December IVFers

[treasured]

Mel- great news! When will you have your first scan?

My shell- so many people ive spoken to have had low betas which double normally! Not long tI'll the next appointment but it must be so difficult waiting and not being 100% sure. As for feeling pregnant I don't even feel any different and it worries me sometimes but then people have such a wide variety of feelings and symptoms that we can never know how to feel ahh.

Lucinda- testing sounds like a good idea, how does that all work? Would it mean tranfer would be further away? I cannot believe how hard it must be to go through all this and think about cost after cost I hope you're OK, have you shared with anyone else yet support? Xxxx

 

[treasured]

Also myshel you have every right to be wobbly right now this time must be so hard for you and I think you're doing extremely well considering! Massive hugs x

 

[Lucinda7981]

Treasured....hospital offered an autopsy which I thought that is what I needed and signed for. When dr came he asked for chromosomal testing...thank hod he did cause that is what I needed and there is a special kit involved. Unfortunately they asked bout burial arrangements which I was not prepared for...and almost lost it. Results come back 2/3 wks later.
Then once I have those results I can talk bout PGD which since I have 5 embryos itll be over 3,000 and hopefully they survive thaw ...then freeze, then thaw again.....re says 90% survival rate and then there's hoping I have some normal ones. So here's to coming up with PGD testing money, and then FET cycle money, plus travel :/ unfortunately unless I do this I don't see the point of another transfer as I don't wish this whole seeing a heartbeat and then not seeing a heartbeat and then waiting a week for a d&c ...etc

 

[Lucinda7981]

Myshel how many dpt?

 

[Nolimitxox]

Lucinda, Im sorry I feel bad I didnt mention that part of it to you because youre right, it does make you step back and it puts this experience into perspective. Its aweful. Im still not over it. We had our baby boy baptised at the hospital.

 

[Sophie2015]

Lucinda- my heart breaks for you. It truly does. I've been through the heartbeat, no heartbeat, d&c thing 4 times now. I had my 15 week loss tested and cremated. I will say, having her ashes was the biggest comfort to me. It still is most days.
I wish there were words to make this easier but I know from experience there just isn't. Big hugs.

 

[treasured]

Lucinda, what a never ending amount of things for you to process... I can't imagine how hard it must be to juggle all the emotion of this situation with the practicalities. I see exactly your point though about not wanting to go through with again without the absolute best chance. I can't believe the costs over there. If we had to pay I don't think we could even afford one round of ivf let alone all these extra things. It's so unfair that your insurance doesn't cover it.
Sending lots of love! X

 

[Lucinda7981]

First things first.....you guys are great!!!!! Thanks for listening and all your input.....means the world with my all over mind right now.
Nolimit...no worries that you didnt say anything....now i know and hopefully dont ever have to go down that road :/ If i would have known maybe i would have opted for arrangements but was so not emotionally prepared so i just opted for the testing and hope i get some answers and will forever remember my sweet baby. Just thinking will the results bring me clarity or bring on guilt?....im just a mess girls
Sophie i think that only time will help me heal......i try denial as it it never happened to cope for now. Not good i know but i cant think bout it too much cause i turn into a mess.
Treasured yes the costs are craaaaaazy but i have to consider myself blessed that this is a frozen which is sooooo much cheaper than fresh. I just wish the PGD testing on the embryos was less or that the clinic could reduce those costs.....my old RE would. Will try to see if they can reduce something once i have the results on baby.
If i lived in my old state....would have had a great chance of so much being covered :/

 

[treasured]

How are you all? Missing your chat and sending lots of love your way xxx

 

[Lucinda7981]

Hello Treasured.....im doing okay. Decided that I wont be doing PGD testing on my remaining embryos as I found out it could be extremely damaging process to thaw, freeze, then thaw again. Don't know what the plan would be or when I will transfer again due to timing.

 

[treasured]

Lucinda, what a difficult decision to be faced with but under the circumstances I guess it is better to have more chances with the embryos that you have. I didn't realise omg testing involved such high risk to the embryos! How are you feeling? Have you been able to relax and take time for yourself? I think it's fair for you to take as long as you need to prepare for the next go. I can't think of how difficult it all must be. Lots of love x

 

[Myshelsong]

Sorry ladies, I have been reading along, but was so upset with my early loss I just bailed.
Lucinda, I know this is difficult to deal with. My heart goes out to you.
We only have two embryos left, so we will not be doing any testing on those, just keeping our fingers crossed and will try to do another FET either this cycle or the next in April.

