Buddy wanted...over 35...ttc!

[goddess25]

Fingers crossed for this month. Its good to keep busy and take your mind off the 2WW. Good Luck!

 

[goddess25]

HOw are you all doing?

 

[gretarose]

Hello, I feel like I've been away for a while!...been pretty busy at work and my husband had to have a corrective shoulder operation so been looking after him. He's got his sperm test on the 25th and since we made the appointment I have been feeling much better about the whole thing.
I mean, I still get a little anxious when I think that I am 38 this September and we've been trying for almost 2 years...and I think about my tiny pregnancy 10 years ago with my ex and how I miscarried after 12 weeks, then we split up not long after. I guess some old wounds have resurfaced. But its good to have a clear out I guess :O)
Its good to hear how everyone is doing. I've been a little coldy and tired this week but approaching my OV so trying to take it easy and pamper myself a little.
Big hopes and dreams to everyone xxx

 

[Sakura_Saku]

I've been away for awhile, too, and of course - no luck yet.
Actually, I kind of gave up hope the last few months.
At first, I had been giving up caffeine and alcohol of any kind as the window of opportunity came closer for a few months, but since nothing's been happening no matter how good I try to be, I just say the hell with it now.

I had a strange thought, and almost a revelation of sorts. I'm a little afraid to say it here because I don't want anyone to become offended or take it the wrong way. It's just something I have come to wonder about:

Do any of you watch Mad Men?
I started watching from the first season a couple of months ago and saw all of the pregnant women in it smoking and drinking as if it were nothing. That was back in the 60s, before women were commanded to give up anything and everything they enjoyed in order to supposedly have a healthy baby. Seems a lot of folks born in the 60s have been healthy as horses, even without the precautions we take nowadays when we become pregnant, or even as we're trying to. Right?....In contrast, I see all the time articles and news reports about cases all over the spectrum of autism being on the rise. They still don't know what's causing it, and it hasn't been proven with 100% certainty that it's related to vaccines (that's a hotly debated topic, though, as I'm sure most of you already know!)....In considering all of this, something came to my mind:

Do you think, by any stretch of the imagination, that doctors telling women to stop everything cold turkey the second they discover that they're pregnant could have anything to do with it? We know what hell it can put us through as fully grown adults to suddenly quit coffee one day. What might that kind of withdrawal do to a developing embryo and fetus inside us? Obviously too much caffeine, for instance, is bad for us, but if we've been drinking a couple a' cups a morning for the last 20 years, clearly our body has gotten used to it, right? As long as we're otherwise healthy, that is. How would it screw up our chemistry to just quit when we become pregnant? What about the occasional glass of red wine to keep the heart disease away - as always - which has not been hurting us for however many years? I think you know what I'm getting at, in wondering if making sudden changes to a body chemistry that has been balanced quite nicely all along would send a shock to the system that might actually harm the little ones inside us.

Again, this is just something that occurred to me, and I'm not trying to soapbox it as a certain belief or anything...Just kind of wondering, you know?
We sure know that through the ages doctors were a lot less particular about women's pregnancy care, but loads and loads of us turned out just fine through it all anyway! XD Sorry if that was boring.

Anyway, after realizing and rethinking all of this, I decided that I'm going to just not worry about it until I know for absolutely certain of a BFP someday. I drink a single cup of coffee with powder cream and sugar in the morning, and very rarely in the afternoons, and I like the occasional glass of beer or glass of wine a few times a week, if that, so I don't think my intake of "bad stuff" is all that terrible to begin with. I just don't want to spend so much time building up to something that may never happen, I think. I have a feeling that quitting everything, having AF kick in, starting up my usual habits again and then going through the whole thing every month all over again will become depressing really quickly, and I really don't want trying to have a baby to become a depressing thing. At all.

Heheh, actually it reminds me - a friend of mine with a super cute, totally healthy 5 year old daughter told me the story about how she found out she was pregnant (she was a surprise! - they already have two kids and weren't trying for another) one morning with a cigarette hanging on her lip, a cup of coffee in one hand and the pregnancy test in the other. XD All of her kids are fine and healthy so who's to say what's going to be right or wrong for each individual, right?

Anyway, I hope my babbling didn't rub anyone the wrong way. It's just things I've been thinking about as I've become more anxious that we might not be able to make this happen.

