Co sleeping disaster :(

Discussion in 'Pregnancy - Second Trimester' started by Jaylynne, Nov 14, 2011.

  1. Jaylynne

    Jaylynne Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Aug 2, 2011
    Messages:
    3,700
    Likes Received:
    0
    My SIL is a pediatric nurse and runs a facility for physically handicapped babies through school age children. Not too long ago, they had a baby brought in who had been accidentally smothered by her mom due to cosleeping. The baby is now brain dead and is completely dependent on all the feeding and breathing machines. It's so sad! There is no hope for recovery and the mom won't allow the tubes to be taken away.

    This isn't a cosleeping bashing thread, just want anyone considering cosleeping to realize it isn't for everyone (I move way too much!) and if they do cosleep, to get a proper mini bed that goes in their bed and has guard rails or put the bassinet next to them. It's too easy for accidents to happen if you don't have proper safety measures.
     
  2. EarthMama

    EarthMama Mom of 2 & pregnant!

    Joined:
    Oct 4, 2011
    Messages:
    2,883
    Likes Received:
    1
    Wow, that poor mama. :-( I'm sure she thought she was just trying to do the best thing for her baby. How very tragic.
     
  3. Jaylynne

    Jaylynne Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Aug 2, 2011
    Messages:
    3,700
    Likes Received:
    0
    I couldn't imagine how awful that is for the mom! I'm doing the bassinet by my bed since it'll be easier to settle Liam and breastfeed, but with DHs sleep apnea and my constant tossing and turning there's no way I'd ever put a baby in bed with me! I know some moms really like this but I just want moms to be informed that they need to have precautions to keep their LO safe!
     
  4. Tonka106

    Tonka106 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Apr 26, 2011
    Messages:
    521
    Likes Received:
    25
    My mom worked in the hospital when I was little and had a baby come into the ER in the same situation, but baby sadly didn't make it! :( Co-sleeping is great for light sleepers, not for my OH though he's such a heavy sleeper.. I'm keeping the bassinet next to my bed!
     
  5. EarthMama

    EarthMama Mom of 2 & pregnant!

    Joined:
    Oct 4, 2011
    Messages:
    2,883
    Likes Received:
    1
    I'm a very light sleeper myself...often to my detriment (insomnia). And am intending to co-sleep...these stories just make me understand how careful you have to be while doing so.
     
  6. happygal

    happygal mum of 3

    Joined:
    Sep 23, 2009
    Messages:
    7,794
    Likes Received:
    0
    that's terrible. but co sleeping can be brilliant too. olivia slept in between me and oh right from being tiny and still sleeps there 18months later. me and oh are both light sleepers though and neither of us smoke x
     
  7. AirForceWife7

    AirForceWife7 Mama to Brenna.

    Joined:
    Oct 5, 2010
    Messages:
    2,322
    Likes Received:
    0
    Poor, poor mom & LO :nope: It's so sad too that she was only doing what she thought was best for her child.
     
  8. butterflydebs

    butterflydebs Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Sep 20, 2010
    Messages:
    263
    Likes Received:
    0
    This is truly tragic, someone I know accidently smothered there baby while co sleeping the baby didn't make it and the poor mum felt so guilty even though she meant no harm.
    To lose a baby must be the worse pain in the world but to feel in some way responsible must be unbearable. So personally there is no way I will ever be asleep with my baby in my bed.
     
  9. Rach27

    Rach27 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Aug 5, 2009
    Messages:
    906
    Likes Received:
    0
    That is very sad though I hasten to say, probably quite rare. If you do it safely then co-sleeping can be one of the most amazing experiences of your life. We are in the process of transferring our 20 month old into his own bed at the moment. (He seems willing!! ;) ) I would hate for people to be put off.
     
  10. pixeldust

    pixeldust Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Aug 8, 2011
    Messages:
    811
    Likes Received:
    0
    Unfortunately all too common, but generally only when the parent has been either drinking or taking drugs. I found when I co-slept with my son I was aware of him at all times, even when I was asleep I was still conscious of him.