 

[Lucinda7981]

Treasured how are you feeling? AFM thanks for your words...some days are better than others as i've been trying to stay to myself. I look early pregnant still...dont know how to explain but its a constant reminder of what happened. Also my due date was suppose to be around my DH's birth date so not looking forward to that. Tom is my post op with the obgyn and im dreading the long drive and all the questions.....i find it rather annoying that all the providers here in FL find IVF so "weird". Its like i went to a mad scientist who implanted an alien......the questions they ask and their expressions are strange. Anywho i will be talking to RE on the 21st to discuss whether we will be using the same meds and if she will transfer more than 2. I so wish i could transfer before Sept but i dont think any principal will be too happy if i go on maternity before the end of the school year.....cant find myself loosing another job if i obtain one for the upcoming school year.
Myshel......I had no idea!!!!! I totally understand not wanting to write.....i was on a bfp board and had to type the news. Rooting for you and your two embies....if you need to chat im here.

 

[Lucinda7981]

Wanted to update that the generic results came back...it was a baby boy and nothing wrong with him
My RE office stated that they r cycling right now n therefore RE can't speak with me for another 2 wks...I'm so pissed!

 

[treasured]

My shell I'm so sorry for this ito awful. Is there any way they can tell you what happened or if there was a reason?

Lucinda- oh my God that's so hard to hear so they have no idea what went wrong? He just didn't stick? I'm so sorry! Omg how ridiculous how can they kiddy leave you in the lurch like this, it's awful you need to speak to someone. The health system over here doesn't allow for single doctor patient situations so I can empathise with how rubbish it is to have to discuss things with many different clinicians.

Lots of hugs at this difficult time girls

As for me I'm okay! So grateful to be here but also still terrified of somthing going wrong. This infertility journey has made me cynical, but I'm trying hard to enjoy every minute. Xxxxxx

 

[Lucinda7981]

Thanks Treasured ...thing is he was a uterine pregnancy and had a heartbeat and then it stopped....I want to know why. So after trying again with RE office I'm hearing the repeated sorry we are cycling right now...2 wks is when re can talk to you. The nurse that was working with me after being told baby was male and normal had the response of sorry we are cycling talk to front desk.....how cold....I'm not paying right now so I'm not important? So I contacted the original office in Las Vegas and the receptionist emphasized with me and set me up with a Skype apt. Definitely looking forward to hopefully having a different plan
So exciting that your nearing 2nd semester!

 

[Nolimitxox]

Thanks Treasured ...thing is he was a uterine pregnancy and had a heartbeat and then it stopped....I want to know why. So after trying again with RE office I'm hearing the repeated sorry we are cycling right now...2 wks is when re can talk to you. The nurse that was working with me after being told baby was male and normal had the response of sorry we are cycling talk to front desk.....how cold....I'm not paying right now so I'm not important? So I contacted the original office in Las Vegas and the receptionist emphasized with me and set me up with a Skype apt. Definitely looking forward to hopefully having a different plan
So exciting that your nearing 2nd semester!

There is nothing more frusterating than a test that turned up no answers other than it was for sure baby they tested (because it was a boy). Im so sorry they brushed you off like that. Its so heartless when going through a loss. I hope they make time for you, you deserve and need it.

 

[Lucinda7981]

Nolimit yes I felt like I was in limbo.....im frustrated because I had such a good relationship with previous re...she would responding emails even if it was just to say okay got it or thanks.......I miss that. Of course before booking my skype consult I asked if I will have direct communication with re....I refuse to have this lack of communication again. The re was great but I only got to speak to her in person(I live out of town) or phone consult after booking apt if its imp and felt that nurses cant solve issue :/
How are you doing nolimit?

 

[Nolimitxox]

Nolimit yes I felt like I was in limbo.....im frustrated because I had such a good relationship with previous re...she would responding emails even if it was just to say okay got it or thanks.......I miss that. Of course before booking my skype consult I asked if I will have direct communication with re....I refuse to have this lack of communication again. The re was great but I only got to speak to her in person(I live out of town) or phone consult after booking apt if its imp and felt that nurses cant solve issue :/
How are you doing nolimit?

Im at a cross roads between donor eggs, genetic testing, focusing on some thyroid issues, and waiting to see our fourth RE

 

[Lucinda7981]

Nolimit maybe you can see a very knowledgeable RE who can advise bout needing donor eggs....advising on thyroid issues?