Confession.. it's a boy and I feel guilty :(

[vitriolic_vix]

I'm so happy that my baby is healthy as I've been so worried this pregnancy. My last one was awful and it's taken me a long time to think about getting pregnant again. To put my mind at rest I had a 16 week scan and we were told that we're having a boy. My husband is over the moon and my little girl is putting on a brave face as she really wanted a sister.

I'm so ashamed to say that I feel a bit meh about it. I never imagined myself having a boy. I'm not very good at being patient and worry about how I'll be with a rowdy boy who plays trucks and dinosaurs. We have a small house and the kids are going to have to share until we can afford to move which will be at least 4 years I'm worried how my girl will find it sharing. I'm being irrational and have no idea why I'm not more excited what's wrong with me???

 

[LoraLoo]

It's just not what you expected that's all. New things can get a while to get used- not that your little one is a 'thing!'

Fwiw, my kids get on better with their opposite sexed siblings than the same sexed, I wouldn't worry about sharing either- she will love having him in with her ☺️

 

[6lilpigs]

Its very normal to have more of a desire for a certain gender for a million reasons! Little boys are the most loving little people ever, you will all fall head over heels with him when he arrives, I am completely envious! Congratulations xx

 

[Farmgirlalee]

I sympathize. I have a feeling I am having a boy and would much rather have another girl. I know whatever I have I will love and it will be great- but it is hard right now. *hugs* Don't feel bad or beat yourself up over how you feel.

 

[Periwinkle58]

It happens! especially when you've built up an idea in your head. Both me and oh wanted a boy. and all the signs pointed to boy (symptoms and old wives tales), but i'm having a baby girl. I had the harmony test done early on and called in to get the results (and also find out the gender). I put the phone on speaker and she said "you're having a healthy.....babyyyyy...... girl!". Oh was in shock and didn't say anything and i busted out crying because i was upset it wasn't a boy. looking back it's so dumb and after a couple weeks i got used to the idea of having a girl and cannot wait. Just give it a lil time and you'll be extra happy that it's a boy and not a girl, you'll see Plus you have the perfect combo, one of each! can't beat that!

 

[stellababy]

hun i was the same way as you when i found out my son will be a boy. i have a sister and all girl cousins, so i always imagined a family with two daughters. however, as 6lilpigs said, boys are soo lovable and amazing! my son is so affectionate with me, much more than my daughter. he is cuddly and loving and i am so happy to have him now. he does love trucks and dinosaurs, but i play with him and its fine! also you have a daughter for "girly things" you can do together.
now i found out #3 will be a boy, it made the relationship with my girl even better as we will be the only girls in the family.

 

[superfrizbee]

Nothing is wrong with you. I think it's hard to imagine another gender than the one that you have experience with. I wanted my first to be a boy. Nope! She was a girl! For my secondly I then wanted another girl and got a boy! Go figure. It took me a while to get my head around things but of course now I wouldn't have it any other way! My sister and her brother have an amazing bond and adore each other (most of the time!). It's really wonderful to see. Your daughter will love her little brother no matter what once she sees him, and before! Sharing a room can be managed. My sil used to have her girl and boy kids share a room before they moved to a bigger place. She made some kind of partition with a storage unit but I've seen it done with a curtain which would be nice as you could still open up the room and give them their own space and privacy. Have a Google of some room ideas, start looking at boy clothes and you'll find yourself getting more excited as time goes on. Know that one day you will look back and be so thrilled that you have your little boy in your life.

 

[superfrizbee]

Oh I meant to say my little boy is super loving and affectionate too. He is a little scamp with a wicked and cheeky sense of humour. Can't comment much on trucks and dinosaurs yet. At the mo he just wants his sister's hair clips and elsa dress!

 

[vitriolic_vix]

Thanks everyone! I feel a little better and not quite so wicked for feeling this way. Once I've had my 20 week and we start buying things I'm sure I'll get used to it. All those beautiful clothes I saved from my first will be going on eBay and I get to start again!

