Aims13h
Momma to 2 beautiful boys
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Perfect!
Christian ladies TTC, we can encourage one another.
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Perfect!
xxx_faithful
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I had been meaning to post this for a few weeks but somehow God kept revealing more to the revelation I had so I continued to wait and hear what he had to say. I hope it speaks to you like it did for me.
Depicting jealously
I was at the Hairdressers the other day getting my hair done, as you do. I noticed for the first time I acted like what she said didn't effect me. It made me curious to think, maybe it didn't. When asking my hairdresser general questions, I was not prepared for my reaction - or my lack of one.
Instead, I did not even have a remote amount of 'wanting to be her' stewing within. It was a plain cold response on my behalf, a response as if I had asked her about the weather. I don't know if it was the fact she had 4 children under the age of 25 with no difficulty. Oh that's right, it was the part where she said, she started having her children when she was 13yo.
No jealously. No sting. Nothing. It was as if, I had been curiously stung by something that didn't bother me. What made this story of fertility unjustified for envy? What made this story fair that she had children effortlessly, while others more prepared, didn't? Could it be despite her luck, I did not want to trade places? Could it be because I looked a little closer into the picture, that I was infact repulsed, at a life someone chose for themself.
Why don't we have the same logical reasoning of rationality with our friends when hearing the news of their pregnancy? Could it be that we compare to those that are like ourselves, and build a bridge of differences to those that aren't? Why do we then do this? Make ourselves feel better when we have it altogether? But when we don't, we not only feel unfavored by God, but go as far as comparing us with others. We are only human but it doesn't excuse our behaviour in times when we choose to compare others to ourselves. We think comparing eases the pain, but answered truthfully, all it does is make the envy linger.
Let us break the temptation to envy someone else's story over our own. Let us think it through enough to realise the only life we want, is the one God has called us to have. Not your neighbour, your best friend or your sisters.
"To wish you were someone else, is to waste the person you are."
xxx_faithful
Depicting jealously
I was at the Hairdressers the other day getting my hair done, as you do. I noticed for the first time I acted like what she said didn't effect me. It made me curious to think, maybe it didn't. When asking my hairdresser general questions, I was not prepared for my reaction - or my lack of one.
Instead, I did not even have a remote amount of 'wanting to be her' stewing within. It was a plain cold response on my behalf, a response as if I had asked her about the weather. I don't know if it was the fact she had 4 children under the age of 25 with no difficulty. Oh that's right, it was the part where she said, she started having her children when she was 13yo.
No jealously. No sting. Nothing. It was as if, I had been curiously stung by something that didn't bother me. What made this story of fertility unjustified for envy? What made this story fair that she had children effortlessly, while others more prepared, didn't? Could it be despite her luck, I did not want to trade places? Could it be because I looked a little closer into the picture, that I was infact repulsed, at a life someone chose for themself.
Why don't we have the same logical reasoning of rationality with our friends when hearing the news of their pregnancy? Could it be that we compare to those that are like ourselves, and build a bridge of differences to those that aren't? Why do we then do this? Make ourselves feel better when we have it altogether? But when we don't, we not only feel unfavored by God, but go as far as comparing us with others. We are only human but it doesn't excuse our behaviour in times when we choose to compare others to ourselves. We think comparing eases the pain, but answered truthfully, all it does is make the envy linger.
Let us break the temptation to envy someone else's story over our own. Let us think it through enough to realise the only life we want, is the one God has called us to have. Not your neighbour, your best friend or your sisters.
"To wish you were someone else, is to waste the person you are."
xxx_faithful
No Doubt
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Faithful, so very true. I've myself feeling that same way lately, considering we're ntnp and my worry of becoming jealous and "trying" ridiculously hard again. But every time I feel that way I also immediately feel a sense of relief. Sometimes as I see other's around me or hear other's stories and am in fact grateful that my story is different. It's very calming and definitely allows me to celebrate others!
I watch NCIS and actress that plays Abby, Pauly Perrette (I'm sure I spelled her last name wrong), she did a commercial about "be yourself". He closing statement was "So be yourself...besides, everyone else is taken". I really had to think about that one day...
I watch NCIS and actress that plays Abby, Pauly Perrette (I'm sure I spelled her last name wrong), she did a commercial about "be yourself". He closing statement was "So be yourself...besides, everyone else is taken". I really had to think about that one day...