As things stand, I believe I am about 3 dpo right now.
I felt a nasty pinch on my left side on Wednesday morning when I woke up. We had bd'd the night before, as chance actually would have it because it wasn't quite 14 days yet, and did again last night, just to try to seal the deal. My cycles have been less than predictable the last few months, and I think I actually had an anovulatory cycle last month. Didn't feel a thing. Trying to track my basal temp is useless since I sleep with my mouth open most of the time. It never changes, so I gave it up last month. Really learned to hate Fertility "Friend," too. What kind of friend won't even let you manually enter your ovulation date because it decided on its own that it doesn't like your temps? More like Fertility Jerk. So I don't know what's going on, but I've been tired and napping every afternoon for the last nearly two weeks now since AF ended. Just feeling listless. Very little inspiration to cook dinner, clean, etc. Things I usually enjoy doing. I am prone to bouts of depression, though, so it makes me wonder if it's kicking in again, and I'm not sure how to break out of it. I went on a 5 hour hike along a mountainside yesterday to try to break out of it, but I feel like death warmed over the next day here. Very strange. I've been having lower back pain for the last week, but I can only feel it when I'm lying down in bed. That's not normal unless it's to do with AF. NOW, starting today, I have had a strange lower abdominal pressure going on. It's not gas. It feels like AF cramps, honestly. They got pretty intense at one point this afternoon, but seem to feel a little better now. I realize it's way too early for it to possibly be implantation, but could it have anything to do with following ovulation? I don't know, but it's weird. I feel run down and horrible, and I've been emotionally wonky, too.

So there it is. I just wanted to come back and try to stay in the loop, but I feel like a straggler who's not been able to keep up with the pack and am ready to just collapse from exhaustion and call the whole thing quits.

I hope all of you are doing a lot better than I've been!!!

 

[gretarose]

I've been away for awhile, too, and of course - no luck yet.
Actually, I kind of gave up hope the last few months.
At first, I had been giving up caffeine and alcohol of any kind as the window of opportunity came closer for a few months, but since nothing's been happening no matter how good I try to be, I just say the hell with it now.

I had a strange thought, and almost a revelation of sorts. I'm a little afraid to say it here because I don't want anyone to become offended or take it the wrong way. It's just something I have come to wonder about:

Do any of you watch Mad Men?
I started watching from the first season a couple of months ago and saw all of the pregnant women in it smoking and drinking as if it were nothing. That was back in the 60s, before women were commanded to give up anything and everything they enjoyed in order to supposedly have a healthy baby. Seems a lot of folks born in the 60s have been healthy as horses, even without the precautions we take nowadays when we become pregnant, or even as we're trying to. Right?....In contrast, I see all the time articles and news reports about cases all over the spectrum of autism being on the rise. They still don't know what's causing it, and it hasn't been proven with 100% certainty that it's related to vaccines (that's a hotly debated topic, though, as I'm sure most of you already know!)....In considering all of this, something came to my mind:

Do you think, by any stretch of the imagination, that doctors telling women to stop everything cold turkey the second they discover that they're pregnant could have anything to do with it? We know what hell it can put us through as fully grown adults to suddenly quit coffee one day. What might that kind of withdrawal do to a developing embryo and fetus inside us? Obviously too much caffeine, for instance, is bad for us, but if we've been drinking a couple a' cups a morning for the last 20 years, clearly our body has gotten used to it, right? As long as we're otherwise healthy, that is. How would it screw up our chemistry to just quit when we become pregnant? What about the occasional glass of red wine to keep the heart disease away - as always - which has not been hurting us for however many years? I think you know what I'm getting at, in wondering if making sudden changes to a body chemistry that has been balanced quite nicely all along would send a shock to the system that might actually harm the little ones inside us.

Again, this is just something that occurred to me, and I'm not trying to soapbox it as a certain belief or anything...Just kind of wondering, you know?
We sure know that through the ages doctors were a lot less particular about women's pregnancy care, but loads and loads of us turned out just fine through it all anyway! XD Sorry if that was boring.

