Dear Birth Fairy... (what would be your DREAM birth?)

[Notabene]

Just asking as it took me a long time to 'get over' my first birth, where I was in labour for 26 hours, couldn't sit or lie down right from the first (extremely painful) contraction. I wasn't able to eat or drink either and my epidural failed. I had an episiotomy + ventouse delivery, and only very narrowly escaped an caesarian (which at the time I kind of wanted, but I am so happy I didn't have!) Hahaha...

It, of course, was ALL worth it though, and I know there are much worse birth stories out there!!

So this time, my dream birth would be:

* Go into spontaneous labour (water breaking naturally, as opposed to first birth, follwed by contractions)

* be more in control -using hypnobirthing techniques (and get bf to go to the course with me)

* don't go to hospital too soon -prenatal ward sucked and I felt so uncomfortable there

*water birth with gas & air

* I would love to be able to remember more of it (i.e. I don't remember what the first thing I said to my son was, as I was shattered)

*and it would be lovely to have the same midwife as last time, she was great, and such a good fit with me and my boyfriend.

Also, it would be great if it could be a bit quicker than last time please. Something like 8-10 hours would be amazing!

Thank you Birth Fairy!

Love,
me

 

[Eleanor ace]

I hope you get your dream birth this time! .
My "dream birth" was to labour at home until labour was well established, go to hospital and use the pool and gas and air and pop a baby out.
With my 1st I was induced so I was at the hospital when I went into labour. I couldn't have a water birth as there was meconium in my waters and then I had to be on my back for constant monitoring as they kept losing LO's heartrate in other positions. DS was back to back so lying down didn't feel great. I got gas and air but wasn't allowed it for pushing (it made me too lazy ). I pushed for 2 hours and was pretty tired (I hadn't slept in about 36 hours by this point). I was only in labour for 6 hours though. I had a bad tear which obviously I'd have liked to have avoided.
I did enjoy my 1st experience but was sad not to have been able to use the pool or experience going into labour spontaneously. So with my 2nd my dream birth was again to labour at home until established, go to hospital and use the pool and gas and air and pop a baby out- this time without tearing in two .
I did go into labour spontaneously, I went in earlier than I would have done as I was GBS+ and needed the antibiotics, but I was 8cm when I got there anyway so I got to labour mostly at home. I had a water birth with gas and air and popped DD out with very minimal tearing . The only thing I'd change about her birth was being GBS+ and having to have the IV antibiotics, because I'm a totally baby when it comes to needles in my veins and I didn't enjoy that part! But everything else was lovely .

 

[x__amour]

I would love to go into labor before 41 weeks (my c-section date) and have that, "Oh my gosh! I'm in labor!" moment. I'd love for everything to progress naturally and have no complications and have the VBAC of my dreams.

Trying to stay positive that this is a possibility!

 

[tristansmum]

Well I go some of my wishes the second time!
First was induced, failed forceps and emcs. Also took a long time for me to get over it.
Second iI went into spontaneous labour at home so got the crazy drive to hospital in labour. Had hoped to stay at home longer but contractions came out of nowhere and we immediately lasting a minute and only a couple of minutes apart so as I was vbac and had a half hour drive we went in. I laboured on gas and air and nothing for pushing so got to feel everything (oowww). It was quite quick.... 4 hours from first painful contraction to him born.
I pushed his head out myself but his shoulders got stuck so the very end was emergency. He was placed onto my chest but was shocked so had to be taken off quite quick. So it wasn't perfect (I doubt any birth really is) but it ticked alot of my boxes.

In an ideal world I'd love a waterbirth in a midwife led Unit bit both labours I was high risk and on labour ward.

 

[RaspberryK]

What a great thread!

My first labour was at home and long! In the pool which was lovely.
My midwife diagnosed I wasn't in active labour because I hadn't dilated past 4cm however she didn't check after my waters broke and I started vomiting.
Dh took me to hospital where ds was born within half an hour.
He was big but I didn't tear at all and we were back home in 3 hours.
In some ways it was perfect but in others it really didn't go to plan.
I'd like a shorter labour, 26 hours was exhausting, I had no pain relief and that was great.
I loved the pool so I'm doing that again, hope to actually give birth in it this time.
I'm going to be more assertive with the midwife this time.
Xx

 

[mara16jade]

Honestly? As pain free as possible.

I'd like to have my water break at home, eventually go to the hospital, get the epidural once the pain gets too bad, let baby drop down pretty low before pushing so that I don't have to push too long, no tears/episiotomy, immediate skin-to-skin, have DH cut the cord and soon be left to recover and have cuddles.

 

[Jayneypops]

Painless! Lol!

Failing that
Home water birth
Low lighting
Soft music
Hubby holding me
Hypnobirthing breathing techniques

That would be perfect. Wanted it both times, got nothing like!!

 

[shiseru]

I would love to go into labor before 41 weeks (my c-section date) and have that, "Oh my gosh! I'm in labor!" moment. I'd love for everything to progress naturally and have no complications and have the VBAC of my dreams.

Trying to stay positive that this is a possibility!