Godsjewel
Pregnant w/ triplets!
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You stand on the sidelines of life, watching mothers soothing their crying babies as your own tears cascade down your face. You see fathers rushing their sons off to football practice as you rush back to the local fertility clinic. The parade of if onlys marches past your minds eye as you question every decision youve ever made in your efforts to have a baby.
If only Id started treatment earlier
If only I hadnt taken that pain killer or gotten in that hot tub
If only Id married someone who wasnt infertile
If only I had taken better care of my body
If only Id served God more faithfully
If only I would have called the doctor as soon as I started to bleed
If only
If only
Journey back in time with me and lets slip through the door of an Egyptian throne room. One very powerful man stands with tear-swollen eyes looking at 11 terrified men who are witnessing the most mind-blowing theatrics they could have ever imagined. Joseph reveals his identity to the brothers who threw him into a pit and sold him into slavery when he was just a skinny, gangly 17 year old boy. Now hes second in command of Egypt. What would be their fate?
Josephs brothers stand before him trembling because they know he has the authority to do with them as he wishes. Now is the chance for him to destroy them for all the heartache they caused in his life. What was his response to them?
Now do not be grieved or angry with yourselves, because you sold me here, for God sent me before you to preserve life. (Genesis 45:5)
And just so you dont think that Josephs extension of mercy was just a momentary, emotional response, flip over to Genesis 50:20. Hes speaking to his brothers at the death of their father. They are afraid that Joseph will take revenge on them now that their father is not around to witness it. Joseph once again looks at them and says As for you, you meant evil against me, but God meant it for good in order to bring about this present result, to preserve many people alive. (Genesis 50:20)
What? Why such gracious responses? Come on! Admit it! You wanted to hear him say something like If only you had gotten me out of the pit, Id save you now! But you really blew it this time, buddy! Lets see how you like prison food! How was Joseph able to grant such mercy and grace?
Its really quite simple. Joseph changed the if only s in his life to had it not been s.
Had it not been for his brothers throwing him in a pit and selling him into slavery, he would never have gotten to Egypt,.
Had it not been for Joseph being in Egypt, he would never have been placed in Potiphars home.
Had it not been for the time he spent in Potiphars home, he would never have been wrongly accused of a sexual crime and thrown in prison.
Had it not been for his imprisonment, Joseph would have never met Pharaohs cupbearer and baker, whose dreams he was meant to interpret.
Had it not been for interpreting the dreams of Pharaohs cupbearer and baker, Joseph would never have been able to interpret Pharaohs dreams.
Had it not been for interpreting Pharaohs dreams, Joseph would never have risen to second in command over Egypt.
Had it not been for Joseph rising to power, he would have never been in a position to save the same family members who threw him into a pit years before.
When you reach the resolution of your infertility story, may you watch the parade of if only s become a beautiful display of had it not been s:
Had it not been for infertility, I would never have pursued the adoption of this precious child God ordained for my family before time began.
Had it not been for infertility, I would never have learned how to communicate with my spouse the way we do now.
Had it not been for infertility, I would never have known how to trust God through His silence.
Had it not been for infertility, we would not have experienced the comfort of God in great trials.
Had it not been for infertility, we would never have sought God and His will for our lives the way we have.
Had it not been
Had it not been
Dont let the enemy of your soul convince you that difficult situations mean God isnt working and moving. Hes working through the celebrations. Hes working through your tears. Change the if only s in your life to a marvelous parade of had it not been s.
-BF
If only Id started treatment earlier
If only I hadnt taken that pain killer or gotten in that hot tub
If only Id married someone who wasnt infertile
If only I had taken better care of my body
If only Id served God more faithfully
If only I would have called the doctor as soon as I started to bleed
If only
If only
Journey back in time with me and lets slip through the door of an Egyptian throne room. One very powerful man stands with tear-swollen eyes looking at 11 terrified men who are witnessing the most mind-blowing theatrics they could have ever imagined. Joseph reveals his identity to the brothers who threw him into a pit and sold him into slavery when he was just a skinny, gangly 17 year old boy. Now hes second in command of Egypt. What would be their fate?
