Depressed and miserable... don’t know what to do....

[Maple_Fairy]

Although my nausea has eased off and my sickness has massively disappeared now at 15 weeks I am left feeling soooo low and depressed that I literally don’t how to cope anymore. I have absolutely NO excitement in me for this pregnancy which I have wanted soooo badly for YEARS. I literally just feel miserable and don’t know what to do or how to cope anymore. I’m so scared that I will feel this way once baby is born as well. Don’t get me wrong I want and Love my baby sooo freakin’ much but I just wasn’t expecting to feel this miserable. My anxiety is just going nuts at the minute.


Does anyone else feel like this or has felt like this and improved later?


I have an appointment with my Midwife tomorrow so will speak to her, although not really sure what she can do to help me...

 

[babyvaughan]

Your not alone. I felt that way with my first and again now with my second. We tried for so many years and then when it happened I freaked out. I was so scared I just wanted it to be a dream to escape the anxiety. It did get better for me and by around 20 weeks it went away. I think by then my hormones were calmer, I just started showing, I knew what I was having, and I felt movements which brought me happiness my excitement grew from there. I had a lot of anxiety him being okay until I hit the 3rd trimester because I was afraid of loosing him once my excitement had grown so strong and my bond to him was developing. I was able to be really excited. At birth day one was overwhelming but the next morning waking up I felt so happy and so in love. I'm pregnant again 3 years later and I have had it worse this time. I have been super sick this pregnancy but also just so depressed and anxious that I don't feel excited much I have moments here and there but then they end up turning into anxiety. I feel super guilty because I know i'll love this baby just like the crazy amount of love I have for my first son. I just am overwhelmed. I have read and my doctor said your hormones are crazy up until about the point me and you and then they level out so that may help us too. I am seeing my doctor tomorrow and I will share if I find out anything good.

 

[babyvaughan]

Also thanks for sharing this because It's something I have struggled with but felt really bad about even saying but it feels good to know I'm not alone in this. We will get through it!

 

[Maple_Fairy]

Oh I’m so glad I’m not the only one. I feel like such a bad mother already and baby isn’t even born yet. I saw my midwife yesterday and she is referring me to the doctor to see if they can put me in touch with a counsellor or something... I’m not very good at talking to people about my feelings but I feel like I’m going to have a nervous break down or something and I’m so scared I will feel so depressed when baby is born and scared that that will stop me from bonding with my baby..

What makes me feel even more anxious and depressed is constantly hearing from people about what I should and shouldn’t be doing or how I should be feeling... getting told I shouldn’t feel depressed as it will affect the baby (again making me feel like a terrible mother already!) ... I fell out with my mum today as she had a go at me for having my injections at the doctors... said I shouldn’t be doing anything to harm the baby.... sometimes I wish I could just go through this whole pregnancy with no one knowing!

Did you speak to someone today? How did it go for you? I’m sorry you have these feelings as well.... hopefully it will pass... I did feel a bit better after speaking to my midwife and we heard the babies heart beat on a Doppler which was pretty amazing..

 

[sammie13s]

I'm sorry your feeling this way. It's something I struggle with aswel. If you feel it's unbearable I would ask for medication. They are safe to take during pregnancy. They would rather have a happy mum. I would consider that luv. It's probably the quickest way to lift your moods too. I take 100mg sertraline everyday. And my baby is doing fine. In fact Iv taken them in all my pregnancies. Big hugs xx

 

[Maple_Fairy]

I'm sorry your feeling this way. It's something I struggle with aswel. If you feel it's unbearable I would ask for medication. They are safe to take during pregnancy. They would rather have a happy mum. I would consider that luv. It's probably the quickest way to lift your moods too. I take 100mg sertraline everyday. And my baby is doing fine. In fact Iv taken them in all my pregnancies. Big hugs xx

Thank you Sammie. I’m going to see what my doctor says about counselling and might try that first. I’ve been on and off anti depressants most of my life and not a fan of how they numb my feelings so if I can I would like to avoid them.. but I guess we will see! I just can’t wait to have baby.. not a fan of all these feelings and symptoms at all!

 

[Chezzer]

Hi
I'm not feeling depressed or miserable but I'm feeling anxious and all I worry about is my baby me dieing and me not knowing and finding out at scan or not finding a heart beat. I've not been referred to talking changes.

But when I was prego with my son my dad was dieing the he does I was 6 mnth prego then my sons dad won custody when he was 5 then at 7.5 yrs we found out he had a brain tumour and needed chemo for 18mnths (hes still with us and excited to be a big brother he's 13.5yrs) then my mate commited suicide then my mates son from 18mnths battled cancer until he was 4 but went to be an angel, then my grandad died then my Nanny a few wks later then I was r*ped my my ex ( not sons dad ) I also misscarried in 2010 here we are today in 2018 so yeah I'm a little anxious but all the above happened from 2004 - 2016 I just hope this is all going to be ok x

 

[Maple_Fairy]

I’m so sorry you are feeling like this as well. I’m suffering so bad with my anxiety it’s really effecting my days. Have you spoken to your midwife about how you are feeling? Where are you from?

I’m not sure what to expect when I have my doctors appointment next week but I hope they can do something to help... I wasn’t expecting to feel like this at all!

 

[sammie13s]

I have been on anti depressants since I was 21. I'm 32 now. I find I don't function at all without them. Then they decide to stop working and I have to do medication changes. But this pregnancy has made me so much worse. My heart literally bangs out of my chest and I have a over active mind. Think, think, think. Like it's uncontrollable. I'm waiting on the mental health midwives to get back into contact with me. Everyday is unbearable. Its ruining my life right now. Xx

 

[Lola]

I feel the same guys! I’ve not enjoyed this pregnancy at all so far. It’s been such a miserable time and my mood is super low. I’m really struggling.
It’s comforting reading that we’re not alone xxx

 

[Maple_Fairy]

I have been on anti depressants since I was 21. I'm 32 now. I find I don't function at all without them. Then they decide to stop working and I have to do medication changes. But this pregnancy has made me so much worse. My heart literally bangs out of my chest and I have a over active mind. Think, think, think. Like it's uncontrollable. I'm waiting on the mental health midwives to get back into contact with me. Everyday is unbearable. Its ruining my life right now. Xx

I’m so sorry you are going through this. It must be awful to change meds all the time as well. It used to take me about two weeks or so just to get used to a medication and it literally made me feel sooooo terrible until they finally started to work properly ...

I spoke to my doctor and he gave me anti sickness tablets to help me feel better sick/stomach wise although I’ve been too scared to take them ... so I haven’t bothered

Did you get to speak to someone in the end?



Lola I’m so sorry you have been feeling crap as well. How many weeks are you and have you spoken to anyone about it? Xxx