Anyway, after realizing and rethinking all of this, I decided that I'm going to just not worry about it until I know for absolutely certain of a BFP someday. I drink a single cup of coffee with powder cream and sugar in the morning, and very rarely in the afternoons, and I like the occasional glass of beer or glass of wine a few times a week, if that, so I don't think my intake of "bad stuff" is all that terrible to begin with. I just don't want to spend so much time building up to something that may never happen, I think. I have a feeling that quitting everything, having AF kick in, starting up my usual habits again and then going through the whole thing every month all over again will become depressing really quickly, and I really don't want trying to have a baby to become a depressing thing. At all.

Heheh, actually it reminds me - a friend of mine with a super cute, totally healthy 5 year old daughter told me the story about how she found out she was pregnant (she was a surprise! - they already have two kids and weren't trying for another) one morning with a cigarette hanging on her lip, a cup of coffee in one hand and the pregnancy test in the other. XD All of her kids are fine and healthy so who's to say what's going to be right or wrong for each individual, right?

Anyway, I hope my babbling didn't rub anyone the wrong way. It's just things I've been thinking about as I've become more anxious that we might not be able to make this happen.

As things stand, I believe I am about 3 dpo right now.
I felt a nasty pinch on my left side on Wednesday morning when I woke up. We had bd'd the night before, as chance actually would have it because it wasn't quite 14 days yet, and did again last night, just to try to seal the deal. My cycles have been less than predictable the last few months, and I think I actually had an anovulatory cycle last month. Didn't feel a thing. Trying to track my basal temp is useless since I sleep with my mouth open most of the time. It never changes, so I gave it up last month. Really learned to hate Fertility "Friend," too. What kind of friend won't even let you manually enter your ovulation date because it decided on its own that it doesn't like your temps? More like Fertility Jerk. So I don't know what's going on, but I've been tired and napping every afternoon for the last nearly two weeks now since AF ended. Just feeling listless. Very little inspiration to cook dinner, clean, etc. Things I usually enjoy doing. I am prone to bouts of depression, though, so it makes me wonder if it's kicking in again, and I'm not sure how to break out of it. I went on a 5 hour hike along a mountainside yesterday to try to break out of it, but I feel like death warmed over the next day here. Very strange. I've been having lower back pain for the last week, but I can only feel it when I'm lying down in bed. That's not normal unless it's to do with AF. NOW, starting today, I have had a strange lower abdominal pressure going on. It's not gas. It feels like AF cramps, honestly. They got pretty intense at one point this afternoon, but seem to feel a little better now. I realize it's way too early for it to possibly be implantation, but could it have anything to do with following ovulation? I don't know, but it's weird. I feel run down and horrible, and I've been emotionally wonky, too.

So there it is. I just wanted to come back and try to stay in the loop, but I feel like a straggler who's not been able to keep up with the pack and am ready to just collapse from exhaustion and call the whole thing quits.

I hope all of you are doing a lot better than I've been!!!

Bless you for your honesty Saku...it's so good to hear from you and I echo a lot of what you're saying! When I have more time I will respond more (I'm running out the door to work!) but just wanted to say hi and take good care of yourself at the moment hunny. x

 

[Butterflies37]

Hello ladies,

If its ok, I would love to join this fabulous group!

I congratulate you all with the strength, perserverance and positive attitudes you are all sending to those TTC!

I am also 37 years old and TTC #1 with DH of almost 2 years.

I had a laparoscopy done in March for stage 3 endometriosis with a cyst removed from my left ovary and should be starting Gonal-F next cycle. (FX that I don't have to).

Good luck to you all and baby dust sent your way!

Take care

 

[septbride]

Welcome, Butterflies! Nice to meet you. What is Gonal-F supposed to be like? My DH and I are just now planning our first trip to the fertility clinic, so I'm not familiar with the different hormones yet (other than Clomid -- very familar with that one )

Hello ladies,

If its ok, I would love to join this fabulous group!

I congratulate you all with the strength, perserverance and positive attitudes you are all sending to those TTC!

I am also 37 years old and TTC #1 with DH of almost 2 years.

I had a laparoscopy done in March for stage 3 endometriosis with a cyst removed from my left ovary and should be starting Gonal-F next cycle. (FX that I don't have to).

Good luck to you all and baby dust sent your way!

Take care

 

[goddess25]

Glad to hear your all doing fine.

