Conception envy...

[xMissxZoiex]

So sorry this cycle was unsuccessful hunny xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

 

[Hope3]

My beta was BFN...feeling devastated.

So sorry. Sending hugs.

 

[ginny83]

So sorry for the BFN Mommyagain

I get conception envy and I hate it! We've been trying for just over 12 months for #2 and during that time I've had 3 miscarriages.

I get jealous when people announce their pregnant. I'm the only person that I've ever known to announce their pregnancy and then loose the baby (the miscarriage at 16 weeks, I announced it at 15 weeks). I know I'm not the only one that's gone through that, but it always stings when I see someone announcing their pregnancy at like 6 or 7 weeks.

 

[Mommyagain]

Thank you ladies for your thoughts. And I am so sorry Ginny for your loss. That is a horrible thing to go through.

I am feeling in a dark spot right now. We are truly coming to the end of our journey and I am having trouble wrapping my head around it. We have two frosty babies left and we will try one last time but then that it is for us. We can not afford to do another fresh cycle because our insurance covers nothing and it is all out of pocket. I thought for sure that IVF would bring us our long awaited baby...then I thought FET would surely help. I felt soooo good about this last FET cycle. I just felt I was pregnant. But nope. I will be better in time but right now I am feeling both sad and even angry. Everything seemed perfect with my body, the embies were good, and my heart, home, and family are open to a new member but its just not happening. Yet these people out there who abuse and even kill their kids just cant seem to stop reproducing. I just read an article about a women who has apparently had (that they know of) three babies and killed all three infants...REALLY!?!? Hard to believe...

Sorry ladies. I am no fun right now.

 

[YearningHeart]

Awwwwww mommyagain... dont be sad! I know it really sucks when you wait for so long and have hopes up with excitment only to find out it didnt go well.

I can no imagine how you must be feeling, but I want you to think as positive as possible. Dont look/compare at those who have babies, think of many ladies across the world who are in worse situations. My student who is in early 20s was told she can not have any children because she has a certain health problem. She was absolutely devastated and still is trying to cope with it.

I am not a mother and have for soo many years but I just keep hoping one day I will be my lucky day, many times I have got negative reports from the GYN but I keep having hope, it is indeed very hard but we all just have to be as strong as possible.

I would give you a big hug if u were next to me! Let the tears flow but dont stop the heart from hope! x

 

[YearningHeart]

.

 

[tamithomas]

I'm so sorry Mommyagain, I hope the last shot is the winner who knows..miracles do happen after some people do officially hang up their ttc coat. GL!

 

[sowant2beamum]

We've been TTC for a little over 5yrs and have just experienced our 1st miscarriage in January, it still hurts soo much... I have PCOS and I'm hoping to have my gastric sleeve surgery in July (as my a big lady due to massive weight gain from the PCOS), so for now We've decided to go back on the pill till a year after the surgery, then i'll be in better shape for pregnancy so We've hoping sooo bad that will work..
I know we have decided to wait, but it's still very raw and seeing pregnant women everywhere is driving me crazy and sometimes angers me when it's women who is far from able to provide for a baby, and are only having a baby for money....

 

[Mommyagain]

I am so sorry about your miscarriage. After longing and waiting for your baby for so long only to have it taken away...just seems almost cruel.

 

[Kimiw]

I don't think that jealousy goes away to be honest. My friend just gave birth and that was very hard for me. But I'm trying to be supportive, we have been trying for going on 7 years and we had our very first bfp in August, just to miscarry. Since than I have become more bitter because it took us 6 years to achieve something that was snatched away from us 2 weeks after (I was 6 weeks). My mom called me this morning to tell me my cousin just found out she was pregnant. That nearly killed me. I would NEVER wish a misscarriage on anybody, ever, but sometimes I wish more people could truly understand how I feel. To top it off we started looking at adoption, yeah right, 45,000 dollars just to get started! So next time somebody says, "you could always adopt" you can put that number into perspective! Sorry, I'm just full of emotions I needed to vent.

 

[Kimiw]

We've been TTC for a little over 5yrs and have just experienced our 1st miscarriage in January, it still hurts soo much... I have PCOS and I'm hoping to have my gastric sleeve surgery in July (as my a big lady due to massive weight gain from the PCOS), so for now We've decided to go back on the pill till a year after the surgery, then i'll be in better shape for pregnancy so We've hoping sooo bad that will work..
I know we have decided to wait, but it's still very raw and seeing pregnant women everywhere is driving me crazy and sometimes angers me when it's women who is far from able to provide for a baby, and are only having a baby for money....

Oh I'm right there with you. Sorry for your loss Hun. I too have pcos and I also deal with the weight problem that comes with it. We been at it for nearly 7 years. I too had a miscarriage, in August 2012 first bfp and it was snatched away 2 weeks later. I know how you must be feeling!

 

[Mommyagain]

Vent away Kimiw.

 

[LoveCakes]

This has changed over time for me. When we first started hearing other people getting pg was exciting, I was thinking we could be pg together, our kids could play together etc...

Then as time went on I was happy for them, thinking one more baby in the world doesn't mean one less is available

When we passed the year mark and got put on hold I look at other women with their families and think, that's where we should be. I do my best to stay away from other pg women which isn't ideal but it's the easiest thing to do.

Unfortunately the rational part of my brain can't overcome the emotional part because I know technically that other people's success has no effect on my chance of it.

 

[YearningHeart]

Kimiw and sowant2beamum - Im so sorry to hear of your loss. I can not imagine how hard it must be. I hope all this wait and pain will all be worth it in the end!!! xx

 

[YearningHeart]

LoveCakes - I so know what you mean. Thats how I feel, I seclude myself away from those that are pregnant. Only few days ago I found out one of my good friend is expecting. Yesterday I find out my colleague is pregnant too! And theres more!!

I find it more relaxing to be away from them otherwise it just reminds me of what I dont have and what I yearn for so much.