 

[ARuppe716]

Don't feel bad. I find out in 3 weeks and I'm nervous. I'll be happy with either but would love a girl to experience both. Plus, everyone around me thinks it's a girl. I'm afraid I will be disappointed if it's a boy and I dont want to feel upset over such a wonderful thing. But my little boy is the sweetest, most fun little person I could imagine. We have a small loving space and he does fine. We try to get out to parks, etc when we can but he is really well behaved in our small home. Although the idea of two little boys running around in here is a little scary!! Haha

 

[xdxxtx]

All of my kids love pink, dinosaurs, tutus and trucks. And I can't get my kids to stop sharing a room! I have a 6 bedroom house. ALL four of my kids stay in the same room, and they usually even stay in the same bed. I can't separate them! They're all best friends and just want to be together all the time. It's crazy!

I understand gender disappointment - and there's a whooooole board DEDICATED to gender disappointment because it is so common... But don't feel guilty, and certainly don't feel that you have to bombard your kids with stereotypes because that's not good for any kid. I'm glad you're going to feel better about starting over and giving this a chance - because your son will be just as wonderful to you as your daughter, and my little boys are actually much gentler and more loving than my daughter... so if you love a good snuggle, you're in luck!

 

[DobbyForever]

I'm going to level with you...
As a teacher, the boys in my class have year to year had more behaviors issues than girls. But as a sister with three brothers, I will tell you that it boils down to how you raise your kids. My brothers are well mannered, polite, not rowdy at all. They were driven, intelligent, and grew up to be a med student and undergrads at top tier universities. So try not to worry about personality, just set your boundaries early.

As for DD, I shared a room with my older brother when I was 2 and he was 5. I was obviously little, but we got along. We entertained each other and got into mischief together. So things seemed to work out. But my dad died when I was four and my mom had issues sleeping alone so the three of us shared a room until I was 7. Then she remarried and we moved into my stepdad's and each got our own rooms lol. So it'll work out.

And never feel guilty or bad for feeling the way you feel. You are entitled to think/feel what you want

 

[Cariad_x]

It's unexpected so naturally a bit of a shock. Once you get your head around it you'll be fine

My first is a boy and he is the most affectionate wee thing ever and SUCH a mummy's boy. He's hilarious too and so so clever. Having a wee boy is so amazing and as such I was happy to think this baby would be a boy (turns out I'm having a girl which I'm also happy about).

 

[DobbyForever]

Oh yeah I second cariad boys love their moms

 

[May55]

I dont know the gender yet.. almost 7 weeks so a couple more to go before we find out but I have such a strong feeling its a boy... i just know it... I will be happy no matter what of course and im tired of people saying "as long as the baby is healthy" i feel like saying No shit i know that is all that matters! We have a son already and I want a girl so bad and i already have the same feeling you describe...just a meh feeling like, i want this baby so bad but yea id really like to have a little girl :/ its a strange guilty feeling for sure

 

[Kanichen34]

With my first my husband and I both wanted a boy, and we had a girl. We were both disappointed for a few days but now, she's amazing and I wouldn't change her. Now we're expecting no2 and it is a little boy. Hubby is over the moon, I still can't get my head round it 10 weeks later!! But, I know from last time I won't care once he's here. After all, it's a bit crazy to decide how you feel about a person based on the shape of their gentials isn't it 😂 Don't feel guilty, when your baby is in your arms you really won't care xx

 

[JAJuly2013]

Its very common to experience gender disappointment. I have a son and a daughter and I'm currently pregnant with my 2nd daughter. I'm super excited and I was secretly hoping for another girl. My husband was hoping for a boy and I know initially he was a little bummed but it didn't last long. He already has a son so it's not a huge deal.

Boys are very fun My first was a boy and he loved dinosaurs, dragons and playing rough. But there is something special about a mother - son relationship. Give yourself time, you will start to accept it and enjoy it once he is here. Don't beat yourself up. Everything will be ok!

 

[mara16jade]

If it helps at all. Boys are sooo fun! Boys love their moms soooo much. Their toys are fun and pretend play is very creative. Clothing isn't as cute, but as they get older, they get "cool". I wanted a girl so badly at first. Then I had my son. And now I'm pregnant again and am over the moon happy that the drs are guessing another boy. I'm shocked I'm so happy about it. I always envisioned myself with girls, and here I am most likely having 2 boys. Lol

I know it'll be a mental transition, but you'll soon find that boys are so much fun.

 

[Jessy1987]

I know that feeling, but you should be grateful

 

[PrettyInInk42]

I know how you feel. I just found out today that I'm having a boy. I was ok for part of the day, but then spent 2 hours in bed, crying. I know it's hard, but we'll get through it. And all those feelings will go away once our LOs are here.