Well I have just found out that my sister is pregnant and this week I found out I have pcos. This was her very first month trying and she already has two children. I'm just so fucking devastated, I'm not interested in pretending to be happy for her because I'm not. I have to spend Christmas with her knowing she's pregnant and I'm not, and with no chance of getting pregnant for at least the next few months. I don't have any advice to ask for as there's nothing to say, I just don't know where else to turn as my husband doesn't properly understand why I'm sobbing into a pillow.
Can't stop crying
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spunky84
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I'm so sorry Talia 
I've felt the same things, though for different reasons (mc), but I get how hard it can be, especially when you've already had other news that you still need to wrap your head around. My DH never understood why I've cried over pregnancy news before, and I think that just makes it more difficult, especially it can be hard for those that haven't gone through things like that to understand. It just makes it feel even more lonely.
Wish I could give you a big I'm here if you need to talk
I've felt the same things, though for different reasons (mc), but I get how hard it can be, especially when you've already had other news that you still need to wrap your head around. My DH never understood why I've cried over pregnancy news before, and I think that just makes it more difficult, especially it can be hard for those that haven't gone through things like that to understand. It just makes it feel even more lonely.
Wish I could give you a big
I'm here if you need to talk 
Stargazer33
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I know I can't say anything to help at this moment but I want you to know we are all here if you need to talk💖 And I understand exactly how you feel, I was devastated when I got the news about my sister being pregnant and I lost my bean in mid September... I know the feeling hun.. And guys, well they don't fully get it because they're men.. They will never understand the feeling of being pregnant nor do they fully get what emotions we go through if we miscarry...
I hope you feel better hun
I hope you feel better hun
Thank you to both of you. It does help to know that others understand how I feel.
I just can't stop thinking about all the difficult things that are to come and how am I going to put on a brave face through all of it. I'm so angry with her even though I know it's irrational. I just want to cut myself off from my family but we are really close and obviously it's soon before Christmas too, I wouldn't ruin that for the rest of them by not going even though I don't know how I'm going to get through it, or any of the next nine months and beyond.
I just can't stop thinking about all the difficult things that are to come and how am I going to put on a brave face through all of it. I'm so angry with her even though I know it's irrational. I just want to cut myself off from my family but we are really close and obviously it's soon before Christmas too, I wouldn't ruin that for the rest of them by not going even though I don't know how I'm going to get through it, or any of the next nine months and beyond.
spunky84
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You get through it, even if it's not easy. Your heart is going to hurt. There may be days you're not going to want to face the world, may not want to get out of bed. I don't think there's anything in this world that will help with what you feel, but I think your husband, even if he doesn't understand, can end up being the biggest support for you. Maybe tell him that you know he doesn't understand what or how you're feeling or the extent of it, but sometimes just having a shoulder to cry on and to know that someone is there for you gets you through it.
My husband didn't get it. He would just tell me that's life and that I need to figure out a way to deal with it because it's not something I can ever escape. Even though it's the truth, hearing him say that and minimizing how I was feeling made it worse. While he never understood how it made me feel, once he stopped saying those things and learned to just listen and let me cry and hold me and just be there for me even if he had nothing he could say to comfort me, it truly made the world of difference.
I would be honest with your DH and tell him what you need for him to help you get through it. Even if you're not really sure yourself, you start finding what helps and doesn't help.
Even though it's been years for me, sometimes things still hit me hard. It's easier to deal with now, but every now and then things knock me off my feet.
You can PM me at any time, even if it's 8 months from now. Either way, please reach out as I think there are a lot of ladies here who understand can help be a support system
My husband didn't get it. He would just tell me that's life and that I need to figure out a way to deal with it because it's not something I can ever escape. Even though it's the truth, hearing him say that and minimizing how I was feeling made it worse. While he never understood how it made me feel, once he stopped saying those things and learned to just listen and let me cry and hold me and just be there for me even if he had nothing he could say to comfort me, it truly made the world of difference.
I would be honest with your DH and tell him what you need for him to help you get through it. Even if you're not really sure yourself, you start finding what helps and doesn't help.
