Delivery

[AlyssaDeVaul]

So today I've really been thinking about the delivery part after blocking it out for 12 weeks. I know it'll hurt obviously but I'm starting to get scared to be honest. I guess I just wanted to know other people's stories of giving birth.
Maybe it'll help, maybe it'll make me feel worse. I don't know.
But I want to know everything from what happens, how it feels during the contractions, pushing and possibly tearing and stitching, how long it took, etc.

 

[Baby4MeRenee]

I've also always been anxious and scared about that part. That could have something to do with why I've not wanted children or held off for so long, but changed my mind after noticing everyone else having children and feeling some type of void. I also have baby fever when I'm around babies or see babies after they're born. It's the tearing part that always scared me. I would love to have the baby via natural, but after a few stories of delivery from family, I'm sold on water birth or the epidural. Never been pregnant but I've heard that the contractions aren't too bad. They're like period cramps but 10x worse. Not sure if that's true or not.

 

[Weebles]

Well, I'm terrified of giving birth. Watching women give birth, usually a documentary but sometimes even actors makes me cry. Not just out of joy over the miracle of life but out of fear too. I felt that way my entire pregnancy with my son and I feel that way now to some extent as well. The only thing that scares me more than the pain of vaginal birth is the possibility of needing a c section. But after saying all that I will say that what makes it a little better this second time is that I know I won't be afraid anymore once I actually go into labor and here's why. Your body knows what to do even more than you do and you just have to trust it. There are traumatic births (with happy endings, the most important part!) and there are wonderful birth stories as well. Focus on reading positive birth stories, I've found that really helps me the most. Sort of welcoming the pain I guess because it's an experience I'm so glad I've had, it makes me so happy to be able to do this again.

 

[Girly922]

This is a brutally honest recollection of my very short labour with DD, my first baby.

I had a water birth with a back to back labour, it was a very positive experience. I was a week overdue with no signs of labour starting. I'd gone to bed with some back pain but managed to sleep as well as can be expected for 41 weeks. My waters broke in my sleep waking me up. Within less than 15 minutes I was freaking out and being sick because of the pain. I literally ran from room to room naked because I didn't know what to do with myself. DH helped me get dressed and in the car, the car journey was the hardest part, I was pushing and trying my hardest not to. Once at the hospital I got straight in the pool and delivered DD very shortly after. No time for any pain relief, DD came so quick I ended up with a second degree tear. Ring of fire is bad, but only while it's happening. The tear healed quickly and didn't hurt at all after the second day.

Your body takes over, and bodies know how to do this childbirth thing. I'm actually quite excited for labour again. I will be going the drug free water birth route again, but hopefully at home this time.

 

[jessmke]

I can't describe what contractions feel like, to me there is really nothing that compares to that kind if pain and they didn't feel at all like menstrual cramps. I had false labour for two days and was then in active labour for 36 hrs. I ended up with an epidural after about 30 hrs of labour because I hadn't slept in three nights and was absolutely exhausted. I would say that the contractions were extremely painful, but considering I coped with them for three days before getting an epidural they are manageable. I can't really comment on the pain involved with pushing since I had an epidural, I could feel contractions and the urge to push but it wasn't painful. I had a complicated second degree tear that took an hour to stitch up, but once I was all stitched up I healed fine with little to no pain. Definitely try to have a water birth or if you can't then spend a lot of time labouring in the shower, I found the hot water was amazing for pain relief, I only left the shower when I became too exhausted to stand or sit unsupported, and it was as soon as I got out of the hot water that the contractions became really awful. It all went by really fast considering how long it was. Try not to worry too much, your body will know what to do and it really isn't all that bad. My LO just turned 1 and I am 12 weeks pregnant with baby #2 and I am actually looking forward to the delivery, it really is an amazing experience even if it is really painful! And keep in mind every woman's experience of labour is different. I know a lot of women who said contractions didn't get painful until they were quite far into labour, whereas mine started extremely painful and stayed that way, I didn't get the slow increase in intensity that it seems most women experience.

 

[Weebles]

Sorry for two posts, I wasn't quite done before I submitted the previous one. I'm not totally comfortable going into a detailed birth story online but here is the general experience I had.