Josephs brothers stand before him trembling because they know he has the authority to do with them as he wishes. Now is the chance for him to destroy them for all the heartache they caused in his life. What was his response to them?
Now do not be grieved or angry with yourselves, because you sold me here, for God sent me before you to preserve life. (Genesis 45:5)
And just so you dont think that Josephs extension of mercy was just a momentary, emotional response, flip over to Genesis 50:20. Hes speaking to his brothers at the death of their father. They are afraid that Joseph will take revenge on them now that their father is not around to witness it. Joseph once again looks at them and says As for you, you meant evil against me, but God meant it for good in order to bring about this present result, to preserve many people alive. (Genesis 50:20)
What? Why such gracious responses? Come on! Admit it! You wanted to hear him say something like If only you had gotten me out of the pit, Id save you now! But you really blew it this time, buddy! Lets see how you like prison food! How was Joseph able to grant such mercy and grace?
Its really quite simple. Joseph changed the if only s in his life to had it not been s.
Had it not been for his brothers throwing him in a pit and selling him into slavery, he would never have gotten to Egypt,.
Had it not been for Joseph being in Egypt, he would never have been placed in Potiphars home.
Had it not been for the time he spent in Potiphars home, he would never have been wrongly accused of a sexual crime and thrown in prison.
Had it not been for his imprisonment, Joseph would have never met Pharaohs cupbearer and baker, whose dreams he was meant to interpret.
Had it not been for interpreting the dreams of Pharaohs cupbearer and baker, Joseph would never have been able to interpret Pharaohs dreams.
Had it not been for interpreting Pharaohs dreams, Joseph would never have risen to second in command over Egypt.
Had it not been for Joseph rising to power, he would have never been in a position to save the same family members who threw him into a pit years before.
When you reach the resolution of your infertility story, may you watch the parade of if only s become a beautiful display of had it not been s:
Had it not been for infertility, I would never have pursued the adoption of this precious child God ordained for my family before time began.
Had it not been for infertility, I would never have learned how to communicate with my spouse the way we do now.
Had it not been for infertility, I would never have known how to trust God through His silence.
Had it not been for infertility, we would not have experienced the comfort of God in great trials.
Had it not been for infertility, we would never have sought God and His will for our lives the way we have.
Had it not been
Had it not been
Dont let the enemy of your soul convince you that difficult situations mean God isnt working and moving. Hes working through the celebrations. Hes working through your tears. Change the if only s in your life to a marvelous parade of had it not been s.
-BF
xxx_faithful
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Hi Ladies,
How are we feeling this month? I was reading my daily devotion today and I felt the Holy Spirit speak to me, through this chapter.
Habakkuk 2:2-3 (The Message)
Full of Self, but Soul-Empty
2-3 And then God answered: “Write this.
Write what you see.
Write it out in big block letters
so that it can be read on the run.
This vision-message is a witness
pointing to what’s coming.
It aches for the coming—it can hardly wait!
And it doesn’t lie.
If it seems slow in coming, wait.
It’s on its way. It will come right on time.
God wants us to live by discernment—revelation knowledge, not head knowledge. It's difficult to exercise discernment if you're always trying to figure out everything. But when you're willing to say, "God, I can't figure this out, so I'm going to trust You to give me revelation that will set me free," then you can be comfortable in spite of not knowing.
There is nothing we can do to make him, and there's nothing we can do to stop him. God is God, he is always on time.
xxx_faithful
How are we feeling this month? I was reading my daily devotion today and I felt the Holy Spirit speak to me, through this chapter.
Habakkuk 2:2-3 (The Message)
Full of Self, but Soul-Empty
2-3 And then God answered: “Write this.
Write what you see.
Write it out in big block letters
so that it can be read on the run.
This vision-message is a witness
pointing to what’s coming.
It aches for the coming—it can hardly wait!
And it doesn’t lie.
If it seems slow in coming, wait.
It’s on its way. It will come right on time.
God wants us to live by discernment—revelation knowledge, not head knowledge. It's difficult to exercise discernment if you're always trying to figure out everything. But when you're willing to say, "God, I can't figure this out, so I'm going to trust You to give me revelation that will set me free," then you can be comfortable in spite of not knowing.
