appalled

[babyjiva]

I wanted to get a job at a local nursery. I know the owner and she said I could take care of the babies/toddlers in my LO's age group so she could come with me, just three hours a day. I said "fine. this is perfect for play dates because I'll get paid too." The only gliche was she wanted me to practice leaving LO in there without me for 30 minutes at a time for two days just so she could get used to the other teachers in there and this gave me some time to look over the handbook and do a little training. Literally as I'm reading the handbook I read this " employees should never tell the parents that their child had a bad day at nursery." I was shocked. I've worked at other nurseries and have seen the way the employees talk to the parents, not fully truthful with them, but I could not believe that this rule was in the handbook. Needless to say, I confronted the director of the school and told her I thought it was an awful policy and that it made me not want to ever leave LO, for even 30 minutes. the job didn't really work out.

 

[LittleBoo]

What the?! I'll be asking LO's nursery if they have the same policy, tbh I know he's a little monkey at home and from what they've said he's a completely different person, eats all his veg etc, have always doubted that tbh. Is it like that everywhere??

 

[Blah11]

weird Amelies nursery has told me a few times if shes not had a great day - once cos she wasnt sharing and once cos she wasnt well and was just sitting on her own and cried if anyone came near her.

 

[mum22ttc#3]

Yer DD2's nursery have told me if shes had an off day too, Ive also overheard them tell other parents if their kids have too.

 

[lozzy21]

When i worked at nurserys we wouldent tell them of minor issues, every child has off days but if there were major issues we would tell them.

 

[Mrs Doddy]

I guess it depends on what the 'bad day' was about

 

[babyjiva]

thanks. i was wondering if all child care places were like this or just ours here. i'd like to hear from more people that work at nurseries and if your handbook said something similar?

 

[RainbowDrop_x]

That's very strange. Did she say why that's policy?

 

[Cassie.]

I work in a nursery and we always tell the parents if the children haven't been themselves. What an odd rule.. your child could have fallen over, been really upset or been unwell and you wouldn't know

 

[jojo_b]

Does she not just mean that you shouldn't word it as "a bad day", as obviously this would be distressing? Surely she just means that you'd downplay it, so as not to make the parents worry? x x

 

[Connah'sMommy]

That sounds wrong to me, Nursery always tell me if Connah has had a bad day

you were right to bring it up!xx

 

[babyjiva]

oh i definitely know it's wrong. i'm glad to hear that's not normal at all. yes when I confronted her she said it was so parents wouldn't worry and I told her that I thought it's important for parents to know how their kids are doing so that they can make informed decisions about how to handle it. She agreed with me and said she'd reword it in the handbook, but I really can't trust the teachers there now to be honest with me. i was concerned this was normal policy…. i'm so relieved to know that it's not

 

[Mum2b_Claire]

Ruby's childminder would always say if Ruby had been grumpy. But if she was really unhappy for hours at a time I'd want to be called to collect her because that's not like her.

 

[Odd Socks]

Bella was at a childminder before I went on maternity leave & the cm let me know how she was getting on. She'd say if bella had been grouchy & she called me once when bella had chickenpox (cm was happy to have her as her boy also had it) & because bella was very unsettled I picked her up.

I would hate for bella to be unhappy & me not be told about it.

xx

 

[Baby France]

I've been told if my LO's have struggled or been little monkeys.

I'd rather know too...I mean who seriously is going to benefit from NOT knowing?

It just doesn't make sense

 

[Mum2b_Claire]

If I had the slightest suspicion that I WOULDN"T be told if Ruby had been unhappy, I'd panic constantly! I work on the basis that they'd tell me if she wasn't happy there, and as they don't, I relax.

 

[Baby France]

Hmmm I see what you mean. So if they make out that a child is happy there the parents won't be inclined to take the child out of their care.

Surely you'd have a child that would be upset and screaming all the time? If your child was that unhappy they would kick off at every drop off time, if that was still going on 4 months after they started it would be obvious then though wouldn't it?

 

[sam*~*louize]

I thought same as JoJo maybe they worded it as don't describe it as BAD day, same s we can't label children naughty etc etc etc. But christ if a child has a bad/unsettled/angry/off day then we tell the parents! They need to know, same as we ask them to tell us how they been at home over weekend/overnight?

 

[keepontrying]

I think the possible reason why this policy was in place was to prevent the oh so common issue of tactless younger staff passing over a message that sounds like a child has been terribly upset that day when in fact they may have just had a few grumpy patches or been upset over something....

We always train staff that whilst its important to passover factual and correct information its so neccassary to do it in the correct manner... parents ofetn batle with guilt issues when leaving their child at nursery, thats understandable - the last thing they want is a barrage of insensitive, worrying messages at the end of the day ... no child has a completely sad day (well very very rarely) so its important to also include the positives too....

Its the same if you have a concern about a child, you never raise it like you were casually taking to one of your pals or scare monger a parent....

 

[Pearls18]

Our nursery tells me when Elliot has a bad day, makes me feel guilty lol but at least I believe them when he's had a good day! My SIL works in a nursery and they have the policy that if LO does something major like their first steps they don't tell the parent so not to take it away from them, so when they do it at home it's like the first time, I don't like this really because I'd be proud of LO and would rather know asap whether I was there or not....maybe that's just me.