I requested an epidural right away, I didn't wait for the pain to become too much because I knew how scared I was and knew I wanted one. The contractions I remember felt like my stomach muscles were flexing and I had no control over it. I didn't find them painful at all. In fact, I really couldn't feel them at all and I was unable to push so my epidural was turned off. Not down, off. I'm sure there was some lingering effect but I felt everything and it was quite painful... But not scary. Your body just takes over because your body knows what to do. It's quite amazing. The worst part what when he was crowning but I was able to feel his head and that helped. And it didn't last long either, a few pushes and there he was. I tore a little bit, I think I needed three stitches, I wasn't numbed for them so it hurt and if I tear again I will request a local injection. Don't know why they think just cause you delivered a needle won't hurt but I know at least in my area it's not standard! Wth! Anyway, the pain doesn't last. Once you've delivered you have your baby and it kind of all becomes fuzzy, like you were in an altered state of consciousness for the whole thing. I'm still scared but I'm looking forward to it as well.

 

[SonnyH]

Just learn as much as you can about birth so you are as prepared as you'll ever be! I'm not sure where you live but I've found watching a factual documentary series like One Born Every Minute shown in the U.K. has really opened my eyes to some of the many different birth scenarios and what it's like in a NHS hospital! I've also read lots of different birth stories online, spoken to friends and read books from my local library! While I have no idea what my labour will be like, I take the mindset that this baby has to come out and I'll (hopefully) get through it! I'm personally going to go in with my options completely open to any pain relief I might need and not be afraid to ask for it. I'm also reading a book on hypnobirthing to see if it's for me. I like it so far, so I think I will attend a local class with my other half for more help with that method. Even if it just sees me through the first few hours! I think it's good to think about what you'd want/like, so you can do some reading on the different birth approaches or just be prepared with what kinda pain meds you want when you come to make your birth plan.

I think it's important to be prepared but try not to let it worry you all pregnancy. At 12 weeks, you've got plenty of time to enjoy your pregnancy before getting nervous! Your body will know what to do and you will just find a way to get through it, be it easy or difficult!

 

[Talia12]

I am terrified of needles and I was screaming out for an epidural by the time I was about 14 hours into contractions. They are bad (apparently worse if you're induced, which I was) - I felt like an animal, I couldn't do anything but scream, I barely registered my husband, mum or midwife - it's just you and the pain when the contractions hit. But they will get you through it. If you REALLY can't handle it, they'll give you pain relief, but you CAN handle it. It seems interminable at the time, like all of pregnancy does, but when you look back it's the blink of an eye. And you won't be alone in a hut somewhere - you'll have professionals there who will help you cope.
I had an episiotomy because my baby was back to back and pushing had become too difficult after 22 hours of contractions I could not physically give any more so they did a ventouse delivery. It's the worst and most traumatic thing that's ever happened to my body, but when they FINALLY pulled him out, not only did the pain disappear (even though I'd had the episiotomy AND I'd torn, the sheer relief of the contractions stopping felt like bliss) and I heard a cry and looked between my legs at a little naked, slimy body, I didn't give a sh*t about anything in the world, I reached out for him and looked at his face and the whole thing was forgotten. It's such a cliche, but that's because that's what happens.
You WILL get through it. You will have people to look after you, you just have to let them and your body guide you.

 

[Wannabe Mommy]

I was induced with a pessary and had a little gas n air towards the end. The contractions to me were like one of those tens machine waist tightened things but amped up really high. Yes it hurt but it was manageable not agony like a broken bone or anything like that. My labour was pretty short, first contraction to birth was 4.5 hrs. Pushing was almost a relief because my body really wanted to do it. Lex was born quickly only 3 pushes, ring of fire stung but was fleeting and I had a 2nd degree tear which required stitching.

I had a local for the stitches but honestly I was so focussed on the baby in my arms they could have been doing anything down there and I wouldn't have cared. Pre-birth I was really scared and embarrassed that people would be seeing my bits. When it came down to it there were multiple nurses wandering in and out of the room while I had my feet in stirrups and a nurse stitching me up. Didn't care at all!

Recovery from the stitches was sore for about 10 days, so walked like John Wayne and put witch hazel on my pads but I was out and about wandering to the shops 18hrs after delivery so not agony.

 

[ALiKO]

My 1st labor with my now 31 month old DD went by really fast. From the start of the 1st contraction to the time I pushed her out was 5 1/2 hours. I had a completely unmedicated delivery so I felt everything.

Contractions- feels like someone's squeezing your stomach very very tight and during them your stomach gets hard as a rock. Along with the tightening sensation you will also have cramping similar to period cramps but very different. They radiate throughout the pelvic region and feel like they pull downward near your crotch. My contractions were not that bad for me I felt like they were manageable. I actually prefer them over period cramps as they don't hurt as badly (I get really bad AF cramps) and you get a break in between them to concentrate, rest, and catch your breath (averaging either every 1 to 2 mins or 3-4 mins).

