Breastfeeding a 2 year old

[MrsHedgehog]

I'm still nursing my 2 year old little girl but it's starting to become a source of frustration for me and my LO. She hardly feeds during the day anymore but still wants to nurse to sleep and when she wakes up. She also wakes up several times through the night. She used to just wake up, have a quick feed, and go back to sleep. Now she wants to nurse on both sides and even then she will cry wanting more. It's really uncomfortable for me now when she's just comfort sucking. I don't know if she's hungry and wants more milk or if she just wants the comfort. She eats quite well during the day and if I offer her water in the night she refuses. I've tried explaining to her that there's no more milk and mummy's boobies need to go to sleep but she doesn't get it and is getting more and more upset when I tell her she can't have anymore milk. I'm not sure what to do anymore. I feel like it might be best for everyone if we stopped completely but I'd ideally like to be feeding her just before bed and in the morning when she wakes up. I don't know how to stop her nursing in the night though without her screaming the place down.

 

[superfrizbee]

Can you send OH in in the night with a cup of cows milk? I think if you want her to accept that tbere's no milk at night you have to not give in and feed her otherwise no, she wont believe the boobies need sleep. That said I know it's hard in the middle of the night when youve got a crying toddler.and all you want to do is go back to sleep, that's why I though you could enlist OHs help (maybe for a week when he:s off work if that's a problem?).

 

[stephx]

My LO was bottle fed but when I stopped giving her nighttime milk we had to stop cold turkey, took 2 nights of hell but after that she was fine. In my experience there is no easy way x

 

[Brieanna]

Sorry no advice, just empathy. We are going through this right now and I have the same wish as you, to offer before bed and in the morning, but not a million times throughout the night! Sometimes my LO wants to comfort suck all night too and I don't get enough sleep. Since I am expecting again I need my sleep and my boobs are really sore too!

I am thinking the cold turkey way might have to be the way to go for me. LO doesn't drink anything but water which she refuses at night too. I might even start trying to get LO to take a pacifier (she never liked them)! I am waiting to try things out until after our week long roadtrip halfway across the country. Hopefully something works for you in the meantime.

 

[noon_child]

I couldn't tell from your post whether LO is crying when you stop her from comfort sucking or whether she is crying having finished the feed because there is no milk left?

I got to the point where I couldn't stand the comfort sucking (too many teeth!) so did Pantly Pulloff whenever she went from proper sucking to comfort sucking. But this won't work if she is genuinely hungry! Does she eat well in the day (a good percentage of three meals and two snacks)?

I agree with the others that using partners or husbands is a godsend when it comes to breaking the association. I kept night feeding while it worked, because it worked so well for teething and for illness, but if it isn't even working then it seems redundant not exploring other ways to conmfort her.

 

[MommyJogger]

Have you looked at Dr. Jay Gordon's method of starting with a set number of hours that the breast is not available at night? Have a google search of it, it might be the gentle, gradual approach that will help you cut down the night feeds without giving up nursing if you're not ready to do so. He says it's for those who use the family bed, but if you don't, I think it would take very little modification to apply to your situation. You might have a few rough nights of less sleep for yourself if you of your OH are up comforting her, but I think long term it would help resolve your issue without having her weaned. I would continue to offer water, esp if your heating is on. I know my throat gets dry frequently at night in the winter. If she uses a sippy cup well, perhaps make sure that there's a sippy of water available at her leisure.
Is this a recent thing? Perhaps her second set of molars are starting to move/bulge? That could especially be the case if her latch is getting messy and causing pain again.
Good luck!

 

[MrsHedgehog]

I couldn't tell from your post whether LO is crying when you stop her from comfort sucking or whether she is crying having finished the feed because there is no milk left?

I got to the point where I couldn't stand the comfort sucking (too many teeth!) so did Pantly Pulloff whenever she went from proper sucking to comfort sucking. But this won't work if she is genuinely hungry! Does she eat well in the day (a good percentage of three meals and two snacks)?

I agree with the others that using partners or husbands is a godsend when it comes to breaking the association. I kept night feeding while it worked, because it worked so well for teething and for illness, but if it isn't even working then it seems redundant not exploring other ways to conmfort her.

She cries when I stop her from comfort sucking. She used to nurse to sleep and was pretty easy to unlatch after she'd had enough milk. She's never been one to want to comfort suck all night. Now though, she just wants to suck and suck and lies there with her eyes wide open. It's like the milk isn't comforting her like it used to. She eats quite well during the day but she'll behave this way at night wether she's eaten loads or eaten nothing at all. DH is away just now with work but will definitely try to get him to have a go when he gets back.

 

[MrsHedgehog]

Have you looked at Dr. Jay Gordon's method of starting with a set number of hours that the breast is not available at night? Have a google search of it, it might be the gentle, gradual approach that will help you cut down the night feeds without giving up nursing if you're not ready to do so. He says it's for those who use the family bed, but if you don't, I think it would take very little modification to apply to your situation. You might have a few rough nights of less sleep for yourself if you of your OH are up comforting her, but I think long term it would help resolve your issue without having her weaned. I would continue to offer water, esp if your heating is on. I know my throat gets dry frequently at night in the winter. If she uses a sippy cup well, perhaps make sure that there's a sippy of water available at her leisure.
Is this a recent thing? Perhaps her second set of molars are starting to move/bulge? That could especially be the case if her latch is getting messy and causing pain again.
Good luck!

I think she is getting her molars so that could be whats causing the change in her usual nursing habits. It's been going on for a month or so. She never lets me look in her mouth though so I can't tell for sure!