Hayley90
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- Joined
- Nov 24, 2009
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Hey everyone! Hey beans
unfortunately this is a bit of a downer...my mood has taken a turn for the worse, and im starting to think there is something wrong with me
All week ive been feeling pretty down in the dumps, about most stuff. The snow (for a photographer, normally id be JUMPING FOR JOY!), the cold ( I LOVE Winter), food, sickness, sex, hugs, kisses, my fiance, and nothing can cheer me up.
i know its normal to get moody, but all the time? im only ever happy at work, and thats because i wouldnt dare be in a mood with them!! it wouldnt get me anywhere & they are really supportive, id have no reason to take it out on them - so why my family.
and today, i was on the phone to my mum & i get frustrated when people say "dont worry it'll all be fine" when i have worries - especially when they say " if you're worried you can talk to me"
so i was on the phone to mum;
-talking about my (supposedly) irrational and imaginitive fear of child labour, and that my midwife wont be the same as the one i know now?
-The fact there's a change my little bean could be autistic, because of OHs medical history & that he himself has autism.
-or that im worried about telling people when im 12 weeks (boxing day) when my scan isnt till 7th jan, so i wont know anything till then.
-and that so many people have problems having children, why i feel sad that im sick/tired/grumpy all the time when i wasn't prepared. i feel cruel, but at the same time i wish i wasnt...but i dont think i mean it. im so confused
-i have a trainee midwife who makes mistakes and a qualified midwife who might not even be looking after me because ive been referred to a consultant. can i not build up a relationship with SOMEONE throughout this? does it have to be someone new everytime?!!?
and so it goes on, the usual plus some extra hormonal stuff.
and all i get is "dont worry"
is it just me who thinks i should get more than a "dont worry" ? i started to cry so said bye and hung up, but i feel a bit cheated - why does no one understand and i hate saying this ,but why me ?
ugh. sorry its such a long post...im probably just over reacting
xox
unfortunately this is a bit of a downer...my mood has taken a turn for the worse, and im starting to think there is something wrong with me
All week ive been feeling pretty down in the dumps, about most stuff. The snow (for a photographer, normally id be JUMPING FOR JOY!), the cold ( I LOVE Winter), food, sickness, sex, hugs, kisses, my fiance, and nothing can cheer me up.
i know its normal to get moody, but all the time? im only ever happy at work, and thats because i wouldnt dare be in a mood with them!! it wouldnt get me anywhere & they are really supportive, id have no reason to take it out on them - so why my family.
and today, i was on the phone to my mum & i get frustrated when people say "dont worry it'll all be fine" when i have worries - especially when they say " if you're worried you can talk to me"
so i was on the phone to mum;
-talking about my (supposedly) irrational and imaginitive fear of child labour, and that my midwife wont be the same as the one i know now?
-The fact there's a change my little bean could be autistic, because of OHs medical history & that he himself has autism.
-or that im worried about telling people when im 12 weeks (boxing day) when my scan isnt till 7th jan, so i wont know anything till then.
-and that so many people have problems having children, why i feel sad that im sick/tired/grumpy all the time when i wasn't prepared. i feel cruel, but at the same time i wish i wasnt...but i dont think i mean it. im so confused
-i have a trainee midwife who makes mistakes and a qualified midwife who might not even be looking after me because ive been referred to a consultant. can i not build up a relationship with SOMEONE throughout this? does it have to be someone new everytime?!!?
and so it goes on, the usual plus some extra hormonal stuff.
and all i get is "dont worry"
is it just me who thinks i should get more than a "dont worry" ? i started to cry so said bye and hung up, but i feel a bit cheated - why does no one understand and i hate saying this ,but why me ?
ugh. sorry its such a long post...im probably just over reacting
xox