10 centimeter contractions- during this phase of labor which is when you will be ready to actively push the contractions are no longer painful (well in my experience) and feel more like your body is forcing itself to push. Almost like when you are throwing up and your body kinda like gags, or dry heaves (can't really describe it) if that makes sense where your body is forcing you to throw up. It's like that exact sensation but in your crotch/butt region (pelvis?).

Pushing- I had a lot of back labor so I felt most of it in my back. The only thing I can say is it felt like I was giving birth to a brick. The baby just feels like a hard solid mass and I also felt her head squeezing past my tail bone.

Crowning- sorry to scare you 1st time moms but this was the worst part for me. The sensation is burning, ripping, and stretching all at the same time. The good news is this step is the quickest and pain is over as soon as baby is delivered.

Tearing- I tore from vagina to the middle area (forgot the name of it, perineum?). Didn't feel the tear after about the 2nd day or so healed very nicely.

Hemorriod- got a huge one from pushing. Hurt worse than the tear and felt it for weeks afterward. Try to put a cotton ball with witch hazel on it to relieve pain and sit on a doughnut pillow.

Sorry if I grossed anyone out. Just wanted to give people as thorough a description as I possibly could as I felt the same way when I was expecting the 1st time and really wanted to know what it was like to give birth.

 

[boobee]

What I have learnt is EVERY delivery is different and until you have your first it is the unknown. mine and my friends waters broke at the same time, she had a 20hr deliver, I had a 4 hour delivery (both 1st babies).
My experience; baby was 9 days early and at my midwife appointment that day baby was not engaged. In the early hours in bed my waters broke. By the time I got to hospital I started with minor contractions and after a further 15mins was 4cm and in active labour.
I requested a water birth (all I dreamt of) and whilst it was soothing, by 9cm I needed to push and I hated the pool. I felt I had no grip and baby was distressed so I was put on the bed and taken round to see the consultants. My baby did not fully turn and was coming out facing sideways. I had an episiotomy (cut me down there) and by time I delivered I also had a 3rd degree tear which required a spinal for surgery. All this happened in just over 4hrs. I lost 2 pints (1 litre) of blood. The worst part for me was them trying to get the needle in my back for the anaesthetic so they could stitch me up!
All births are unique as are all female bodys. Some women are built for birthing, some have smaller frames. I healed well & it has not put me off having another & I managed it all with gas/air only (until the stitches post-birth). Don't worry. Trust your body and trust your midwives. Do as they tell you and all will be fine (ps the best advice they give when pushing is to bear down in your bum and basically push as if you are trying to do a poo!)

 

[boobee]

I've also always been anxious and scared about that part. That could have something to do with why I've not wanted children or held off for so long, but changed my mind after noticing everyone else having children and feeling some type of void. I also have baby fever when I'm around babies or see babies after they're born. It's the tearing part that always scared me. I would love to have the baby via natural, but after a few stories of delivery from family, I'm sold on water birth or the epidural. Never been pregnant but I've heard that the contractions aren't too bad. They're like period cramps but 10x worse. Not sure if that's true or not.

You honestly will not know until you labour yourself. All I wanted was a water birth, it looked so easy, less risk of tearing etc I HATED IT. I was cut and had a 3rd degree tear (basically the wall between your vagina and anus tore). I can hand on heart say that I was so lost in the moment I don't actually remember feeling the pain of that. I do remember the pain of the contractions and nothing can compare, they start off as period pains but by the time you are pushing that pain is indescribable. I even asked (as I was delivering the head) for her to be pushed back in and to give me a C-Section ha ha! The contractions were so bad. That said that was my personal experience. I know a lot of people who have given birth and every single one was completely different so have an idea what you want as a birthing plan but bear in mind it could completely change and the most important thing is to get your baby out safely and for you to be ok.

 

[Baby4MeRenee]

@boobee, oh God that sounds so horrific, but glad the baby was alright. That definitely changes my view on water births. I just watched some birthing videos and almost scarred myself for life lol. Definitely a eye opener. Takes a strong person to deliver without any meds, I couldn't imagine. I know the docs had a laugh when you mentioned to have the baby pushed back in lol.

 

[broodymrs]

You'll just do it. Trust your body and you'll get through it. My birth story actually sounds pretty horrific but it wasn't.