Saku, I agree somewhat... i think these days we go over the top. I don't drink booze or coffee but I do like soda, so while pregnant with both kids I still drank diet soda, although I don't drink much a can every few days!. I did not quit all the foods that they tell you not to eat, I ate soft cheeses, deli meat and a few others on the bad list and all was well. I think as long as you do everything in moderation with common sense, then fine! I don't agree with smoking while pregnant but a glass of wine, cup of coffee or a beer every now and again, I can't see the harm!

 

[Butterflies37]

Hello,

Thank you Septbride! Gonal-f is an injection to induce more ovulation (eggs) although I am ovulating on my own every month.

We started going to a specialist about 8 months ago and have undergone an HSG and a laparoscopy along with blood tests and DH has done a few SA.

Good Luck with your 1st visit to the fertility clinic.

Keep us posted.

 

[septbride]

Hi everyone,

Hope you ladies had a nice Memorial Day weekend. We were away at a friend's farm and I was O'ing, so we gave it our all!

Our trip to the fertility clinic on Friday was interesting -- the doctor recommends that we skip straight to IVF! I was shocked -- thought for sure she would suggest IUI first. But it looks like we'll be doing the IVF thing over the summer. Kinda freaked out but glad to get things moving....

How is everyone else doing?

 

[goddess25]

Septbride - that's quite the development. Congratulations! When are you planning the IVF.

 

[goddess25]

Hope your all doing well.

This is my first actual cycle TTC. I have just been gate crashing up till now.

Fingers crossed. I have always been very very lucky so far, to conceive 4 times within the first cycle or the second. If I am not pregnant by the end of July I know I am going to be devastated but I also know being realistic now that I am 38 that it is also very unlikely.

How is everyone else doing?

 

[septbride]

Hi goddess, we are planning to start IVF in July if all goes well. I am quite worried because I just got my AMH levels checked and they are extremely low. I just hope that we can still move forward with IVF now. I'm on pins and needles until my next appointment on the 15th!

Congrats on starting TTC! Hope you are as lucky as you have been in the past!

Septbride - that's quite the development. Congratulations! When are you planning the IVF.

 

[goddess25]

I hope so too but I know it would be extremely lucky to do that.

July is super close to start yay.. sorry your AMH levels are low I am sure they will still go ahead and do it.

 

[gretarose]

Hi ladies...it's been a while. Hope everyone doing ok?
I'm back here because I need a little help with something...my husband got his sperm test results back and they were very low, about 75% immobile. We are both pretty gutted, and he has been asked to go back for another test. However he seems to be stalling, and has even started smoking again (much to my disgust!)...it feels like for ages I was thinking there was something up with me and to our big surprise it seems to be a hiccup with him intstead. I want to get on with it but obviously he is experiencing a lack of confidence and is taking his time to book another appointment.
I'm trying to be supportive but it's hard, as he is pretty moody at the moment!
Has anyone else experienced this?
And also do you know what will be the procedure if the other test comes back saying the same??
Help! xxxx

 

[TTCinTexas]

Hi ladies...it's been a while. Hope everyone doing ok?
I'm back here because I need a little help with something...my husband got his sperm test results back and they were very low, about 75% immobile. We are both pretty gutted, and he has been asked to go back for another test. However he seems to be stalling, and has even started smoking again (much to my disgust!)...it feels like for ages I was thinking there was something up with me and to our big surprise it seems to be a hiccup with him intstead. I want to get on with it but obviously he is experiencing a lack of confidence and is taking his time to book another appointment.
I'm trying to be supportive but it's hard, as he is pretty moody at the moment!
Has anyone else experienced this?
And also do you know what will be the procedure if the other test comes back saying the same??
Help! xxxx

I GretaRose, I hope you don't mind me joining the site. We found out last week that my husbands motility was only 3%!! All my tests have come back healthy. After finding out that the issue is with his , my husband was upset. The first SA he did came back with only 2 million sperm and since that was so low they couldn't even do a motility check. Turns out it was a false alarm, the second test came back with 128 million but the very low motility.
I think for men, they have this belief that they are invinsible and as a man it's their duty to get us pregnant. When they can't, it's a major blow to their self esteem. The way I approached it with my husband was explaining to him that if the rolls were reversed and I was the one preventing us from getting pregnant, I'd feel defeated too. Neither partner wants to bear that burden, but I explained to him that his sperm being the issue is generally easier to deal with versus the woman having issues. And it doesn't make me love him any less.
Good luck!!! And I know you guys will work thru it.. It just takes time and communication!!