There is nothing we can do to make him, and there's nothing we can do to stop him. God is God, he is always on time.
xxx_faithful
Jett55
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Doing pretty good feeling much better think I love 2nd tri lol right now though our home is without water as a pipe broke so gotta get it fixed but the good news is we don't have to worry about paying for the plumber our church has decided to make sure it gets taken care so def. blessed since we don't have the finances to be worrying about it. But then there's the water bill that the water company may or may not work with us on so pray we have some favor with this situation. Being without water is difficult but we're fortunate my family lives across the street for us so we can get showers & stuff 
cupcakestoy
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No news here really...Hcg was down to 408 on Thursday. Anxious to see it below 5! Did start spotting today, not sure what that is about, but fxd that AF will soon follow. Dh & I did have a wonderful weekend in the mountains. Lots of peace & time to feel God's presence. Refreshed, rejuvenated & renewed with Hope for our future
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Nothing really much going on here either.
My father is going in for a hip replacement surgery within the next week, so I'm a little worried about that. His doctor and he were trying hard to delay the surgery as long as they could, but his hip basically collapsed at work and it threw him into medical leave a lot sooner than either of my parents were expecting. Praying for a very successful surgery and a smooth rehab afterwards.
My father is going in for a hip replacement surgery within the next week, so I'm a little worried about that. His doctor and he were trying hard to delay the surgery as long as they could, but his hip basically collapsed at work and it threw him into medical leave a lot sooner than either of my parents were expecting. Praying for a very successful surgery and a smooth rehab afterwards.
No Doubt
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Jett, most say 2nd tri is the best cause you're not so sick, but also not so uncomfortable or without energy yet! Can't say I agree asi was without energy the whole way through, lol. So glad you have assistance with the pipe. We had to replace only 5ft and it was $3500...for 5ft! We got a discount cause we had a newborn and the guy nice, bit still... So definitely a blessing! Praying the water bill comes through as well.
Cupcake, glad you and hubbs had the time go relax and rejuvenate and seek/hear God. That's always refreshing and just what a person needs. Hopefully your body is trying to get back to normal.
Faithful, thank you. Patience and perfect timing has really been in the forefront of my kind lately...a reminder and way to peace for me.
AFM I'm doing pretty good. In our ntnp journey I've had some thoughts pop into my mind that are unwelcome...rush, rush, rush, but I ray that God give me patience and whatever He has for me in His perfect timing and I always feel better. So just basically hanging out and enjoying my life right now. Me and hubbs are doing really well. Virtue is growing and thriving. So all in all, I'm happy and pleased and feel good with how everything is!
Cupcake, glad you and hubbs had the time go relax and rejuvenate and seek/hear God. That's always refreshing and just what a person needs. Hopefully your body is trying to get back to normal.
Faithful, thank you. Patience and perfect timing has really been in the forefront of my kind lately...a reminder and way to peace for me.
AFM I'm doing pretty good. In our ntnp journey I've had some thoughts pop into my mind that are unwelcome...rush, rush, rush, but I ray that God give me patience and whatever He has for me in His perfect timing and I always feel better. So just basically hanging out and enjoying my life right now. Me and hubbs are doing really well. Virtue is growing and thriving. So all in all, I'm happy and pleased and feel good with how everything is!
xxx_faithful
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Some amputees continue to experience the presence of the removed part(such as a limb) for weeks, sometimes years. They can experience pain in missing fingers and toes; and some people who experience "phantom limb," as this phenomenon is referred to, even believe they can hold and feel objects in a missing hand.
I stumbled upon this fascinating statement in a psychology book I have been reading.
If our mind is able to experience something that no longer exists apart of our body, and if our mind is able to feel pain in areas that are infact - no longer there. Then I can't help but think... What does our brain do with our emotions? What does our brain do with the areas of our life that have infact - been healed, but are purely existing because we fiercely believe it so. That we not only go as far as convincing ourselves it's still there, but as far as experiencing its pain.
I will never cease to understand the power and significance of our minds and our bodies to self heal. God created us with the ability and internal structures to fight, to adapt and to rejuvenate. Our minds and bodies just need our instruction to do so.
xxx_faithful
I stumbled upon this fascinating statement in a psychology book I have been reading.