I'd been having occasional contractions for a couple of weeks. Went in to be induced due to being overdue and predicted big baby. Induced by pessary Sunday evening. Things started happening slowly, sent dh home as he was annoying me! (Didn't tell him things were happening). From 11pm to 4am I laboured on my own with midwives popping in and out to check on me. Went in the birthing pool which was lovely (go for that option if you can). Had some massage and essential oils. Then it got really painful. Was given pethidine around 4am. Dh arrived around 830 and I was in quite a lot of pain but things weren't progressing. During that day it's a bit of a blur but basically they gave me a picotin drip to speed things up and gave me an epidural. Epidural took all sensation away which I didn't like and I could no longer move my legs. Baby's heartbeat started to drop and meconium was in my waters when they broke them. They were basically trying everything to encourage baby out but he was getting distressed and didn't seem to want to come out! I'd actually gone from being fully engaged to 4/5ths. I'd got a monitor on baby's head after we had an emergency where they lost his heartbeat all together. At 4am on Tuesday I was given the option, give it another two hours or go for a section. I was only 5 cm dilated, my labour wasn't progressing, my baby was in distress, I'd been in labour since Sunday. I opted for the section. It all happened very quickly. Was given a gross drink which I immediately threw up, signed the consent papers and I was off to theatre. Section wasn't painful apart from one moment where I felt like I was having an asthma attack, had severe chest pain. But the anaesthetist immediately gave me something and it went. At 4.18am my perfect baby boy was born (and immediately weed on me!). In that instant the whole labour was forgotten. He was worth all of it, and at least I got to try various things out so I now know I like the birthing pool and pethidine, I don't like epidurals!

I'm booked for a planned section this time as I grow baby's that are far too big for my body but I'd definitely give natural a go if baby looks on track to be a normal size and labour started naturally. I don't think my body likes being forced into something it's not ready for (i.e. The induction).

 

[UnderPressure]

My son is two now. His birth is both fresh in my mind as we are now pregnant again, but also so long ago. I woke up at 2am and from 2am to 4am, I could not get my baby to move so we called the doctor and headed to the hospital to get checked out. I started drinking a cold coke on the way to the hospital and baby perked right up, though!

Everything looked good when we got to the hospital, but the doctor recommended that I be induced so I agreed. We were already a couple days past our due date. The used a balloon to start dilating me and began a pitocin drip. For the first day, contractions weren't bad but I also wasn't progressing. Baby was comfortable and had no desire to move! That night they let me off the pitocin for a couple hours since my body was no longer responding to it and they let me take a shower and eat a real meal, which felt great. That night, contractions became painful but manageable.

The next morning the doctor broke my water to try to encourage my labor to progress but because baby was not engaged, I was not allowed even to get out of bed because they didn't want the umbilical cord getting pinched. It was awful. Contractions got progressively more painful, but I was stuck at 4cm because baby wasn't moving down and pushing on my cervix. That evening, I told my husband I needed to have an epidural or I needed to die, that I needed to have the baby or I needed to die. The gave me the epidural and I did not enjoy it or the catheter that they placed in my bladder. It made my bladder/urethra hurt and I was still in a decent amount of pain. I hated that it also kept me from feeling my legs. Doctor came to check on me--still at 4cm, so he worked to try to manually dilate my cervix. That was also quite painful. I think he got me up to 6 or 7 cm.

I rested for a while and had the nurse check on my baby--he'd moved down some, and she agreed to let me up long enough to use the restroom. I got up and went to the bathroom. More time passed. I think the doctor came back around midnight and I was asking what we needed to do. He was concerned about how long my water had been broken at that point and the risk for infection for me and the baby. He recommended that we do a c-section, but agreed I could labor a little longer first.

Around 2am, I felt it--I felt my baby had moved and started pushing on my own. It felt amazing after two days of helplessness. I had my husband get the nurse and she started coaching us through it and to,d someone else to get the doctor--our baby was coming! I remember it hurting so bad but also feeling progress, feeling my child move and wanting to just keep pushing. At 2:47am, our sweet son was born and as I felt his body slip out, absolutely nothing else mattered. He was out and he was perfect and the pain just melted away. I had second degree tears and was definitely tender but didn't need anything stronger than ibuprofen to manage the pain/swelling.

I'm hoping to have a better experience and a natural labor (without pitocin and with the freedom to move) with our new baby, but if I had to go through everything again I'd do it in a heartbeat and ten times over for the joy of motherhood.

 

[Farmgirlalee]

Hey Ladies!

