Oh bean I'm so sorry
praying for you.
I agree that birth plans definitely need to be flexible - and a good birth plan will be. Mine were full of contingency plans such as "in the event of a., then I would like to try b. before c." etc. I don't think the plan is necessary, but I do think that its essential to be informed of your options and the easiest way to do that is to make a plan and research each option so you know ahead of time the pros and cons of each and consider circumstances that might make you choose one option over another.
There's never a way to plan the path and outcome of your birth, but by being informed ahead of time you can make informed decisions when the time comes and at the end of the day feel like things happened as thy needed to and you were in control rather than someone else directing the outcome. I don't know that I'm explaining myself well but I like these posts on the subject. https://wholewoman.hubgarden.com/informed-birth-planning/
https://wholewoman.hubgarden.com/why-going-with-the-flow-is-not-a-birth-plan/
PTSD after birth is on the rise and I really feel like "going with the flow" - especially when your idea of birth and your drs idea are opposite - is a huge culprit. If you take two women in lab our and one has decided to completely go with the flow and trust her Dr, and the other has done informed birth planning/birth mapping and makes informed decisions during birth (even if they do end up being what the dr suggested) they can both end up with an outcome they didn't expect, but the "go with the flow" woman is far more likely to end up feeling traumatized by the outcome than the woman who made informed decisions each step of the way based on prior information.
But at the same time, as has been mentioned, it is important to be flexible as well, because taking two women again, both of whom have birth plans where one is "I want a drug free intervention free vaginal birth" and the other is more of a map, if both women end up with an epidural and/or a cesarean the second woman is again far less likely to become traumatized because she knew the risks of the choices she made along the way and was more prepared for things not happening according to plan.
A real life example being me with my first birth and a friend of mine. I wanted a natural, intervention free birth and wanted to avoid induction because I knew it increased my chances of ending up with a cesarean by 30%. When an induction was suggested to me for a variety of reasons I was given time to think it over and I agreed to it, knowing the risks. I then knew I was more likely to feel the need for drugs as well and gave myself permission to ask for them if needed but still keeping in mind my reasons for not wanting them. In the end I didn't ask for them and had a straightforward birth with no further intervention besides the syntocinon, though it did keep me from being as active as I had planned on being which I feel left to a more difficult, prolonged pushing stage. I probably would have declined the induction today under the same circumstances, but even if I had had a different outcome I was prepared for that.
A friend of mine did no preparation for her birth and when an induction was offered agreed to it not knowing of the increased likelihood of cesarean, increased likelihood to need an epidural etc, and she ended up with a heavily medicated labour and emergency cesarean and was highly traumatized by the whole experience and she really feels like it would have been different if she had just known what she was agreeing to.
anyway, its an entirely individual process - no one should say what another woman should or should not do. I do just highly recommend every woman become as informed as she feels comfortable with prior to the birth, and ideally chooses a care provider who has a similar mindset to the birth process and is forthcoming to share their stats to back that up. (In other words if you think you want a natural birth, dont just ask your Dr if they support natural birth, but ask them what natural birth looks like to them and ask for their stats of how often women who want a natural birth actually get one. Your idea of natural birth may be to have full mobility in labour, have no pain relief, push the baby out in whatever position feels comfortable to you without direction etc, whereas your Dr may see natural birth as being hooked up to monitors in bed with a hep lock and catheter "just in case" with coached pushing and even if you end up with forceps in theater with a spinal, if a baby came out your vagina it was a natural birth. Not a great fit.
You are right about not spending the entire time worrying I know it's easier said than done ...will be praying for you and of course always update us when you can xx 