    I wouldn't warn people off co-sleeping without knowing all of the facts (e.g. how old was the baby, did the parents smoke, had they taken drugs, had they had anything to drink at all).
     
  11. kat2504

    kat2504 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Aug 8, 2011
    Messages:
    5,290
    Likes Received:
    0
    I intend to get one of those 3 sided bays that attach to the side of your bed. The baby can still see you and you can touch it and feed it easily but it is safely in its own sleeping area away from all your pillows and duvets and stuff. They are quite pricey so I will be looking on ebay for second hand.
     
  12. bubbles19

    bubbles19 Mummy of 1 girl

    Joined:
    Jul 1, 2011
    Messages:
    1,156
    Likes Received:
    0
    aww that poor lady :/ but unfortuantley that is a risk and thats a risk i wont be taking i couldn't deal with that, i sleep lightly but i move and wiggle so much plus i like my sleep and my room it would drive me mad having to look out for the baby aswell as getting up to feed her and change her, plus my OH smokes and works really hard so he sleeps real heavily. such a horrible thing to go through im sure its amazing for some mums but cosleeping is deffinatley not for me and my family x
     
  13. pixydust

    pixydust Married mama of two :D

    Joined:
    Sep 19, 2009
    Messages:
    2,399
    Likes Received:
    0
    we co-slept with my son on and off from 4 months and full time from 7 months and are just stopping now, i've never felt even a little bit worried doing it, i'm totally aware of every movement he makes and we all got more sleep that way x
     
  14. harrybaby

    harrybaby Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jul 12, 2011
    Messages:
    460
    Likes Received:
    0
    Ive never wanted to co-sleep, for my own personal reasons, but I do remember the long knackered nights of breastfeeding - have you guys ever fallen asleep during feeding? The first time it happened, I woke up and my DD was still in my arms fast alseep with my boob hanging out - it scared the crap out of me - but I was so tired - I really had no idea what was going on.

    I know this isnt actively co-sleeping but its easily done, especially if your feeding whilst lay down. It scares me too much, especially when I hear sad stories like this one :(
     
  15. Siuan

    Siuan Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jun 3, 2011
    Messages:
    3,217
    Likes Received:
    1
    There are always sad/bad stories to read along with all the good stories where a particular technique/decision has been beneficial.

    Whilst I do feel very bad for these parents, I still intend on co-sleeping with my baby when she is born. She will be either in one of those three sided bays, or she will be in her cot with the side down next to our bed. The benefits of this in my opinion outweigh the negatives. I still have more reading up to do on this so my decision is not 100% just yet, but it is most likely.
     
  16. roxursox302

    roxursox302 baby girl <3

    Joined:
    Mar 22, 2010
    Messages:
    526
    Likes Received:
    0
    The OP is not warning people away from co sleeping. All she is saying is to be careful when your doing it and take the proper precautions!
     
  17. xCeex

    xCeex Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Dec 15, 2010
    Messages:
    940
    Likes Received:
    0
    whats the point in co sleeping?

    Sorry, but why are they in your bed?
     
  18. Tacey

    Tacey Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    May 29, 2008
    Messages:
    6,274
    Likes Received:
    0
    I kind of wonder why they wouldn't be! I'm joking, but I was dead set against it, but when Alice came along it felt like the most natural thing in the world to have her by me. In fact, I would feel far less safe having my baby in a cot.

    My main reasons were that I could keep a close check on her breathing and temperature, ease of breastfeeding, her breathing is regulated by mine, better sleep for both of us, no crying at bedtime, and the bonding time it gave us. I can understand it isn't for everyone though. Just another parenting decision we have to make!
     
  19. EarthMama

    EarthMama Mom of 2 & pregnant!

    Joined:
    Oct 4, 2011
    Messages:
    2,883
    Likes Received:
    1
    What Tacey said. For me it's the most natural way to go.
     
  20. nikkchikk

    nikkchikk Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jun 14, 2011
    Messages:
    991
    Likes Received:
    0
    You know, they do have co-sleeper beds. It's like a mini bassinet you place between mom and dad. I think you need a King bed to truly be comfortable, but at least this would minimize the risk of smothering!
     

Share This Page

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
    Dismiss Notice