can't take baby anywhere

[angelady]

i think i mentioned this before but couldn't find my thread or post...so thought i'd post again. (its a bit long, sorry!)

the first 3 months of LO's life i was easily able to go out to the coffee shop to soothe her to sleep and it would be a great break for me...basically could get as long a break as i needed depending on how long i stayed out. that started changing at ~ 3 months then i brought her to the mall because the combination of the lull of background noise plus moving her around walking in the pram would keep her calm and most of the time asleep.

however now, going out with LO is an absolute joke! she gets very fussy after ~ 2 hours of being awake, yet doesn't like to be put down and doesn't fall asleep on her own AT ALL. so it is very hard to be out now...once she has a bottle she wants to be up and played with -- she especially likes to walk up me like climbing a mountain until standing on my head...and i end up looking ridiculous when at the mall like that in the food court! and after all the playing, cooing, attention, etc...wont/can't sleep...and then the fussiness starts and she cannot help herself from whining/crying...and the longer we're out, the more inconsolable she becomes.

today was a-w-f-u-l. i had to go to cultural church service...after ~ 10 minutes of sitting in her carseat/stroller she can't stop fussing, gave paci, 2 bottles, paci +++ tried to keep her calm, then had to step out played with her at the back of the church -- sitting, holding, lying down and cycled her legs etc...brought her back in, in ~ 10 minutes same story, then my sister took her out. left there, went for dinner for sister's b-day...could barely keep her still by this point...now 2 more bottles later...she was in full out panic mode. we had to get our food packed, paid the bill and did the walk of shame out the door. she fell asleep almost as soon as we got home, extremely exhausted.

i know i've whined about this before, but she is just under 5 months and i so much would like to take her out to the mall or anything longer than 10 minutes without constant fussing that doesn't stop until i get her home, fed, and somehow put down. i hope the rest of my mat leave wont be like this, just trying to keep my baby calm. i feel like i'm not really doing much to help her developmentally this way...dont get to play with her alot except to avoid a fussing fit. and reading/storytelling? -- forgetaboutit.

i was hoping to eventually be able to take her to those nice little mommy/baby groups at the library and so, but i just dont see that being able to happen anytime soon. it just seems like all the other babies i see in the mall at comparable age to my LO are so much more settled than she is. i can't help but be worried and wonder when there will be a light at the end of the tunnel.

 

[greenbeans12]

Some babies are too hung strung to be expected to sit still in environments they aren't familiar with. I think the best thing you can do is when you go out to things she can participate in. Such as the park, water play, a play date, etc. Or maybe try getting her sleepy before going out. Play with her a good while, feed her, bathe her, and get her cozy in her carseat. Play soft music on the car ride over to where you're going so she is more relaxed. All you can really do is hope this phase passes quickly.

 

[tinytabby]

My lo is a very active baby too and it can be very awkward being in places where she needs to sit still, e.g. Restaurants. I try to make sure she gets to play a lot at home first before we go out, so that she does fall asleep in her pushchair. I also don't take her places that it would be frowned upon to have a wriggly, noisy baby. I also bring lots of toys with me.

Hope this helps.

 

[Nat0619]

I sympathise! Ciara has always been quite difficult out in public. Still gets fussy pretty quick now at 10 months. I've never been on a long shopping trip with her. I think she just gets fed up very easily. I'm afraid I just shop quick. Now that she's mobile too I think she doesn't like being confined in the pushchair x

 

[LilyValley]

Oh this sounds very stressful for you - could it be that she needs a stricter routine that you follow both in and out of the house? Her awake times might need to be shorter to stop her from getting overtired, the overactive play times suggest that she's overtired already. I'm no expert and don't want to preach but I've been adapting the EASY routine and life suddenly got easier for us, my LO is 3 months so things will change for us but when he has a bad day it's usually because I've changed his routine too much. I hope things get easier for you x

 

[izzlesnizzle]

My LO has been like this from day one! I cant go anywhere without some sort of a scene. I took her to baby massage, baby yoga, baby sensory and all were a complete nightmare. I would be the one at the back, not able to join in, walking her round, on/off the boob every 5 mins wondering if she hungry, wondering this/that, until i would just have to leave. Going out for lunch is almost impossible, it will always result in one of us having to leave and take her out while the other sits in the cafe/restaurant on their own or one of us not being able to eat until the lunch has gone cold. Shes 8 mths and its still no better.

I despair sometimes, especially when i see other babies sitting contentedly in their high chairs cooing away, while mine struggles and whinges and generally kicks off.

Sorry you have to go through this but you're not alone!!!

 

[x Michelle x]

I really don't mean this to sound harsh but something's just aren't fun for babies lol I know as my son is exactly the same! We are fine if we go to a cafe where he can sit in a highchair and he can get a snack but otherwise if its just being pushed round in a pram he gets so bored! He does however love going in a shopping trolley and round the supermarket, I guess there is a lot to see! Also, we are a slave to his routine, 2hr nap at 9am, 2 hour nap at 1:30pm and a 2 year old has to take a nap 1-2:30... Getting out of the house is difficult somedays but EVERYONE is happier when well rested, especially as they are both teething right now

 

[aliss]

Some babies are too hung strung to be expected to sit still in environments they aren't familiar with. I think the best thing you can do is when you go out to things she can participate in. Such as the park, water play, a play date, etc. Or maybe try getting her sleepy before going out. Play with her a good while, feed her, bathe her, and get her cozy in her carseat. Play soft music on the car ride over to where you're going so she is more relaxed. All you can really do is hope this phase passes quickly.

You know what... I don't think advice could get better than this, really!

0-3 months can be easier to transport them around (some of them) and unfortunately this is a normal evolution of dealing with a more alert baby. It's easier to just do stuff they can handle in time intervals that work for them. When they are older, you can go back to all day excursions but they aren't easy & transportable forever either I'm afraid.