 

[Sakura_Saku]

I feel bad posting this, what with Greta's news just above...I'm really sorry to hear that. I bet your husband is just pissed and feeling less than manly right now (even though it's silly to, just because of low sperm count), but I bet he'll bounce back and get back on the wagon. Just give it a little time. Maybe a month of down time? I know none of us have that much time to spare... *hugs*

Well....My update is that after I became 2-3 days late, felt AF cramps coming, and even I took my usual ibuprofen bomb when the back pain really started kicking in....nothing ever actually happened....So I bought kind of a cheapo line test yesterday. Got a two pack, since I knew I wasn't going to be able to wait, and did it as soon as I got home yesterday afternoon. Even after having been drinking a lot of water all day (I supposedly have stressed out kidneys from too much salt, so I'm in the habit of drinking a good 2 liters a day at the very least), I took the test and two bright lines showed up right away.

BUT WAIT -

I took another test as soon as I woke up this morning, and the second line was lighter. It's there, but a lot lighter than the first test from the middle of the day yesterday. Not sure what that's about, but my husband and I are...cautiously optimistic. I joined this group with you all after having had a chemical pregnancy. We had gotten all excited, until one day it all just came down, and we were totally crushed. Nothing since February, and I had even gotten to feeling so hopeless about it, I stopped taking my vitamins. Wasn't being especially careful with my diet, either. Took up beer tasting as a hobby (only a few cans a week, or so, with dinner), and am drinking my usual fully caffeinated coffee, but only one cup a morning - loaded with sugar and fakey cream.

So, I'm going to the doc today, and he'll probably give me an ultrasound to see what's going on in there. I'm excited, but also really scared. Pounding the vitamins hard since yesterday, praying that it'll stick, or even be there at all. I constantly have a bloated, uncomfortable feeling in my abdomen, though the AF type cramps have mostly subsided.

I had no idea. None. NOW, in retrospect, the only thing I can think that was strange that happened was that I broke out terribly all over my face about two weeks ago. I attributed it to stress, and I had a few events to deal with that made me nervous. Also, I have not at all had an appetite for dinner, so I've been having a really hard time preparing it for when my husband gets home, but it's getting done. I'm just not eating it with the zest I usually would. I can't believe I couldn't even manage to enjoy a plate of curry rice (one of my favorites) last week...Now that WAS odd, now that I remember it. I don't feel sick or anything. Just that crampy, bloaty feeling 'round those parts, feeling as though AF could show up at any second.

So, I'm not holding my breath. I was so heartbroken by what happened in February, it's very difficult to get myself excited again without alternately wanting to sob my eyes out. I just wanted to let you know, and I hope what I'm saying isn't discouraging or a total downer to anyone. I'm not out of the woods yet, and I need to get a solid confirmation, first, since my body loves to play tricks on me as a rule.

I need to catch up on more of the messages here, but I hope you all have been doing ok!

 

[gretarose]

I feel bad posting this, what with Greta's news just above...I'm really sorry to hear that. I bet your husband is just pissed and feeling less than manly right now (even though it's silly to, just because of low sperm count), but I bet he'll bounce back and get back on the wagon. Just give it a little time. Maybe a month of down time? I know none of us have that much time to spare... *hugs*

Well....My update is that after I became 2-3 days late, felt AF cramps coming, and even I took my usual ibuprofen bomb when the back pain really started kicking in....nothing ever actually happened....So I bought kind of a cheapo line test yesterday. Got a two pack, since I knew I wasn't going to be able to wait, and did it as soon as I got home yesterday afternoon. Even after having been drinking a lot of water all day (I supposedly have stressed out kidneys from too much salt, so I'm in the habit of drinking a good 2 liters a day at the very least), I took the test and two bright lines showed up right away.

BUT WAIT -

I took another test as soon as I woke up this morning, and the second line was lighter. It's there, but a lot lighter than the first test from the middle of the day yesterday. Not sure what that's about, but my husband and I are...cautiously optimistic. I joined this group with you all after having had a chemical pregnancy. We had gotten all excited, until one day it all just came down, and we were totally crushed. Nothing since February, and I had even gotten to feeling so hopeless about it, I stopped taking my vitamins. Wasn't being especially careful with my diet, either. Took up beer tasting as a hobby (only a few cans a week, or so, with dinner), and am drinking my usual fully caffeinated coffee, but only one cup a morning - loaded with sugar and fakey cream.