If our mind is able to experience something that no longer exists apart of our body, and if our mind is able to feel pain in areas that are infact - no longer there. Then I can't help but think... What does our brain do with our emotions? What does our brain do with the areas of our life that have infact - been healed, but are purely existing because we fiercely believe it so. That we not only go as far as convincing ourselves it's still there, but as far as experiencing its pain.
I will never cease to understand the power and significance of our minds and our bodies to self heal. God created us with the ability and internal structures to fight, to adapt and to rejuvenate. Our minds and bodies just need our instruction to do so.
xxx_faithful
Kuawen
Pregnant?!
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Not doing so well today... tomorrow is my would-have-been due date. We're just continuing to try and save up money for the possibility of needing to go have tests done. We recently found out that our health insurance doesn't cover anything related to the diagnosis or treatment of infertility, so anything we need to have done will be out of pocket... We've decided to keep trying naturally until Mother's Day, and then go to a fertility clinic from there.
I feel very... I can't even find the words to properly express it. But this morning my daily scripture phone app brought up Isaiah 55:10-11
10 "For as the rain and the snow come down from heaven and do not return there but water the earth, making it bring forth and sprout, giving seed to the sower and bread to the eater,
11 so shall my word be that goes out from my mouth; it shall not return to me empty, but it shall accomplish that which I purpose, and shall succeed in the thing for which I sent it."
I felt it was very appropriate for today, what with all the rain and storms we are having/expecting to have here in California(funny enough there's not a cloud in the sky right now where I am, but we have a 100% chance of rain tomorrow).
But even more than that, I felt comforted by the verse. Tomorrow is my would-be due date, and it seems so appropriate that it would rain on that day. Why shouldn't the angels be crying alongside me? But God sent that little angel to me for only 4 short weeks, and though I cannot see it now, I have to keep faith that my LO was able to fulfill the purpose God sent them to do.
I feel very... I can't even find the words to properly express it. But this morning my daily scripture phone app brought up Isaiah 55:10-11
10 "For as the rain and the snow come down from heaven and do not return there but water the earth, making it bring forth and sprout, giving seed to the sower and bread to the eater,
11 so shall my word be that goes out from my mouth; it shall not return to me empty, but it shall accomplish that which I purpose, and shall succeed in the thing for which I sent it."
I felt it was very appropriate for today, what with all the rain and storms we are having/expecting to have here in California(funny enough there's not a cloud in the sky right now where I am, but we have a 100% chance of rain tomorrow).
But even more than that, I felt comforted by the verse. Tomorrow is my would-be due date, and it seems so appropriate that it would rain on that day. Why shouldn't the angels be crying alongside me? But God sent that little angel to me for only 4 short weeks, and though I cannot see it now, I have to keep faith that my LO was able to fulfill the purpose God sent them to do.
No Doubt
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Wow kuawen. I know tomorrow will be hard, but that was really beautiful. There are so many ways you could think of that...the angels crying, or maybe even a sign that God has not forgotten the promise He gave you, and in your waiting neither should you. A gentle reminder that what he says does and will come to fruition.
cupcakestoy
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Kuawen-Sorry. I'm sure it will be hard on us when our due date arrives 
Of course we are praying & hoping to be blessed again by then. Your time will come!
Afm-Been lying low & waiting on my HCG levels to reach 0 :/ Should get results from yesterday's draw this evening. Still getting + HPT, but lines are much lighter now, so hoping for low numbers today! I had just about decided after my Saline flush on my tubes this coming cycle, that we would just try Femara with TI, but dh seems to think that IUI is the way to go...I guess I'm just affraid it won't work again & don't want to face it...Trying to give it to God, but the flesh keeps taking it back. Not sure why it's so hard to just stop worrying & just trust Him with all this TTC business...*sigh...Hope all you Mom's & TTC'ers are doing well & Have a Blessed Friday, as well as the weekend!!!
