MarchBaby15
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- Joined
- Aug 8, 2014
- Messages
- 7
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First time poster here with emotional story so go easy girls! Background: Back in March I found my long lost first love online. He was always what I thought of as the one. No one was as special as him before him or since. We were so in love, together for 3 years when I was a teenager. We broke up because I moved away for college and I had not talked to him in 13 years. When I found him he was extactic to hear from me. He said he thought about me all time, missed me, still loved me, regretted the break up, the whole nine yards. So we began talking daily and I found out he has a long term girlfriend. I know this girl back when we were together she was always trying to hook up with him even though she knew he was with me and when I left she finally did. So I choose to ignore that he has a girlfriend because I felt that she didn't have a problem doing it to me so why should I care. Also this wasn't some fling to me I am thinking it was real love because it never went away after all these years. I lived about 1500 miles away and I risked it all to come back to my hometown ( where he lives ) to give it a second chance. So of course when I saw him I had high expectations. When I saw him it was nice but it felt more like we were starting over than picking up where we left off. Well we had sex ( 3 times in a row, all unprotected ) and now I am pregnant. Keep in mind he is in his later 30's, never married and doesn't have any other kids, but he said he really wanted them. Now that I am pregnant he is freaking out. Bad things - He is saying he has doubts if the baby is even his because I got pregnant so fast! ( I was not with anyone else its not possible ) He wont come see me to talk this out in person. He wont tell his girlfriend and/or break up with her. But he says he is scared but happy and wants me to keep the baby and wants to be in the baby's life. But I don't know to what extent or what he actually wants to do. I told him I want to raise the baby together and he doesn't say yes or no to that really. I think he is trying to buy time, but its not fair because I cant do that, and its at my expense because I need his support now. I am only 6 weeks pregnant so its still very new. But he is just not stepping up to this. It seems the person I fell in love with so long ago only exists in my memories, because that guy would never do this to me. I basically feel like he played me. But this is serious, this is someone's life we are talking about here. And like every Mother I want my child to have a wonderful life. This is really hurting me, I spend most my free time lying in bed crying and thinking about this. So what do I do? I could - Ignore him completely to avoid the stress and just have my lawyer contact him for a paternity test and child support once the baby is here. Or I could - Go tell his girlfriend he got me pregnant since he is not man enough to do it so I can force his hand to do something about this. Or I could - Beg and plead for us to move in together and take care of our baby and be happy just like we used to be. Or I could - Let him know he can come around when he wants ( doc's appts, things like that ) and just sit waiting for him to do that and hope be does the right thing. Or I could........ I don't know you tell me, I really don't know. I want what is best for the baby. Please no judgmental opinions ok, I followed my heart and it seems to have lead me wrong, please just give me some advice on fixing this.