So, I'm going to the doc today, and he'll probably give me an ultrasound to see what's going on in there. I'm excited, but also really scared. Pounding the vitamins hard since yesterday, praying that it'll stick, or even be there at all. I constantly have a bloated, uncomfortable feeling in my abdomen, though the AF type cramps have mostly subsided.

I had no idea. None. NOW, in retrospect, the only thing I can think that was strange that happened was that I broke out terribly all over my face about two weeks ago. I attributed it to stress, and I had a few events to deal with that made me nervous. Also, I have not at all had an appetite for dinner, so I've been having a really hard time preparing it for when my husband gets home, but it's getting done. I'm just not eating it with the zest I usually would. I can't believe I couldn't even manage to enjoy a plate of curry rice (one of my favorites) last week...Now that WAS odd, now that I remember it. I don't feel sick or anything. Just that crampy, bloaty feeling 'round those parts, feeling as though AF could show up at any second.

So, I'm not holding my breath. I was so heartbroken by what happened in February, it's very difficult to get myself excited again without alternately wanting to sob my eyes out. I just wanted to let you know, and I hope what I'm saying isn't discouraging or a total downer to anyone. I'm not out of the woods yet, and I need to get a solid confirmation, first, since my body loves to play tricks on me as a rule.

I need to catch up on more of the messages here, but I hope you all have been doing ok!

Thanks for your kind words lady and I really hope it all works out for you. You deserve it!! I've got my fingers and toes crossed for you xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

 

[Sakura_Saku]

Hey all, I'm back.

Just got back from my 7 week ultrasound and there was no growth seen since the last time. Surprise surprise. >_<;;; Instead of being sad, I'm angry. Raging, actually. I feel like I wasted the entire last two weeks trying to be careful for absolutely nothing. I missed an important community event that I was committed do, which only happens once a year, and they needed me for, for this. Which turned out to be nothing after all.

Scarier still is that even though we saw the little black bean looking thing stuck there, my doctor is still concerned that ectopic pregnancy might be there....How does that work? How can you have an ectopic pregnancy if the thing can be seen right there in the trans-vag ultrasound?...I might ask in whatever section of this forum is appropriate, because that sounds strange, and it's scaring me a little. If I come back with a positive pregnancy test still, I'll have to go to some strange hospital to have them deal with it...This is so invasive and not something I want to have to deal with. Just want it to end naturally and peacefully as possible.

So yeah....Nothing doing.
I guess we'll pick up and try again eventually, but I hardly have the heart for it again. I hope the rest of you are doing better, at least!!!

 

[gretarose]

Hey lady...so sorry for the delay...I guess a lot of people are away on holiday. I've been away for a month & only just read your message. Wishing you lots of peace & comfort through your tough time. I hope things are brighter for you & your man. Let me know. Well my husband finally went for his 2nd sperm test after poor result last time. I just wondered what the next stage for us will be if the results are the same. Will I need to go for y or will they refer us for IUI or IVF?? I feel clueless ladies...help! Xxx

Hey all, I'm back.

Just got back from my 7 week ultrasound and there was no growth seen since the last time. Surprise surprise. >_<;;; Instead of being sad, I'm angry. Raging, actually. I feel like I wasted the entire last two weeks trying to be careful for absolutely nothing. I missed an important community event that I was committed do, which only happens once a year, and they needed me for, for this. Which turned out to be nothing after all.

Scarier still is that even though we saw the little black bean looking thing stuck there, my doctor is still concerned that ectopic pregnancy might be there....How does that work? How can you have an ectopic pregnancy if the thing can be seen right there in the trans-vag ultrasound?...I might ask in whatever section of this forum is appropriate, because that sounds strange, and it's scaring me a little. If I come back with a positive pregnancy test still, I'll have to go to some strange hospital to have them deal with it...This is so invasive and not something I want to have to deal with. Just want it to end naturally and peacefully as possible.

So yeah....Nothing doing.
I guess we'll pick up and try again eventually, but I hardly have the heart for it again. I hope the rest of you are doing better, at least!!!