Beware! Rant inside! :)

[FrenchyMummy]

I have been in a terrible mood this week, AF+being knackered from work means that I am the grumpiest person on the planet: is it me or this this trying for a baby lark can be really stressful? We tried preseed last month and somehow I convince myself that it was going to be our lucky month. It wasn't. So now I am annoyed. But I shouldn't be as officially we are only NTNP, not TTCing. But I AM annoyed and disappointed, and so is my OH.
We have decided to start temping this month, but at the back of my mind I think that it will put me into the obsessive TTCer category so I am a bit reluctant to. But I do want a baby...

.. and the list of internal monolgues goes on and on and on!! I think I am going mad. Somebody call the men in white for me please!!

Grrrrrrrrrrrrr, this is so frustrating!!

Anyway, how is everybody doing? please tell me I am not the only one going loopy!

 

[lalitas charm]

Hi there,

We've just only started ntnp for #2 but I remember how stressed I got when I got a bfn last time and we weren't doing any of the temping etc. It is really soul destroying and when you are ttc you seem to see 100s of pregnant women and babies everywhere you go which only serves to make you obsess all the more over symptoms and makes the crash after getting your AF or a bfn all the more crushing.

BUT..... when you do get your bfp all that fades away to a distant memory while you plan your pregnancy and pretty much your baby's entire life before you're even 20wks preg lol.

I'm being all calm and reasonable atm as I'm resigned to this month not being our turn but ask me next month 2-3 days into the dreaded 2ww and I promise that the men in the white coats will be chasing me down too.

If you are temping why dont you use fertility friend to monitor it? I was about to start using it when I got my bfp last time but I've heard loads of good things about it.

 

[lemna]

I'm going through the same thing. I'm having to go off meds and decrease the caffeine - which is stressful by itself. And I'm only halfway through my cycle. I thought I was going to be relaxed, but trying to watch for signs of ov was driving me crazy so I broke down and bought an opk.

Trying to resist becoming an OCD TTCer...

 

[FrenchyMummy]

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah, Thanks girls! (big sigh of relief)

Lalitas I definitely appreciate the "been there" message, I feel like there will be a light at the end of the crazy tunnel.. I don't consider myself as TTC, but maybe if it bothers me so much I should stop being in denial and accept that yes, we are trying for a baby, and no, nothing is happening so far. Btw, Bethan is a lovely name!
When you are on your own-I live very far away from all my family-it can get very isolating to have all these things going through your mind. What would we do without BnB, he?!

Hi Lemna and thanks for your reply, I promise I will not turn into OCD TTCer (which made me laugh out loud!). I got some opks too but haven't been using them. Think I will this month, might as well as I will be temping too (after 10 months of NTNP I would like to make sure I am Oving). Well it is great to know that I am not the only one who doesn't know what to do with all her thoughts, maybe we should start meditation or something??!

 

[SyllyPoohBear]

I totally understand. The Hubby is like whatever happens happens.. But in the back of our minds we gear ourselves up to be pregnant and it's not whatever happens happens for us. It is much more then that. Carrying a child has great responsibility. And we want to do what's best for our bodies too. I love fertility friend. I use it it's really great. Good way to track and remember what your body is doing. I'm sorry your stressed. Try to find someway to relax take a nice hot bath or read a book.. Good luck. XX

 

[FrenchyMummy]

Thank you SillyPoohBear, you are totally right, I should relax and do something else. Going to grab a book and go read on our bed, it is the comfiest and most relaxing place in our house (hubby is playing a very loud fighting game on PS3 as I am typing this..)
I will check out Fertility Friend, I am determined to not be defeated!

 

[NotNic]

Oh FrenchyMummy - are you going over to the dark side? He he! I don't know if we can be friends if you're going to get all knowledgeable on me!

Seriously though I can understand why you want to. My OH got chatting to a woman on holiday who enlightened him on ovulation kits (no I don't know how that came up in conversation either ), and I'm now fighting a bit of a monster with him and all his newly found conceiving info! We (I!) don't really want to go down that route yet, but we're actively doing more BD'ing at the right time, and have discussed looking at that if we're not pg by end of August. Though I don't know if hubby would be able to cope with waiting that long.

By the way Lalitas. I am totally being stalked by pregnant ladies atm!

 

[lalitas charm]

Lol, it really does feel like they're everywhere doesn't it!! From the moment you decide to have a baby they immediately pop up!! And then when it is you sporting the bump or tiny baby and people are looking at you funny you'll develop a slight paranoia about which ever pregnancy effect bothers you most and be convinced that all those soothing things your DH tells you when you ask if you look like a whale are lies to make you feel better lol. When really it was all ppl ttc and jealous as hell lol

 

[Jaybug0115]

You do not realize the stress we put ourselves under when ttc concieve. Knowing that I'm stepping back from the opks or anything else related to knowing when I'm ovulating this cycle .... My body and mind feel so relaxed. When I conceived my first two wasnt even thinking about it. But all the symptom spotting and obsessive thinking must have real not been good for my body or reproductive process. And I'm only speaking for me. Because I know everyone is different but it is so nice to have other things occupy my time and thoughts. I honestly feel so free and I can feel that I'm not all tensed up like I was the last cycles ttc. Kick back relax and enjoy life and your dh. I don't know if this will be our month but it's okay with me, I know it will happen. And in the mean time I'm not letting all the thinking of conceiving get in the way. The way I figure it. It has worked twice in the past so letting it slide off my shoulders and not thinking about is going to be my ticket.