Ooooh this is so true, I wish our VBAC a success and have a quick and natural birth with no complication, I would love to go into labor at 38-39 weeks as I am not allowed to go past my due date!

 

[wishuwerehere]

In essence like my first labour (2.5 hours and uncomplicated) but less panicked - at home so we're not worried about giving birth in the car, in water for pain relief.

 

[BunnyN]

My first birth was pretty good despite being 38hrs in total. I wanted to stay at home, stay active and stay in control which I pretty much managed. There are only small things I'd change next time.

 

[Notabene]

I guess a lot of our dream births come down to luck (is the pool free? Will my waters break naturally? etc), but this time around I'll at least prepare more actively and hope this helps me achieve some of my goals.

I'm going to do a hypnobirthing course with my boyfriend and practice the breathing techniques religiously, and will probably look into raspberry leaf teas etc.... But at the end of the day, by birth might not be what I dream about, but I want to stay positive about it, and embrace whatever happens and work with it...

I hope you all get your dream births -maybe putting words to it might help us achieve it to some extend? x

 

[RaspberryK]

I guess a lot of our dream births come down to luck (is the pool free? Will my waters break naturally? etc), but this time around I'll at least prepare more actively and hope this helps me achieve some of my goals.

I'm going to do a hypnobirthing course with my boyfriend and practice the breathing techniques religiously, and will probably look into raspberry leaf teas etc.... But at the end of the day, by birth might not be what I dream about, but I want to stay positive about it, and embrace whatever happens and work with it...

I hope you all get your dream births -maybe putting words to it might help us achieve it to some extend? x

I think you're right!
I'm going to write a letter of wishes and talk to dh about what he should do if I can't make a decision!
I'll be talking to my midwife so she knows what I feel but I'm lucky that the home birth team are pro natural xx

 

[Kess]

I'd do the same as the first time as far as waters going on their own, home water birth with pretty short labour and tens machine as pain relief. I'd like just me and DH this time now I'm more confident, with the MW staying unobtrusive. I'm desperate to avoid the pain that the MW thinks was from my symphisis pubis struggling to accomodate LO's head as that was very unpleasant. Hypnobirthing was great.

Of course, if we're talking waving magic wands and all... those orgasmic births sound cool...

 

[RaspberryK]

 

[Shadowy Lady]

I got my dream labour, I was lucky I had low expectation beforehand but this would have been my list:

- go into labour naturally (don't be induced) - I went into labour at 39w2d
- Have a quick labour - Mine was just about 4 hours from active labour to baby
- Stay at home as long as I can - I realized pretty late that I was actually in labour lol....I was 6 cm when we got to the hospital
- give birth naturally - I did
- don't tear - I didn't tear, not even a graze
- have a healthy baby - most important one

 

[hayz_baby]

My 2nd labour managed to right some of the wrongs from my 1st. Similar sort of story.. Long and stuck on a bed in an uncomfortable birthing position. Ended up with a drip which I kept ripping out and had pethidine which didn't help excel make me feel more tired then I already was. I pushed for over 2 hours and lo was born via vontouse and I narrowly escaped an emcs.
I had planned a homebirth for no2 which didn't happen but i was able to do majority of my labour at home and when I got to the hosp I was able to birth in the pool but they discovered lo was breech as I was pushing so I was put on the bed but I stil manage to both naturally with no tears!
So same mw.. No surprises.. Just a boring old water birth at home tho.
Magic wand..? Painless and natural!

 

[Emma&Freya]

Dear Birth Fairy,

The next time I have a child, I would like to just fart and my baby to appear, no stitches.

Love,

Emma xx

 

[TaylorAnn]

I haven't had any children yet, but my dream birth would be to go into spontaneous labour around my due date. I would like to stay at home until I'm in established labour. I would like to birth at a birthing centre rather than a hospital. At the birth I would like my partner present and probably my aunty as she was present at my birth and my Mum has passed away, so I think it would be nice to have her sister there. I would like to have a natural birth with no drugs, to stay in control of myself and make my wishes known. As little intervention as possible. Unless necessary of course. I would love a water birth, as I know warm water always soothes me when I am in pain. I really want a soothing atmosphere, dimmed lights, soft music. I want my baby to be born into peace without bright lights and loud noises in their face. I would probably look into hypnobirthing to help with the pain. After the birth, I want my partner to cut the cord. I would like my baby placed on my chest straight away, and not taken from me. I would love to breastfeed straight away when my baby is ready for a feed. I would also probably like to limit the amount of visitors for the first day or so. I really want to be able to breastfeed my children and have as much skin-on-skin time as possible when they're just born, and I don't know if I'd like lots of visitors passing my baby around for hours. That probably sounds really selfish haha, but if that little person has just come from my body where they listen to my heartbeat every day, I think it would make the transition easier for them if they are close to me a lot of the time.

 

[mara16jade]

Dear Birth Fairy,

The next time I have a child, I would like to just fart and my baby to appear, no stitches.

Love,

Emma xx

You win! I'm going with this one.

 

[Mummymoo_x]

I was expecting the worse & actually had the best labour so I've already had my dream labour haha! I dont think il get that lucky again.