby is due in January. We will be the first couple in two to three generations to have more than two kids.

No one was very supportive when I mentioned we were going to try for another. My MIL told me that I finally got my way (hubby was on the fence for a while). People can be really cruel with their comments, so tell them when and if you feel it's right. That said, my mom, siblings, etc. have been pretty good about it. Try to not get too hurt, though. It's your life, your baby.

 

[DeeM73]

No one was supportive when we mentioned trying for another,my husband mentioned it to his kids and the sniggering started,saying we'll be like some of the families that are on talk shows.I was really hurt by that and made me more determined so to speak!My husband will be telling them not me but I would love to see the reaction!You're right it's our life and as long as we are happy and our 2 kids then that's all that matter,if his kids can't be happy then too bad that's life,well certainly keep you posted!xx

 

[fuffyburra]

Wow 3 kids isn't even that many!! good luck telling them all, once it's over there's an enormous sense of relief! x x

 

[DeeM73]

We only have 2 kids but my husband has 4 and they are all grown up.Thanks I'll need all the luck!!!! xx

 

[fuffyburra]

Hey any news yet? x x

 

[DeeM73]

Still not had my scan yet so no news yet I'm afraid Will keep you posted!!! xx

 

[Animaniacs]

Good luck, Dee! I'm 23 weeks tomorrow, and am going to tell work this week. Have to tell my kids, too. I can't believe they don't know yet, but they are little themselves. I know they will be happy, but I can't think of a special way to tell them... It was much easier when my daughter was 16 months old and I had my son. She was way too young to know anything was changing.

 

[DeeM73]

Thanks Will have to tell them after the scan,it will be a relief not to hide anything!! You're right so much easier when they are younger I'm sure they will be happy but not so sure about my husband's family xx

 

[goingloopy]

Hi, I have a grumpy mum to!! I was dreading telling her n dad, I have a 15yr son and 11yr daughter and 4yr stepson who lives with us full time, I ended up surprised by the reaction they were happy! mind you I went in 'Ive got some news and we are happy so thats all that matters' lol She is a 77yr old Irish lady who says it like it is, and has made a few comments since that if someone else heard them they would be shocked I just refused to discuse 'getting rid of a disabled kid' or 'dont buy a pram till its born and you know its alive'
The thing that bugs me the most is everyone I have told has said 'oh was it planned?' I am more then capable of not getting pregnant if I dont want to!!!

Any congratulations everyone on your wonderfull news and ignore the misroble gits!! x

 

[DeeM73]

My family will be happy but it's my husband's that I'm not so sure about You're right though as long as we are happy then that's all that matters and no doubt will get the snide comments 'was it planned'!!! Just want it all out in the open now instead of worrying what people will say but at the end of the day who really gives a dam!!! But still!!! ha ha when are you due? xx

 

[goingloopy]

Im sure he will be happy!! Im due 2nd April, when are you?

 

[DeeM73]

Well fingers crossed his family will be fine!I'm due 21 April,my son was born on the 4th of April x