Here's my DD's birth story. I had obstetric Cholestasis which basically means my liver and kidneys weren't getting rid of the bile salts and they were building up in my system. My OB diagnosed me and I had blood draws every week but other than that and having to deliver a bit early it didn't really change anything. Well my (now ex) partner and I at the time only had one car so he dropped me off at work. I was working the night shift at a hotel and at around 7 I got a call from my OB. She asked me how I was feeling. I was fine. She said my latest bloodwork was off the charts and she was worried I was going to stroke or have a heart attack! She wanted to call an ambulance but I told her I would get to the hospital. So I was in for observation overnight.

The next morning during a pregnancy massage that the hospital sponsored, my water broke! I waited all day for contractions to start but nothing. I started to get worried so I signed the papers for induction. Then they had an emergency case come in so they weren't really monitoring my contractions well. The pitocin they use to induce is very aggressive and can cause more intense labor. At first the contractions just felt like pressure in my abdomen like I had been doing a bunch of sit ups all at once. Then as they upped the pitocin dosage they got worse. Eventually they got too intense for me to breathe through and they gave me some medicine that helped for a while. That was the worst part- the pitocin induced contractions. By 3 am I was in pain every few minutes but wasn't progressing. The nurses finally called my OB and she ordered an epidural for me which surprisingly did not hurt at all (I am not a needle person!) I was very grateful for the epidural as it allowed me to relax and let my body relax. I was only 2 cm at that point so all the pitocin they had dumped into me was basically pointless.

Around 9am they checked me and said I was ready to go, and stopped the epidural drug. I couldn't feel the contractions too well because of the epidural but I could still feel the birth canal. Pushing is a lot like when you are super constipated (sorry not the most lovely description but...). She got "stuck" once and that was the worst part of pushing where I felt her go through the pelvic girdle. It was painful for about 30 seconds and then I got a break. As she crowned that burned, but the doctor did an episiotomy very quickly to prevent uncontrolled tearing and I did not feel that at all. Because I had gone through so much I was so tired and couldn't seem to get her past the crowning stage. I told the doctor to help get her out, so they applied very gentle suction as I bore down and out she came! I only pushed for 30 minutes!

All in all if I could go back and tell my younger self anything, it would have been to run laps to get labor started instead of agreeing to the Pitocin. Please don't get me wrong- its a great tool, but my nurses were distracted that night due to a very serious emergency next door and I think ended up giving me way more than I needed.

Also the episiotomy saved me from bad tearing and I didn't feel the cut or the stitching. I am really grateful for that. The actual labor was tough- but manageable and way less than what I had built up in my head.

Healing afterwards was helped by putting vitamin E oil on my episiotomy area. You will want to lean forward when you pee so that your pee doesn't get onto the sore area and definitely do not strain to poo at all. It hurts way to bad if you do. I was walking around Wal-Mart with my parents the day after getting the finishing touches of baby stuff if that gives you any idea.

By the time you are ready to give birth you will feel hot, tired, big and achey and just ready for it all to be done. I think it's natures way of getting us mentally ready to go through labor.

 

[UnderPressure]

Oh yes! The burning of pee on the ouch afterwards is terrible. How come nobody ever says that? And the forever-long oozy bloodiness....

 

[xdxxtx]

It is hard to explain how it can be the most painful experience of your life but also the most amazing and maybe even, at times, enjoyable. It is something you have to experience with a good support system to fully understand. All of my deliveries have been vaginal. One was with an epidural, the second with a worn off epidural and three stitches after - yowch! But when you're holding that baby, whatever you may have gone through to get to that point just doesn't even matter. Enjoy it!!! Enjoy every second of yourself before your baby gets here, and enjoy every second or labor that you can before it gets too bad.

 

[Wish85]

Well if you really want to know I'll be honest. MY labour lasted for 48hrs and when my partner asked me what contractions felt like I said 'murder..it feels like what it would feel like if someone was murdering me.' To go in more detail, internally it felt like constipation pains x1000 and then at the same time my whole uterus felt like it was being squeezed in a vice whilst having a muscle cramp at the same time.

That being said, I had an epidural at 6cms and after that it was sweet relief because I could finally sleep and rest. I tore internally and externally but I didn't feel any of that thanks to the epi.

Please keep in mind your labour will be nothing like mine or the next person because everyone is so completely different. I was scared and I think that contributed to my long drawn out labour. I had never been in hospital, never broken a bone, the most pain I'd experienced was a stubbed toe so I felt totally overwhelmed and out of control. Now that I know what to expect I will go into this labour with a different frame of mind and hopefully it won't be as bad.

 

[amc90]

I remember asking this exact same question at 12 weeks but now I absolutely can't wait for labor.