Even though it's been years for me, sometimes things still hit me hard. It's easier to deal with now, but every now and then things knock me off my feet.
You can PM me at any time, even if it's 8 months from now. Either way, please reach out as I think there are a lot of ladies here who understand can help be a support system
Thank you so much...your kindness made me cry 
Dh said earlier I don't know what you want me to do I said nothing...he said I don't want you to be sad I said I am sad...I guess it's that cliche of men wanting to fix things when all we want is someone to listen. I also understand the fact he doesn't truly understand, our need for babies as women is primal when it comes, and sometimes overrides rational thought so I don't hold it against him that he doesn't get it. I knew that here all of you do get it, and then some.
Dh said earlier I don't know what you want me to do I said nothing...he said I don't want you to be sad I said I am sad...I guess it's that cliche of men wanting to fix things when all we want is someone to listen. I also understand the fact he doesn't truly understand, our need for babies as women is primal when it comes, and sometimes overrides rational thought so I don't hold it against him that he doesn't get it. I knew that here all of you do get it, and then some.
Hey Talia. Ive been in the exact same boat. My sister didnt even want kids and was in an unhealthy relationship and got pg. My husband and i have just recently started ttc #1 and ive also been diagnosed with PCOS. There is not much i can really say bcus i still get like that myself. Its just something on the inside deep down that you have to work on and come to a peace with. I know the hurt and i know its hard. Let out some steam in the vent thread, it helped me some.
Gypsy99
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There is no shame in crying and I definitely second what Spunky said. It is so hard for some people to understand. I have cried so many times this time, and my DH has not been the most supportive person through it all either. Quite frankly I've wanted to kick him in the balls a few times.
Anyway I think that it is perfectly reasonable for you to be upset. I am so sorry that this has happened. Major hugs for you xo
Anyway I think that it is perfectly reasonable for you to be upset. I am so sorry that this has happened. Major hugs for you xo
gwinnyblac
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I am really sorry that you were diagnosed with pcos.. is it treatable? what did your doctor say?
You sister is very lucky. as for me I am the sole reason I don't have kids, al of my life I spent working or enjoying empty and lazy evening with my hubby, when it was time to get pregnant it was too late. in my 46 years old there is only one option - egg donation.
for a woman who has been through such an awful first attempt experience I feel pretty fine, I don't get upset when I see someone who's pregnant but the thing is it has been a year and a half (if counting from the first day we thought about having kids) since I have started trying.. so maybe this is why I feel perfectly ok when my friends bring their kids to the party etc
but i can't say that i do not understand you, no, I feel you and your pain. be strong hun!
You sister is very lucky. as for me I am the sole reason I don't have kids, al of my life I spent working or enjoying empty and lazy evening with my hubby, when it was time to get pregnant it was too late. in my 46 years old there is only one option - egg donation.
for a woman who has been through such an awful first attempt experience I feel pretty fine, I don't get upset when I see someone who's pregnant but the thing is it has been a year and a half (if counting from the first day we thought about having kids) since I have started trying.. so maybe this is why I feel perfectly ok when my friends bring their kids to the party etc
but i can't say that i do not understand you, no, I feel you and your pain. be strong hun!
I hope you're doing well xx
I'm in the same boat, i have two sister inlaws who want a baby (one who already has a 2 year old) and i have been wanting one for much longer then both of them. I've always known being a mother is what i want/need to be so whenever someone announces a pregnancy its like a stab to the heart. I'm desperately hoping one of them doesnt announce it this christmas..
You're never alone and sometimes you need to remind yourself of that
You do need to try and be happy for your sister though, shes going to need you
I'm in the same boat, i have two sister inlaws who want a baby (one who already has a 2 year old) and i have been wanting one for much longer then both of them. I've always known being a mother is what i want/need to be so whenever someone announces a pregnancy its like a stab to the heart. I'm desperately hoping one of them doesnt announce it this christmas..
You're never alone and sometimes you need to remind yourself of that
You do need to try and be happy for your sister though, shes going to need you Similar threads