Of course we are praying & hoping to be blessed again by then. Your time will come!Afm-Been lying low & waiting on my HCG levels to reach 0 :/ Should get results from yesterday's draw this evening. Still getting + HPT, but lines are much lighter now, so hoping for low numbers today! I had just about decided after my Saline flush on my tubes this coming cycle, that we would just try Femara with TI, but dh seems to think that IUI is the way to go...I guess I'm just affraid it won't work again & don't want to face it...Trying to give it to God, but the flesh keeps taking it back. Not sure why it's so hard to just stop worrying & just trust Him with all this TTC business...*sigh...Hope all you Mom's & TTC'ers are doing well & Have a Blessed Friday, as well as the weekend!!!
xxx_faithful
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Hi Ladies,
I am currently on cycle #3(month 6) for baby no.2. I have not progressed onto cycle #4 as i am still awaiting AF. I would usually get my period the day after taking provera, however, it will be 70 days since my last AF, it somehow doesn't seem to be working effectively this month. I will be going to my first Dr's appointment since moving to America a few months ago, to pick up a script for the provera medication. I will ask if there's anything else i can take to bring fourth AF. I am praying that God will give the Dr knowledge on what she could recommend or encourage that i do, that will give me some clarity.
xxx_faithful
I am currently on cycle #3(month 6) for baby no.2. I have not progressed onto cycle #4 as i am still awaiting AF. I would usually get my period the day after taking provera, however, it will be 70 days since my last AF, it somehow doesn't seem to be working effectively this month. I will be going to my first Dr's appointment since moving to America a few months ago, to pick up a script for the provera medication. I will ask if there's anything else i can take to bring fourth AF. I am praying that God will give the Dr knowledge on what she could recommend or encourage that i do, that will give me some clarity.
xxx_faithful
xxx_faithful
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It's hard not to feel alienated when we keep what we go through to ourselves, but the more I open up about my waiting, the more I find people experiencing their waiting, also.
Infertility really can happen to any woman, at any age. Women ought to know they they are NOT invincible, and they CANNOT separate the fertile to the infertile. They have no place on earth to act superior or in nicer terms, fortunate not to experience it.
While others are feeling lucky that they haven't gone through infertility, I am feeling lucky that I have. I am lucky because not everyone is able to have a story, and a good story might I add - of how God came through for them.
I pray you will feel comforted by the people you are surrounded with, that you learn everything you are meant to learn and that God will continue to flood testimony and realness into your life, in your waiting.
We are all prone to life's arrows, it's how you deal with your wounds.
xxx_faithful
Infertility really can happen to any woman, at any age. Women ought to know they they are NOT invincible, and they CANNOT separate the fertile to the infertile. They have no place on earth to act superior or in nicer terms, fortunate not to experience it.
While others are feeling lucky that they haven't gone through infertility, I am feeling lucky that I have. I am lucky because not everyone is able to have a story, and a good story might I add - of how God came through for them.
I pray you will feel comforted by the people you are surrounded with, that you learn everything you are meant to learn and that God will continue to flood testimony and realness into your life, in your waiting.
We are all prone to life's arrows, it's how you deal with your wounds.
xxx_faithful
Aims13h
Momma to 2 beautiful boys
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No Doubt
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Cupcake, giving it to God is always the easy part in opinion...leaving it there is what's hard. I think we've given something to God that we take back, so what I'd encourage you to do is keep giving it to Him. Everyday, every hour, every minute if you have to. Things are going to happen and words are gonna be said that will bring us back to that place, but we have to remind ourselves and each other that there is a reason we gave it to God in the first place. He's much better at dealing with it than we are and knows much more about our situation than we do. Praying for you hun.
Faithful...sorry the provera isn't working. Praying for wisdom for the doctors to be able to provide answers and effective outcome.
Faithful...sorry the provera isn't working. Praying for wisdom for the doctors to be able to provide answers and effective outcome.
phaedypants
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Kuawen... That is such a hard emotion to navigate. It is hard to make sense of all the pain and uncertainty, but be assured by the scripture you read.
My period is a day late, and I just took a negative test. It was nice to even feel the possibility again, because usually my period is clockwork. It was nice to feel that tiny hope. It was hard to see the single line on the test. Each month isn't quite as heart-wrenching as it used to be. I do see a bigger picture now. But it's still hard. I said sad things to myself for about a minute, and then melted into prayer.
I feel assured, despite everything. Isn't that strange?
My period is a day late, and I just took a negative test. It was nice to even feel the possibility again, because usually my period is clockwork. It was nice to feel that tiny hope. It was hard to see the single line on the test. Each month isn't quite as heart-wrenching as it used to be. I do see a bigger picture now. But it's still hard. I said sad things to myself for about a minute, and then melted into prayer.
I feel assured, despite everything. Isn't that strange?
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